Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Mama_Bear's example of the groceries her kids ask for (real food, not junk) shows that somewhere along the way they have learned about making good food choices, although she didn't specifically mention that.
Well..........sometimes they ask for stuff that I don't buy. Like a Carvel cake. Didn't get it. They can ask though.
When it about grocery, buying their clothes or toys i do include them to allow them to make their choices but, in all that i make sure that it good for their health and suitable for their ages. Concerning the purchase of a car i can include them about the choice of the color or options (accessory) for kids and all that according to the budget of course.
I admire the will power, I have to admit, depending the time of the month I might have gotten the cake. lol
I get them treats sometimes. I am sure someone will come on here and tell me I am spoiling them and that if they want treats they should go out and gets jobs to earn their own treats. But I just buy them.
the article is very vague. There is a big difference between asking a 4 year old's opinion and a 16 year old's opinion; and a big difference between buying snacks and buying a car.
I sometimes ask the family what they want for dinner this week. One kid without fail answers "cake" every single time. Obviously that's not happening.
I get them treats sometimes. I am sure someone will come on here and tell me I am spoiling them and that if they want treats they should go out and gets jobs to earn their own treats.
Depends on the treat.
A donut or an ice cream or a chance to get a stuffed toy from one of those claw machines? Absolutely. Mom's buying.
A Ferrari? They can go out and get a job and earn their own treat. (Though I'd reserve the right say obnoxious things like, "You know my son, the Ferrari owner, took me to Malibu for brunch.")
It really just depends on the item/purchase. I am considerate of their wants and needs and try to explain the difference. We give them an allowance even at 3 and 5 yrs old so they can learn the value of spending.
Sometimes we give them a few choices others I just decide! I think they need to learn that the world doesn't revolve around them! Ultimately we are the parents and our choices have a higher value.
I do include them in the process whether they are able to give input or not because it teaches them the value of our choices. They grocery shop with us and use coupons. We compare labels and prices. I also put ideas into their heads for example you can have this BUT you only get 3 of them but if you pick the other it has 6 for the same price. And we consider quality vs quantity.
We need to buy a kid art table this weekend and I am going to let them have some input into the decision. They are the ones using it afterall!
I had/have both my kids in full time daycare/afterschool and there is NO guilt to buy them more stuff. Heck I have noticed lately they have all this STUFF and they are barely home to play with it! They would rather go out on the weekends to the science center etc....
A donut or an ice cream or a chance to get a stuffed toy from one of those claw machines? Absolutely. Mom's buying.
A Ferrari? They can go out and get a job and earn their own treat. (Though I'd reserve the right say obnoxious things like, "You know my son, the Ferrari owner, took me to Malibu for brunch.")
My son probably had too much input. I was/am a single Mom and we decided a lot of things together ~ well, kind of together. I valued his input (especially on things like computers and televisions) but I have the final say since I have the checkbook.
When we moved a couple of years ago - it seemed natural for him to shop with me - since he knew no one and had nothing else to do for our first two weeks! He seemed to enjoy it at the time and helped me pick out our leather couch, etc. NOW, he's busy with friends and activities and don't imagine he would go furniture shopping with me.
But we had fun and I enjoyed working together with him. He loved the store the Great Indoors!
Ahh well - those days are over but I'm glad we did choose some important purchases together.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
