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i'd be tempted to bring two identical barbies or other small toy -- one for the 4yo and one 'to donate' - you only spend $12-15 and the kid gets one and gives one.
:-)
IMHO, the 4yo parents should just say 'no gifts' and leave it at that. or let the child open the gift -- at 4yo, they really don't know if/when/how the gift gets re-gifted or donated. the fun is OPENING the present!!
Thank you all.I am thinking of donating in the childs name & getting an acknowledgement card.
I think that's a great idea.
If this family has any class at all they'll be able to explain to the child that this is another form of donating. And maybe (if they're smart) tell him about YOUR charity.
I know more and more people want to do charity instead of gifts, but I've found a lot of people don't investigate the charity and how much money they actually get. And how much they actually use to HELP people. (A lot of pockets are lined, sadly.)
You got some great advice here. To those posters.
I have to tell you. At some point I'd tell the parents I'd chosen a charity where much more of the charity gets my $ than the charity they'd chosen. Probably slip in a little info (with a smile on my face) on donating wisely. But that's just me. Always trying to educate the masses.
Is the party for a 4 year old and her little friends?....or is it a charity run for the adults??? Whatever happened to dropping your kid off for a good time...period, these parties should be about your child having a good time,...not for dictating charity work for the adults.The only adults involved in the party should be the parents and family of the birthday child.....for the invites it should be a few hours when they can knowtheir little gal/guy is having some fun.
Is the party for a 4 year old and her little friends?....or is it a charity run for the adults??? Whatever happened to dropping your kid off for a good time...period, these parties should be about your child having a good time,...not for dictating charity work for the adults.The only adults involved in the party should be the parents and family of the birthday child.....for the invites it should be a few hours when they can knowtheir little gal/guy is having some fun.
There will probably be an earthquake right here in the US; I agree with you, purehuman!
I am not real keen on these "give a charitable donation to" requests at parties. This was not going on when my kids were little, but my SIL gave herself a birthday party and made a request for donations to the Humane Society. No matter what charity you pick, someone will surely have a beef with it (cat got sick at the Humane Society shelter, etc). If you really want no gifts, specify no gifts. 4 year olds aren't old enough to understand even bringing a can of non-perishable food; older kids might get that. While tacky, you could specify a $5 limit on gifts, too. Then the kid has something to open. The parent can donate the stuff to the local children's charity, church nursery, or whatever later if they want. It's true that most kids in affluent areas have everything they need and/or want.
Thank you all, for all the great advice. I share your feelings about the the whole no gift idea or a charitable donation. I dont mind the donation concept for older kids either except that the doner should feel completely free in the way they choose to donate or not.After all we all donate to the community at some time or other and support our choice of charities.Its the whole part of almost being told what to bring in a gift & knowing its cash value even if it is charitable thing that I am uncomfortable with .
With all said, I do agree with one of the previous posters that the hosts have good intentions, but could have chosen a better way to convey their wishes.
hi,
dd has been invited to a birthday partyof a 4 year old. The parents have specified no gifts on the invitation but have suggested that attendees bring a charity gift certificate (which the birthday kid will later donate ) if they so wish. We dont go to many birthday parties so i dont know what the norm is.
My question is what is the etiquette here:
1>do i have really to bring a charity gift certificate at the party? I am planning to have dd stop by and give a card and a small goody bag for the birthday boy on his birthday.the party is on a later date.
2> what is a good amount to put on the charity gift certificate without looking cheap ,if i have to take it ? Any help will be greatly appreciated.....
The brithday kid is from the same neighbourhood whom we see once in a a while.
I think the whole idea is tacky, I've never heard of such a thing. The birthday child's parents have really put people in an awkward position. I guess the best option is donating to a charity and getting an acknowledgment card. I don't like the idea of a second gift though, with two gifts that becomes expensive, and possibly unwanted by the child's parents, anyway.
Quote:
Originally Posted by purehuman
Is the party for a 4 year old and her little friends?....or is it a charity run for the adults??? Whatever happened to dropping your kid off for a good time...period, these parties should be about your child having a good time,...not for dictating charity work for the adults.The only adults involved in the party should be the parents and family of the birthday child.....for the invites it should be a few hours when they can knowtheir little gal/guy is having some fun.
I agree with you for the most part, but I had to smile at the bolded. My youngest is 7, and it's only been this past year that parents have dropped their kids off at a party without staying, and then only a few have done that. Dropping a 4 year old off is unheard of here. Frankly I dread birthday party invitations, after two hours of being with a roomful of loud kids and parents I have the worst headache.
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To those posters.
