What Parents Really Want to Tell Teachers (5 years old, learn, student)
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My daughter, 4 going on 5, is smart as a whip. She is very quick, excels at puzzles, loves to organize. On top of that she is outgoing and funny. She is really "personality plus". All her teachers love her and I have no doubt she will sail through school, making a lot of As and being on the dance team.
BUT I don't think she is "gifted".
My son is funny too. He's cute and is a real sweetheart. But he is not so social. He struggles in school; he is disorganized. He is intense and thinks about things like nuclear design that his cousins, also 8 years old, don't think about. (They still think about Pokemon).
HE is gifted.
Really, if you are the parent of a gifted child, the difference is obvious; just like if you have a child with an LD, that difference is obvious.
The gifted child stands out from the norm.
Sit down because I'm going to pay you a huge compliment.....
You get it. You know that there is a difference between your children and how they learn. You also, obviously, appreciate them for what they are. Not what they could be. Or what you WANT them to be.
I am so impressed. This is one tough concept to grasp.
Now the trick is to see that they are each educated in the way that best suits them. One size does not fit all.
The other trick is making sure the Smart daughter doesn't feel inferior to Gifted son. And you also have to make sure the gifted son doesn't walk through life thinking he's superior to everyone else. (Can you tell I have stories, lol?) Every once in a while Gifted might have to be tapped on the nose and re-directed. Especially if his schooling puts him in gifted classes. (Some parents of gifted children can be major butt-pains. Oh, yeah. I've got stories.)
Good job Calgirl. p.s. I'd never pressure your son in his stuies. He's also sensitive. It's a very tricky (sometimes heart-wrenching for the mother) combination.
Thank you too for not just judging, but for understanding what I was trying to say....
and that is that my kids are different from each other. If you are a parent who knows/believes that one of your children is gifted, it doesn't mean you think ALL of them are gifted.
BTW--I am glad one is a boy and one is a girl and that there are 4 years between them.
If you wouldn't have a chip on your shoulder the size of Texas, you would realize it IS the point.
Everyone thinks that if you say your child is "gifted" you are bragging, etc.
But Jojo is right. Gifted children are (can be) hard to raise.
Gifted children do not automatically do well in school.
It is much easier to have a child like my daughter who is bright, but still fits the norm of the classroom.
THAT is why I was comparing the two.
YES!!!! It's very difficult to raise my DD, I would take 1,000 children with autism, over my DD. She gets bored easier, she has the ego the size of Manhattan. She is capable of doing well in school as long as she is engaged, if not engaged, she is mouthy, know-it-all, etc... She reminds me of Hermoine in Harry Potter. I have to be on my toes with her.
It is different. Gifted children are difficult to raise. And my dd does understand concepts beyond memorization. She is labeled as gifted, this is not something, I made up. I am of average-to-above average intelligence. My husband is gifted, as well. It's very common to have one child on the autism spectrum, and another on gifted end of the spectrum.
Or to have one child who is both. They're not generally opposites.
Sit down because I'm going to pay you a huge compliment.....
You get it. You know that there is a difference between your children and how they learn. You also, obviously, appreciate them for what they are. Not what they could be. Or what you WANT them to be.
I am so impressed. This is one tough concept to grasp.
Now the trick is to see that they are each educated in the way that best suits them. One size does not fit all.
The other trick is making sure the Smart daughter doesn't feel inferior to Gifted son. And you also have to make sure the gifted son doesn't walk through life thinking he's superior to everyone else. (Can you tell I have stories, lol?) Every once in a while Gifted might have to be tapped on the nose and re-directed. Especially if his schooling puts him in gifted classes. (Some parents of gifted children can be major butt-pains. Oh, yeah. I've got stories.)
Good job Calgirl. p.s. I'd never pressure your son in his stuies. He's also sensitive. It's a very tricky (sometimes heart-wrenching for the mother) combination.
Wish I could rep you, Dew, but I'd have to go spend a week on the religion board first.
Even amongst evenly-matched sibs, the inferior/superior thing arises. The two eldest neatly divided the world between the two of them. It was fine that one liked languages and one liked math, but the problem arose when "like" became "is good at". And because Susie gets a 100 and Josie gets a 99, Josie decides she's not good at math or she'd have done as well as her sister. Gack!
And oh, the kids I know who could use smacks with a rolled up newspaper...including, occasionally, Manchild. (Though since I'm pretty liberal with the nose-smacking, he doesn't need it nearly so often as a few of his classmates.)
YES!!!! It's very difficult to raise my DD, I would take 1,000 children with autism, over my DD. She gets bored easier, she has the ego the size of Manhattan. She is capable of doing well in school as long as she is engaged, if not engaged, she is mouthy, know-it-all, etc... She reminds me of Hermoine in Harry Potter. I have to be on my toes with her.
Not sure how old your dd is, but I can tell you that around here lectures often begin with "I don't care how smart you are, and I don't care how autistic you are. THAT <fill in the blank> is simply unacceptable and it will. not. occur. again." (Young Miss Aconite is in her early teens, and consequently hears a lot of lectures.)
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