Women Asking a Guy Is She Pretty (jealous, fiance, brother)

[Larry Siegel]

Ha, I once had two women at the office ask me to rate them on a scale of 1 to 10. You can't win this one, but I was amused (and they were both very pretty) so I said 9 and 8-1/2. I never found out whether the 8-1/2 was pleased to be rated so high or angry that she was not a 9 - but she probably didn't care, she had lots of guys after her.

[jayrandom]

Originally Posted by Vectoris

It's just a request for reassurance, from someone with low self esteem. Tons of people are insecure - what's wrong with a bit of bolstering? lol

It depends on context. There are men that women should expect reassurance from--fathers, good friends, boyfriends, and husbands. One shouldn't expect reassurance from other, less connected people in their lives like neighbors, coworkers, and casual acquaintances. And definitely, definitely, definitely not from the boyfriend or husband of a friend or relative.

If my wife asks me if I think she's pretty I quickly answer "yes" because I actually do think she's pretty and part of being married is reassuring her when she has low self esteem. My daughter is only 16 months old, but if the time comes in the future when she asks if she's pretty I'll say "yes" because she's my daughter and of course I do, even if she were the ugliest creature ever born I doubt I'd be able to see her as anything but pretty. There are no other women who should be asking me if they are pretty. Either they know me well enough to know that I have a wife and shouldn't be making a judgement on her looks (even an empty, reassuring one) or she doesn't know me nearly well enough to ask such a personal question.

Of course, if a woman is looking for an objective opinion on how attractive she is, there are websites that where you can post a picture. With women especially posting a single picture will give you some information about how pretty you are and some information on how flattering the photograph is.

[diddlydudette]

I think anytime a woman puts up so many selfies on Facebook she is asking for 'likes' in other words she is fishing for compliments.

If Facebook had a clickable 'dislike' button or 'thumbs down' button, people would stop posting so many selfies.

[Zymer]

Originally Posted by CinnaBunney

I personally think it's weird, but I hear that it it happens a lot. If a woman asks a guy if he think she is pretty and he tells her that she's "nice looking", instead of "Yes, you're pretty", is he indicating something else? They say guys are simple, and not complicated. If they were so simple, why dodge such question? That's what I want to understand.

Guys can be stupid, especially younger guys, when a woman puts him on the spot like that.

For a long time, there have been very attractive women who have had much publicity- movies, magazines, etc., in an idealized manner with which few other women can compete. When a woman asks a man that question, his brain short-circuits, he compares the woman with whatever idealized face/figure is currently on his mind, his mouth opens and both feet are promptly inserted because he is too young/inexperienced/foolish/incapable of applying rational thought as to *why* the question has been asked (pick one or a combination, or others that I haven't listed).

Many, many, many years ago I was young, foolish, inexperienced with women and lacking in knowledge/wisdom, especially in the ways of women and how they think...and had no clue that absolute, brutal honesty is not always the best policy.

I was dating a lovely young lady, absolutely smitten, and one day I found myself in this exact situation. "Do you think I'm pretty?"

BZZZZZZT! Brainfried.

The pictures of a number of idealized model-type women flashed through my head and she did not, could not, measure up. She was amazingly cute and attractive, she had an infectious smile and a fantastic personality. It didn't matter that she would be unlikely to grace the cover (or centerfold) of a magazine, I was in love and I loved being with her. I couldn't imagine *not* being with her.

I still regret what happened next- both for what it must have done to her and how it must have made her feel, and because it was very likely the beginning of the end for us (because of that).

My mouth opened, and the words that came out were: "You're no Miss America, but..."

Even though it has been the better part of 40 years since then, I still remember that day...and the look on her face. Like a bullet fired from a gun, there was no way I could call those words back, there was no way to unsay them. I realized immediately afterward that it was totally wrong, but I had no way to fix it. It was too late, the damage was done.

She was young and insecure, and I was young and stupid.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Yes, guys can be "simple", and in addition to being defined as "uncomplicated" it can also be defined as "stupid" (as in "simpleton"). It isn't so much as being "dodging" the question, often it is being caught like a deer in the headlights, frozen, not wanting to be dishonest but acutely aware that she does not match whatever idealized notion of "beauty" may [currently] occupy some portion of his brain.

[Rusty Avocado]

Originally Posted by Sugah Ray

Here's the translation, it works for every guy in the planet:

Nice looking: Butt Ugly
Your pretty: You are kind of ugly
He starts flirting with you: you are ugly but Moderator cut: delete
Your gorgeous: Your ugly but nice enough I will lie.
"you are the prettiest girl I have ever seen": you're ugly but I don't care b/c I like men anyway.

LOL but not everyone is ugly, what about for a girl who IS actually pretty? Any code for that?? hahaha...

[Mr_Geek]

I usually reply with one of the following for fun:

No.
Define "Pretty"?
You have nice eyes.
Well, you see, that's an interesting question.

[Knightly Knight]

Originally Posted by CinnaBunney

I personally think it's weird, but I hear that it it happens a lot. If a woman asks a guy if he think she is pretty and he tells her that she's "nice looking", instead of "Yes, you're pretty", is he indicating something else? They say guys are simple, and not complicated. If they were so simple, why dodge such question? That's what I want to understand.

I just got done answering a friend who was complaining on FB,, she vented on FB about phony people and their games, people being moody and controlling and she doesn't want anything to with either, then she said, "the only one" I truly want, I can't have. So **** off losers, She wanted to be with me, I'm married. I replied back , without saying anything more this morning.

-"Take it easy, today is a new day and everything is cool, start there, you have a beautiful family, (single mother) and your blessed, your smart, pretty, and a hard working woman, with a beautiful daughter. you have everything going for you both"-


As a stand up guy, when I say, your a pretty woman, basically that means bellaaaaaaaaaa,

get it? and woman know that's a good thing, if your a stand up guy who doesn't lie cheat or play games.


Good day.

[luv my dayton]

Originally Posted by CinnaBunney

I personally think it's weird, but I hear that it it happens a lot. If a woman asks a guy if he think she is pretty and he tells her that she's "nice looking", instead of "Yes, you're pretty", is he indicating something else? They say guys are simple, and not complicated. If they were so simple, why dodge such question? That's what I want to understand.

What age people are we dealing with, elementary school. As an adult those could be fighting words.Believe me men every bit as bad. Everyone fishing for compliments to bolster sagging egos.

[CinnaBunney]

Ok so what is the difference between "nice looking" and "pretty"? When it comes to describing a woman?

[Nema98]

Asking casually any men you meet if they think you are pretty is in fact kind of weird. I would not advise a woman to do it, it reeks of low self esteem. I can't recall the last time a woman has asked me if she were attractive to my eyes or not.