Would Like to Make Friends!!! (Houston, Howe: student loans, preschool, incomes) - Texas (TX) - Page 3 - City-Data Forum

Mommy/Artist/Lawyer · 05-08-2009, 06:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by texas7

Well the majority of people who leave their kids in daycare don't "dump" them with a group of strangers. Most check them out very well. When mine were young (yes they were in daycare - and honor students btw - so they weren't damaged by the "dumping") the stay-at-home Moms were snooty and ugly at the children's school functions as if they were doing some superior job to those working moms. I was always nice and cordial but my thought was "get a grip on yourself - your staying home doesn't make your kid any better or worse than a working mom." I found it rather amusing. However, could be that some of those stay-at-home moms perhaps had some hidden self-esteem issues and acted the way they did due to treatment from the working moms - what a cycle with women.

My mother was divorced when I was 2 and I grew up in daycare so I speak from personal experience. I don't care much you think you may have "checked" out your daycare, unless your daycare is run by old friends or your family you are leaving your child with strangers. It is only by the grace of God that nothing happens to them while they are with those strangers. Trust me there is a lot that can happen in an 8 hour period either as a result of neglect, impatience or cruelty.

I was a good lawyer and I had to make a severe budget adjustment to do this SAHM thing. It wasn't really something I pictured for myself. However, I am a realist. No other person is ever going to treat my son as well as I do. I don't get much personal pampering these days but I don't ever have to worry whether some flustered daycare worker has given him wiper fluid instead of juice or if some creepy pedophile just scored an awsome new job as childcare worker.

As for snooty mothers. I have met a few myself. Some have been SAHM's and some have been working professionals. I don't judge any woman for the choices she makes. Some of my good friends are working moms. However, reading a post about how kids who spend their lives in daycare are intellectually and socially superior to kids who aren't in daycare, makes me want to hurl.

Obviously I survived my daycare years ok. However, I remember how sad I was when my mother dropped me off and how much I missed her all day. My mom would say she was fastidious about checking out our daycare but I could still tell a few horror stories.

LAM1010 · 05-08-2009, 08:43 AM

Okay, so maybe from what every1 is saying the attitude, snottiness and unfriendliness has nothin 2 do with being a workin mother or SAHM. It's just a case of the individual's inherent character. Just my luck that I seem to have a congregatn of them on my street....Mmm.
Anyway, I am still open 2 befriending all ya out there : SAHM or workin mothers. I don't mind. Having read the different threads being posted it blows my mind when I think about the sacrifices women hav 2 make on a daily basis. I don't recall readin anythg about the husbands sacrificin their careers n stayin at home. Or is it a case of whoever makes the least income stays at home?

lane_change · 05-08-2009, 09:07 AM

As a husband, I make sacrifices as well. For instance, I only went golfing once this week. lol

My wife's problem is that she works from home and spends her time either in the office, or on a plane...so her social interaction is really low since she does not go to work, does not have lunch with people, hang out in the break room, etc...as a Pharmacist, assuming you work at a retail location and not the hospital, you probably have a very limited social network as well, which makes it hard to make friends from work, which is where most friends come from. I know when I move/relocate, I tend to meet peopple from my like interests in the automotive groups, from racing, events, etc... Maybe you need to look into a group that is centered around a hobby of yours, that is not just work/family. Then you may meet people in that arena that also have jobs, kids, etc...and who knows. So look into some sports, hobbies, activities, etc...bowling, paintball, skydiving, or whatever it is that you enjoy.

katmama · 05-08-2009, 11:26 AM

I am not yet in Houston, I will be there in a week or so. Why don't we start our own "meet up" group?? I was looking at that site and I did not see anything that would apply to me, and many of the groups were closed to new members. I would be willing to put some time into getting that going...anyone else?? I will need a little time to get settled in after my move, but I could start looking into it.

My email is:

katliese@yahoo.com

Email me if you want to participate...this is also a great place to keep tabs on what is going on...or perhaps we can start a new thread, free from ANY debate or nastiness.

This will be a "come as you are" group.

feufoma · 05-08-2009, 11:39 AM

Sampaguita said:

"I'm guessing you don't have children based on some of your assessments on this thread."

Yes, I have an amazing two year old son in a Montessori pre-school that is a tremendous joy! And, yes, I guess it depends on the child and certainly on the parents. However, based on my observations of the children I have encountered in my son's "circle", I have noted some major differences in the childrens' level of social interaction and intellectual development based on whether they are in childcare, pre-school, or with a stay at home parent. Children in pre-school in my own observable universe tend to me more engaged and engaging. It's just my observation... I'm not trying to be offensive; but was just wondering if others had noticed the same dynamic.

Sampaguita · 05-08-2009, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by feufoma

Sampaguita said:

"I'm guessing you don't have children based on some of your assessments on this thread."

Yes, I have an amazing two year old son in a Montessori pre-school that is a tremendous joy! And, yes, I guess it depends on the child and certainly on the parents. However, based on my observations of the children I have encountered in my son's "circle", I have noted some major differences in the childrens' level of social interaction and intellectual development based on whether they are in childcare, pre-school, or with a stay at home parent. Children in pre-school in my own observable universe tend to me more engaged and engaging. It's just my observation... I'm not trying to be offensive; but was just wondering if others had noticed the same dynamic.

My apologies for taking your words to be from a non-parent which obviously you're not.

And no, I've not experienced the same exact dynamic as you have. As I mentioned earlier some of the most intelligent & well-spoken children I've ever met had not even stepped foot in a daycare or pre-school yet.

ReneeG71 · 05-08-2009, 12:15 PM

To the OP..seems we're in the wrong neighborhoods. I live near The Woodlands as well, and have the same problem. I love all the moms in my area, but they all work and I stay home. I no there are sahm around I just haven't met them yet. I am hoping to meet some at the pool this summer.

Sampaguita · 05-08-2009, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LAM1010

Okay, so maybe from what every1 is saying the attitude, snottiness and unfriendliness has nothin 2 do with being a workin mother or SAHM. It's just a case of the individual's inherent character. Just my luck that I seem to have a congregatn of them on my street....Mmm.
Anyway, I am still open 2 befriending all ya out there : SAHM or workin mothers. I don't mind.

Quote:

Originally Posted by katmama

I am not yet in Houston, I will be there in a week or so. Why don't we start our own "meet up" group?? I was looking at that site and I did not see anything that would apply to me, and many of the groups were closed to new members. I would be willing to put some time into getting that going...anyone else?? I will need a little time to get settled in after my move, but I could start looking into it.

My email is:

katliese@yahoo.com

Email me if you want to participate...this is also a great place to keep tabs on what is going on...or perhaps we can start a new thread, free from ANY debate or nastiness.

This will be a "come as you are" group.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ReneeG71

To the OP..seems we're in the wrong neighborhoods. I live near The Woodlands as well, and have the same problem. I love all the moms in my area, but they all work and I stay home. I no there are sahm around I just haven't met them yet. I am hoping to meet some at the pool this summer.

Well...maybe we should try to join forces & meet up then. We may as well be pro-active about it and maybe posting to c-d is our *most* common thread (hah). If we don't gel, at least we gave it a go. But if we do gel, then we'll have made some progress towards making friends in the area.

Katmama - I'll email you. What area of Houston are you going to be moving to?

LAM1010 · 05-08-2009, 01:36 PM

Starting our own meetup sounds like a good idea. ReneeG, maybe u and I should switch neighborhoods or sthg. It sounds as though u live close 2 where I live. The postal address says Spring but we r so close 2 the Woodlands we have been annexed so we pay our taaxes 2 Montgomery County n the school district is Conroe
Now with regards to this meetup, has anyone got an idea how we can get this thing up and going. Katmama, how long would you be in Houston for. I guess we could all meet up at a location for a drink & dessert only if we all didn't have the dynamics of childcare 2 think about.
Lane.... sorry I'm not sure what ur full username is; but maybe u could tell ur wife about our proposed meetup group which I guess could be named - "Come as you are - working. Stay at home mom, single etc"

Black Jack22 · 05-08-2009, 02:22 PM

In a city like Houston, given you are not in school and do not care for bars or clubs, meetup is the only alternative.