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Old 11-12-2013, 03:53 PM
 
Location: SoCal again
20,758 posts, read 19,961,186 times
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I hated salad all my life and it was just because my mom always prepared it the same way - with too much vinegar, it was just all sour and nasty.

Now that I am grown and know you can prepare it in about 50 different variations, I am a salad lover.
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Old 11-12-2013, 03:57 PM
 
Location: NYC
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My son was like this and thankful crew out of it. However when he was younger he would only eat certain foods. There are a couple of things that helped.

Put one food on a plate for every meal, soon the child will pick it up. Another is don't give in the child and let him or her stay hungry. It is really hard, but will work for some kids.
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Old 11-12-2013, 03:59 PM
 
11,642 posts, read 23,902,950 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LPDAL View Post
What did you do to broaden their spectrum of "liked foods", so to speak? Anyone been there, done that?
Edit: And if so, did the "clean your plate before you get dessert/leave the table" strategy work for anyone? Or are you opposed to that?
My oldest was a picky eater. The problem solved itself. He grew up and now he is not a picky eater. He still has foods that he doesn't like but he is not overly picky (he's 19).

We solved the problem by not making food a problem. We serve food. It gets eaten, or it doesn't get eaten. We do not fight. We do not force. We do not comment. People, including children, are allowed to dislike certain foods. They do not have to eat them if they don't want to eat them. I don't make something else, they can just skip the parts they don't like. Family meals are pleasant events. We talk, we joke, we eat. No fighting over how many peas someone ate or how many bites of meat someone else ate. Each of my kids has things they don't like. They just skip them when they are served. I don't make a second dinner they just skip the parts they don't like.

We don't do dessert on a daily basis so I can't comment on the "clean your plate before you get dessert/leave the table" strategy. I highly recommend just letting your child eat the things he likes and skip the stuff he doesn't like.
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Old 11-12-2013, 03:59 PM
 
15,546 posts, read 12,015,822 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve View Post
Almost every kid would do that if they had the choice, it sure sounds more exciting as a plate full of veggies. It is your parents fault if they gave you nasty food all the time and let you get away with it.
I have a friend whose brother will only eat chicken tenders, hot dogs, and birthday cake. His parents always make those things for him and make sure that any restaurant they go to either has tenders or hot dogs for him to eat. His family thinks its funny that he will only eat those things and lets him get away with it.

I remember shortly after I started dating my SO he had asked me if my parents ever required me to eat food I didn't want to since I'm such of a picky eater. His parents made him eat whatever was on his plate, so he'll eat just about anything. Like when we get fast food burgers I'll always order mine with only lettuce and tomato (big step up from getting them plain), and he has said his parents wouldn't let him make special requests. He had to eat the burger as it came, and has said he used to hate some of the stuff on his burger but got used to it over the years. Since being with him I've tried a lot more foods that my parents never required me to eat. Some of it I found that I like, some of it I don't. So while I'm still a picky eater, I have gotten a lot better.
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:11 PM
 
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I don't believe in the clean plate club. Dangling dessert isn't a healthy solution either.

My children are not picky eaters, but they would have been if it weren't for my husband. The first time my oldest said, "I don't want that," my husband said, "That's what we're having for dinner. Your mother isn't a short order cook." If he hadn't said that, I would have probably made something else.

As a result, I never cooked dinner according to likes and dislikes. Our rule was to try everything once, if you don't like it, you don't have to eat it. All items were served on the plate at every meal regardless of likes and dislikes. Even things they previously ruled out. They eventually start eating almost everything.

It is said, and it's true, that if a food is on a child's plate 10 times, the child will eventually try it. This is more about making an array of choices available, but not focusing on it, commenting on it, or making a big deal about it.

The downfall is catering to specific likes by only making things that they like or making something special just for them.

My sister's 2nd son would only eat 4 foods----hot dogs, mac n cheese, and two other silly things. He never age vegetables or fruit----cooked, raw or otherwise. He loved the attention he received by making meals a big deal. I told my sister to cut up vegetables on coffee table for the family to munch on while watching TV. She started leaving fruits and vegies cut up on the kitchen table all day. And she discovered that her picky eater was sneaking and eating them. She didn't let him know that she saw him do it. This helped her realize it was a power game with him. And that gave her the reassurance that it was okay to change her tactics.

She continued leaving foods out like that, and she started preparing meals the same way I did---telling this is what we're having. He pretended to starve himself at first. He made a big fuss about things being on his plate that he didn't like. She held her resolve by acting like she didn't care and replying you don't have to eat it. Eventually he started eating most things she served. He doesn't look sickly with translucent skin and dark circles under his eyes anymore.

The key is you have to stop talking about it. Act like you don't care what they like or don't like. It's no big deal. You don't care if they eat this or that or try this or that. As soon as you stop making it a big deal, everything changes. You serve food. Period. It doesn't matter if they eat it or not.

Last edited by Hopes; 11-12-2013 at 04:19 PM..
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:15 PM
 
2,098 posts, read 2,500,041 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LPDAL View Post
What did you do to broaden their spectrum of "liked foods", so to speak? Anyone been there, done that? Edit: And if so, did the "clean your plate before you get dessert/leave the table" strategy work for anyone? Or are you opposed to that?
I grew up under the "clean your plate" system and hated it, but I was very picky and it did force me to try new things. If my mom had let me, I never would've eaten anything but PBJ. As an adult, I love a wide variety of foods and can only think of 4-5 things offhand that I just plain don't like.

For us I think exposure and not allowing fallback options was key. Like there was no "okay, you don't like many things so you can have chicken nuggets every night" option. We never made a second meal for a picky eater or said they could have PBJ if they didn't like the meal that was made for the family dinner. Kids were not allowed to "make" their own plates until they were in middle school. We dished up a small serving of everything so it would be tried. If you finished everything served, you could get seconds of whatever you wanted or dessert or bread. If you didn't finish, you clearly weren't hungry enough for anything else.

I know there's disagreement on whether kids should be required to try new things or just allowed to eat what they want, but as a teacher, I will see kids who go on school trips and literally can't find one thing they are willing to eat out of a huge variety of choices offered. A friend's husband only eats about 5 foods and they are all "little kid" foods like chicken nuggets and plain hamburgers. There are some kids for whom it's a huge HUGE issue for whatever reason and maybe they need a special plan, but in most cases I think we make this into a first world problem instead of just insisting we eat what we're lucky enough to have been served.
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:16 PM
 
15,546 posts, read 12,015,822 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Natsku View Post
Texture was my problem too, I can't eat overcooked vegetables or slimy vegetables (like mushroom, aubergine or courgette) and my mum always overcooked them or roasted them which I also hated but as an adult I love raw or lightly steamed veggies. Experimented with cooking things different ways would probably help so many picky eaters.
I'm the same way. I won't eat frozen vegetables because they are usually too soft and mushy. My mom used to try and buy those frozen vegetables with cheese to try and get me to eat the frozen stuff, but it would still have that mushy texture. Or canned chicken noodle soup, the carrots are always too mushy so I pick them out.

Almost all of my picky eating is about texture. I won't eat certain lunch meat because its too moist and feels slimy to me. I used to always get subs for lunch from the grocery store, but then they stopped being consistent on what brand of turkey they used. I never knew if it was going to be the good Boars Head turkey or the cheap slimy stuff. As a kid my mom would buy me lunchables, but I would always just eat the cheese and crackers because the turkey or ham was slimy. I don't know why she continued buying me those things when it would have been cheaper to just buy a package of ritz crackers and some cheese.

But yes, steamed veggies are amazing.
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Texas
44,254 posts, read 64,347,350 times
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We were aware of this potential problem, so from day one of solid food, everything hit the plate.
And I mean everything. Indian food, Thai food, italian food, japanese food, fruits, veggies, various proteins, legumes, spicy food, bland food, salty food, sweet food...the common theme was all fresh, no processed.

We have a GREAT eater now. He has preferences, but he will try anything once. And he eats a whole, fresh, varied diet (age 23 months).

Start it early and throw the kitchen sink at them.
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:28 PM
 
Location: Finland
6,418 posts, read 7,247,233 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
We were aware of this potential problem, so from day one of solid food, everything hit the plate.
And I mean everything. Indian food, Thai food, italian food, japanese food, fruits, veggies, various proteins, legumes, spicy food, bland food, salty food, sweet food...the common theme was all fresh, no processed.

We have a GREAT eater now. He has preferences, but he will try anything once. And he eats a whole, fresh, varied diet (age 23 months).

Start it early and throw the kitchen sink at them.
I wish I had done that, it was my intention from the start. Though she had a lot of allergies which prevented that but also my own pickiness over foods stopped me even trying to make certain foods that she could have eaten. Will try harder with the next kid!
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Old 11-12-2013, 04:35 PM
 
2,382 posts, read 5,393,975 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
We were aware of this potential problem, so from day one of solid food, everything hit the plate.
And I mean everything. Indian food, Thai food, italian food, japanese food, fruits, veggies, various proteins, legumes, spicy food, bland food, salty food, sweet food...the common theme was all fresh, no processed.

We have a GREAT eater now. He has preferences, but he will try anything once. And he eats a whole, fresh, varied diet (age 23 months).

Start it early and throw the kitchen sink at them.
That's kinda what we did - I put a little bit of everything we're having on her plate. I've noticed it helps to use the sectioned plates as she hates things running together (same as her dad, he doesn't like his food touching either) .

I always include something filling and healthy that she will eat - like yougurt.

Kids LOVE dipping things. I buy the refrigerated greet yougurt ranch dressing.

I've also got a bunch of really cute little fruit and veggie Bento picks from when we lived in Japan.

Food picks| Japanese accessories online for simple bento recipes this place has some super cute ones, I have several of the sets they have - you can order some from amazon easy enough.
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