Deep Thoughts (Waldo: compensation, humidity, fishing)

[Submariner]

If your left hand doesn't know what your right one is doing, you should consider running for a job in Washington.

If your mind goes blank, remember to turn down the sound

If your ship doesn't come in, it's time you swim out to it

[Eastport4me]

A bird does not sing because it has an answer -- it sings because it has a song.

A brook would lose its song if God removed the rocks.

A calm sea does not make a skilled sailor.

[Submariner]

If your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt

If you're feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it

If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.

[Submariner]

Ignorance is temporary; stupid is forever

Ignorance is the mother of superstition

Ignore your health and it will go away

[Eastport4me]

What does an atheist do when he drives up behind a car with a "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker and that car doesn't move when the traffic light turns green?

Was it a rich or a smart person who said: "Money can't buy happiness."?

I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and never his prescription?

[Submariner]

Illegal aliens are an American problem. Ask any Indian

I'm busier than a one-eyed cat watching two mouse holes

I'm not schizophrenic, I'm multi-faceted

[Eastport4me]

A closed mind is a good thing to lose. A closed mind is like a closed book; just a block of wood. (Chinese proverb)

[Submariner]

Imagination without learning is having wings but no feet

In data, the figure most obviously correct, is an error

In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular

[Submariner]

Incest gets you involved with relatives

Indecision is the only key to flexibility

Isn't everybody happy? - Machiavelli

[Eastport4me]

"As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools"

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they`re cramming for their final exam.