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The other day I was at my daughter's dance class. A mom who's child was new to the class was also there. During the class, the parents sit outside of the dance studio behind a one-way window to watch their kids in class. Since I was sitting behind the other mom, I could see that she was "Facebooking" on her phone. Then she switched the camera on the phone and began to film her child in the class. My daughter was in the frame of the shot, and I said "Please don't film my daughter". She got very angry and retorted "I'm not. I'm filming my kid". To which I replied, "Well, I can see my daughter in the frame and I'm not very comfortable with you possibly putting it on social media." She then said, "Well, only my husband will see this. My kids are adopted and I never put them on any social media and you could have asked me in a nicer way."
First of all, I don't know if her husband is a sick pedophile. She actually looked like Honey Boo-Boo's mom (I'm NOT even kidding!!!). Second of all, what difference does it make if her kids are adopted or not? I don't understand what that has to do with putting them on social media vs. a kid who is not adopted. Protecting kids and keeping them safe should be done regardless if they are adopted or biological. I don't get it???? Lastly, I think saying "please don't film my daugher" is polite enough. Can someone please weigh in on this. Is it unreasonable to ask someone (a complete stranger) to not film your child without your permission?????
It would certainly annoy me, but maybe she had no way to not film other kids while filming hers? Unless you do a very close shot, which would be ridiculous in a dance class, it's hard not to film other children.
You certainly were right to ask, I probably would have done the same thing, but she had the right to film her child, who is the focus of the video...
In that situation if it was another mom I didn't know, I would have asked her to please crop my daughter out of the photo before posting it online. I've offered to do the same when other people's kids got in my picture. Some moms appreciated it, and some didn't mind (I became facebook friends with most of them anyway, since we got to know each other after week upon week of sitting around ballet practice.) My daughter has since moved on to soccer, and it's a totally different crowd... Everyone takes pics/video at the games, and the soccer association even has a website for people to upload pictures/videos.
Now if it was some total stranger randomly taking pics of kids in a park and clearly not a parent, I would probably flip out on him (or her)
Honestly...I think you over reacted. If your daughter was in a dance recital...you are not going to be able to control who films her or where those pictures will go, same with any other public event...unless you keep your child away from all public events.
The woman has a right to film her child. If your child is in the picture, and you have issues, you can request it be cropped...but basically it is a public area.
I'm wondering why she said what she did about her kids being adopted. it makes no difference whatsoever. I think you have a right to keep your own child from being filmed. but in todays society with everybody with a camera and video capability I'm wondering if it can be prevented. Seems like the dance studio should put up some signs which say something like "Please get permission from other parents before you photograph or make videos of children other than your own."
You have no right to an expectation of privacy in a public place. You are CHOOSING to participate in a dance class with other children. They have a right to film their children participating in that class and to do what they like with that footage, even if your child is in that footage too.
Don't want your child filmed? Don't put them in a PERFORMANCE based class.
Honestly...I think you over reacted. If your daughter was in a dance recital...you are not going to be able to control who films her or where those pictures will go, same with any other public event...unless you keep your child away from all public events.
The woman has a right to film her child. If your child is in the picture, and you have issues, you can request it be cropped...but basically it is a public area.
This precisely.
I plan to film my daughter's big dance recital come April (regardless of the fact I'm not a fan of splashing my children across social media).
You're overreacting considering you have chosen for your daughter to participate in a public CLASS. Having two children I can assure you soccer, dance, gymnastics, swimming, school performances like concerts and plays are part of the territory.... if you have issues now about other parents filming a class performance you may need to reconsider what your child should participate in.
Honestly...I think you over reacted. If your daughter was in a dance recital...you are not going to be able to control who films her or where those pictures will go, same with any other public event...unless you keep your child away from all public events.
I agree. You have no idea whose family movies you've been in throughout your life. In fact, your daughter probably has been in other videos you don't know about. You just didn't actually see them while filming.
I think the comment about her husband meant that that they are only going to view it themselves, since he apparently couldn't be there. No need to jump to the "pedophile" conclusion!!
It sounds like the biggest problem was your tone of voice. You didn't begin by saying "hi," or introducing yourself, or chatting her up in any way. It sounds like you just barked out, "Please don't film my daughter" as if she were making child porn.
OP not for nothing the husband of the woman you yelled at had just as much right as you do to go watch his child's class imperson. How is filming it any different?
She actually looked like Honey Boo-Boo's mom (I'm NOT even kidding!!!).
So does one of my closest friends.
What's that got to do with anything?
(Next time. Make a friend. Say, "Hi. You're new? I'm Mrs. Flourpower and the girl in the frosted pink is my daughter Paloma." Then you chit chat a little before making a leap worthy of Baryshnikov to decide the husband is a pervert. It makes life much easier.)
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Lastly, I think saying "please don't film my daugher" is polite enough.
