Chicago for single woman in early 30's (Atlanta, Lisbon: neighborhoods, to buy)

[iheartlisbon]

I was recently in Chicago for a convention and fell in loooooove with the city: the architecture, the transportation, the food, the diversity, and let me just say, the men. No matter if I was getting on a bus or going into a bar, whether they were 17 and had dreadlocks or 70 and using a cane, they were so damn chivalrous it knocked my socks off. It was, "After you, miss" here and, "Let me get that door for you there." I've lived in Denver, Boulder, Salt Lake, and Lisbon and in none of those cities did I ever feel that amount of courtesy, which was later explained to me as being Mid-western hospitality.

There are a lot of career opportunities for me in Chicago in my field, and I would like some perspective, especially from the señoritas, as to how the dating scene is. I am growing a bit tired of how both men and women want to date forever without ever really making an actual connection that leads to marriage. I do want to find the right guy and get married, but I realize that moving to a big city might make that a little harder, at least that´s what my friends who´ve lived in DC and Manhatten tell me. Thoughts?

[jman07]

We'll you were probably downtown. I have never found chicago chivalrous in any way. Nits quite the oppose IMO. Most women don't even want guys to be that way that I've dated.

And yes, there is no rush to get married here, even if you are in your 30's. But the good thing about that is that there are still quality single people in their 30's here to date. You don't have to feel like you missed the boat.

[probablyimnotsure]

I am guessing the OP has large breasts

[gelert]

I'm originally from Boulder myself. I don't find people in Chicago to be noticeably different in terms of hospitality or chivalry. Chicago has a much bigger pool of businesses, law firms, professional services, etc... so IMHO it's a bit easier here to meet men with good careers than it is in Colorado.

[marothisu]

Originally Posted by probablyimnotsure

I am guessing the OP has large breasts

LOL we laugh but there's probably some truth to this and/or the OP is good looking. There are definitely guys here who will do that stuff for the good looking/hot woman more than just an average woman. I see it all the time in some neighborhoods (I'm a guy but I notice these things).

[hlcvd]

Chicago is in the Midwest. But it's also kinda out on it's own. The culture here is quite different than most places in the Midwest.

[Atlanta_BD]

Marothisu, you guys may have a point that the OP's looks may have something to do with her experience.

Not to toot my own horn but I'm a bit "ample" up top, I'm slim and I have an attractive face (so I'm told lol).

I recognize that whether I'm in Chicago or Atlanta, men go out their way to be nice or chivalrous to me because of what I look like--even giving me things at a discount or for free when I'm out shopping or doing business. Last time I was in Chicago, I went into a convenience store to buy bottled waters, the attendent gave me the water for free. I rented a car for the weekend and the clerk gave me a higher grade car for the price of a lower grade one. When I bought my car, the salesman like me so he took $2300 off the price. Things like this happen to me all the time.

However, I definitely see what the OP is talking about. I have traditional views when it comes to dating. I'm pretty old-fashioned and I have to say, Chicago men appeal to my old-fashioned sensibilities more.

When it comes to dating, let me also say that southern hospotality is a bunch of BS! When it comes to dating, I find that Chicago men are much more chivalrous than the men in Atlanta in my experience. Now I can't speak of what the current dating scene is like for the OP since I don't live there anymore, but as a native Chicagoan and a woman, I agree with the OP that Chicago men are definitely more chivalrous.

You have a point that looks influence how men treat women, but I grew up and I lived my life in Chicago seeing men be helpful to women regardless of what they look like, simply being courteous.

[Aleking]

Originally Posted by probablyimnotsure

I am guessing the OP has large breasts

Originally Posted by marothisu

LOL we laugh but there's probably some truth to this and/or the OP is good looking. There are definitely guys here who will do that stuff for the good looking/hot woman more than just an average woman. I see it all the time in some neighborhoods (I'm a guy but I notice these things).

typical misogynist CD Chicago posts, so trashy

[marothisu]

Originally Posted by Aleking

typical misogynist CD Chicago posts, so trashy

So misogyny is now pointing out that you've witnessed many times this happening with guys basically favoring good looking women in everyday life? Oh, so I guess it's misogyny now to point out that you see good looking women in clubs getting more free drinks from guys than other women. Perhaps now it's called "prejudice" when you go to a country and you make an observation that some group of people is being treated more poorly than another. Please, it's a ****ing observation, not a call to action.

I think you're confusing what is being witnessed with someone actually stating they take part in it. I never said I partake in that (and I don't since looks are natural and it's stupid to favor or not favor them for a menial thing like opening a door because of something natural). All I did was state what I observe in everyday life. If that's misogyny, then people who simply observe anything in life should be called whatever they're observing. No, that's not what it is. You don't become something just because you observe it. It doesn't mean you're taking the action of the doer, as the observer. ****ing get over yourself.

[hlcvd]

Originally Posted by marothisu

so misogyny is now pointing out that you've witnessed many times this happening with guys basically favoring good looking women in everyday life? Oh, so i guess it's misogyny now to point out that you see good looking women in clubs getting more free drinks from guys than other women. Perhaps now it's called "prejudice" when you go to a country and you make an observation that some group of people is being treated more poorly than another. Please, it's a ****ing observation, not a call to action.

I think you're confusing what is being witnessed with someone actually stating they take part in it. I never said i partake in that (and i don't since looks are natural and it's stupid to favor or not favor them for a menial thing like opening a door because of something natural). All i did was state what i observe in everyday life. If that's misogyny, then people who simply observe anything in life should be called whatever they're observing. No, that's not what it is. You don't become something just because you observe it. It doesn't mean you're taking the action of the doer, as the observer. ****ing get over yourself.

that's deep...