Is she flirting, or is she asking an innocent question? (women, attractive)
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Let me preface this by saying I do not harass women at all. I don't flirt nor do I acknowledge flirting, as I know nothing about the woman doing it and I feel many of them just seek validation from any male. That said, I am not hostile towards random women I don't know in public, but I don't come off as approachable and thirsty for their acceptance, either. Passing a hot woman in the street is no different than passing a guy, I keep it moving and mind my business ('ignore' sounds harsh, but it's what I do).
I'm 6ft 5in tall and that attracts attention--it's also why I never get flattered by being noticed. I was in a fast food place a couple of hours ago, playing around with my phone as I stood at the counter awaiting my order. Out of my peripheral vision I noticed a girl come stand next to me at the counter, waiting to have her order taken but glancing at me a couple of times, even bending over to do something to her shoe. When she straightened up she looked over at me again, then asked 'Did you order yet?' I told her 'Yes', went back to my phone (gorgeous, gorgeous girl, by the way).She walked to my other side and peered over the counter for the cashier, who hadn't re-appeared from the back yet--I told her they'd just opened and were still getting set up. "That sucks," she muttered, but still friendly and cute as could be. Finally the food came and I was going to wish her a good day as I left but the cashier was asking for her order and I wasn't going to interrupt.
My point in posting this:she could've been asking an innocent question, she could've been trying to make herself seen in hopes I'd initiate conversation, she could've just wanted to see if she could excite the guy ignoring her on his phone. I admit it's always nice when an attractive woman goes out of her way to talk to you--but I NEVER take it too much to heart. Some of them sincerely ONLY want directions, some are honestly ONLY asking you for a cigarette. On the other hand, I've had a few walk away angrily or with a puzzled look after I gave them the directions or the cig with absolutely no hint of flirtation (and as politely as possible). I just don't like to assume every woman is flirting and I know being tall is a magnet for the 'I need attention from any random man" types.
My thoughts are that everyone has asked this question, including me.
The truth is that there would be no way of knowing unless you let the conversation go further.
You either let an opportunity pass you by or you didn't.
I'm not sure what is lost by conversing with these women who want your attention. If it didn't bother you, you wouldn't have noticed or posted about it.
Next time, try flirting a little and see where it goes. Or don't. You really have nothing to lose, but you'll never know unless you try.
You are seriously over-analyzing this for someone who claims to ignore women. I don't know the woman in question, but if she was trying to get your attention and flirt with you, it was a pretty poor attempt.
That's just it--I don't want to let a sincere opportunity pass by. And what I mean by ignore is that I don't feed obvious attention-seekers. I've had good random encounters with women I don't know, but I don't feed into strangers (or co-workers) who seem to just expect men to fall down with desire for them because all the other opportunists pretend to.
It does bother me that I might miss out a good, sincere woman while dodging the ones I have no interest in.
That's just it--I don't want to let a sincere opportunity pass by. And what I mean by ignore is that I don't feed obvious attention-seekers. I've had good random encounters with women I don't know, but I don't feed into strangers (or co-workers) who seem to just expect men to fall down with desire for them because all the other opportunists pretend to.
It does bother me that I might miss out a good, sincere woman while dodging the ones I have no interest in.
But again, you won't know unless you try. Like you say, you might miss out. So what if you accidentally pay attention to an attention-seeker in the process? What does it really cost you?
Let me preface this by saying I do not harass women at all. I don't flirt nor do I acknowledge flirting, as I know nothing about the woman doing it and I feel many of them just seek validation from any male. That said, I am not hostile towards random women I don't know in public, but I don't come off as approachable and thirsty for their acceptance, either. Passing a hot woman in the street is no different than passing a guy, I keep it moving and mind my business ('ignore' sounds harsh, but it's what I do).
I'm 6ft 5in tall and that attracts attention--it's also why I never get flattered by being noticed. I was in a fast food place a couple of hours ago, playing around with my phone as I stood at the counter awaiting my order. Out of my peripheral vision I noticed a girl come stand next to me at the counter, waiting to have her order taken but glancing at me a couple of times, even bending over to do something to her shoe. When she straightened up she looked over at me again, then asked 'Did you order yet?' I told her 'Yes', went back to my phone (gorgeous, gorgeous girl, by the way).She walked to my other side and peered over the counter for the cashier, who hadn't re-appeared from the back yet--I told her they'd just opened and were still getting set up. "That sucks," she muttered, but still friendly and cute as could be. Finally the food came and I was going to wish her a good day as I left but the cashier was asking for her order and I wasn't going to interrupt.
My point in posting this:she could've been asking an innocent question, she could've been trying to make herself seen in hopes I'd initiate conversation, she could've just wanted to see if she could excite the guy ignoring her on his phone. I admit it's always nice when an attractive woman goes out of her way to talk to you--but I NEVER take it too much to heart. Some of them sincerely ONLY want directions, some are honestly ONLY asking you for a cigarette. On the other hand, I've had a few walk away angrily or with a puzzled look after I gave them the directions or the cig with absolutely no hint of flirtation (and as politely as possible). I just don't like to assume every woman is flirting and I know being tall is a magnet for the 'I need attention from any random man" types.
Your thoughts?
Ummm....you were on the receiving end of this, Big Guy.
You are way over-thinking random encounters with women by placing "flirting" on some sort of social pedastol. Since you have a negative opinion of this overly inflated notion of what flirting really is, you go out of your way to avoid responding in a way that could be taken as friendly or inviting and therefore come off as cold and isolated, this squashing any opportunity to figure out the true intent of the women approaching you.
Hey, it's just a random chance meeting where a woman initiated conversation with you. If you wanted to know her intentions, be open and engaging in reply. Even if it is a little bit of flirting due to interest, what is the harm in being nice in return? Heck, maybe something nice would come of it.
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