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I agree with what Ms Ghilarducci says about there being almost a 2-tier retirement reality in our country. I live in a community of about 5000 with many, many retirees, probably like 70% here are retirees, and even here in an upper middle class neighborhood of retirees there seem to be 2 classes. There are those for whom money isn't much of an issue, I mean it's never discussed at ALL by some folks, and there are a cohort that complains about our annual HOA fee increase of 5%. For many years 5% meant ~$5/month, and they would complain loud and long about a $5/month increase. I'm glad we moved to a lower COL state after we retired, as it has changed us from the latter group to the former. Had I stayed in northern CA, I suspect I would still be one of those howling about the annual increase. It is possible for people in some parts of the country to change their quality of life in retirement by moving. Obviously not everyone WANTS to move, and that's one of those choices where everyone has to look at their priorities and what they perceive as necessary vs. what they perceive as the desirable outcome.
While MJ's parents moved to increase their style of living in retirement, he laments their loss of closeness with his kids, but being able to afford the retirement you envisioned is important to them, and only they can balance that against the frequency of grandkid visits to judge how that affects their happiness in retirement. I have a great lady friend who is balancing this decision right now. She and hubby moved here to live in retirement because it provided such an improved lifestyle for their income, but now she is considering moving back to where her grandkids are, after 15 years here. She really wants to be near them as her need for an active retirement lifestyle wanes in her late 70s, so she's going to move back in a couple years. The lower COL here has set her up nicely to live on her savings for the last quarter. This could be a 2-phase retirement strategy for those who struggle with these conflicting priorities.
There are also those who will complain about anything and everything including the very slightest increase in fees, taxes and things of that nature, even if they can very well afford it.
I know a retired transplant here who acts like the world is going to end if there is the tiniest increase in any fees he has to pay. He owns a small business here, a farm in the county, an AirB&B and still has a million dollar plus home in CA. Both he and his wife have large pensions as well. Currently they are cruising for about a month and traveling in the U.S.
Sometimes those that complain the loudest are the most affluent, but unless you know them, you might assume they are hard up for money.
no doubt once one isn’t raising a family expenses should be less .
but our kids were out for a decade when we retired so we were still working as a couple for many years so we saw once we were home daily we were spending far more then when we were stuck at work all day .
the kids were no longer part of that comparison.
travel , entertainment, eating out and bringing in increased big time , we wanted a more high end car so our car budget jumped a lot , we now have expensive long term care insurance premiums .
starting next year we want to be snow birds
so our budget easily exceeds the old working one
I guess it depends on when you had your kids but in our case we were in our mid 30's when our first was born and mid/late 30's when the second one was born. So the expense of having kids at home is still part of the equation as we near 60, it's also a motivating factor in continuing to work - for now.
our kids were out by the time i was 50 and got divorced at 51 we were in our 20’s when we had our kids.
we do a lot of in country trips .
headed to mohegan sun to see a show next month , then staying over , next day heading to newport rhode island for a few days then coming back thru mysic ct where we will stay over and see the seaport and aquarium.
headed to atlantic city hard rock hotel in june as well to see a friends band perform . we will stay over a day or two
at the hard rock . loads of good restaurants . we don’t gamble much ..
we also booked a trip to hilton head sun city where we will spend a week then head over to savannah ga for a few days .
so our retirement is pretty busy.
we try to do something every month to get away
Last edited by mathjak107; Yesterday at 09:36 AM..
I agree with what Ms Ghilarducci says about there being almost a 2-tier retirement reality in our country. I live in a community of about 5000 with many, many retirees, probably like 70% here are retirees, and even here in an upper middle class neighborhood of retirees there seem to be 2 classes. There are those for whom money isn't much of an issue, I mean it's never discussed at ALL by some folks, and there are a cohort that complains about our annual HOA fee increase of 5%. For many years 5% meant ~$5/month, and they would complain loud and long about a $5/month increase. I'm glad we moved to a lower COL state after we retired, as it has changed us from the latter group to the former. Had I stayed in northern CA, I suspect I would still be one of those howling about the annual increase. It is possible for people in some parts of the country to change their quality of life in retirement by moving. Obviously not everyone WANTS to move, and that's one of those choices where everyone has to look at their priorities and what they perceive as necessary vs. what they perceive as the desirable outcome.
While MJ's parents moved to increase their style of living in retirement, he laments their loss of closeness with his kids, but being able to afford the retirement you envisioned is important to them, and only they can balance that against the frequency of grandkid visits to judge how that affects their happiness in retirement. I have a great lady friend who is balancing this decision right now. She and hubby moved here to live in retirement because it provided such an improved lifestyle for their income, but now she is considering moving back to where her grandkids are, after 15 years here. She really wants to be near them as her need for an active retirement lifestyle wanes in her late 70s, so she's going to move back in a couple years. The lower COL here has set her up nicely to live on her savings for the last quarter. This could be a 2-phase retirement strategy for those who struggle with these conflicting priorities.
I believe "retirement" is not one thing, but several phases.
1) active retirement while you are healthy and alert and have energy.
2) inactive retirement while you are relatively healthy and alert but lack energy.
3) inactive unhealthy retirement but you can remain independent through the physical struggles.
4) the last phase, should we live long enough, is the dependence caused by physical or mental incapacity, or terminal disease.
Of course, any or all of these may be truncated by sudden death, but if we live to a ripe old age, we are likely to go through these 4 phases. Those who have to "work till they drop", may not get to enjoy the first phase of retirement.
All of us should be aware that we are in just one of these phases, subject to change with changing needs.
Retirement is not a monolithic thing. It is a series of phases.
I have intentionally left out the outlier retirements such as lotto winners and tech genius who sell their company to Microsoft for $20 million at age 22, or retired NFL QBs with $100 million in the bank. I don't really consider coming into big money young as a "retirement" per se.
I believe "retirement" is not one thing, but several phases.
There is active retirement while you are healthy and alert and have energy.
There is inactive retirement, while you are relatively healthy and alert but lack energy.
There is the inactive, unhealthy retirement but you can remain independent through the physical struggles.
The last phase, should you live long enough, is the dependence caused by physical or mental incapacity, or terminal disease.
Of course, any or all of these may be truncated by sudden death, but if you live to a ripe old age, you are likely to go through these 4 phases. Those who have to "work till they drop", may not get to experience the first phase of retirment.
All of us should be aware that we are in just one of these phases, subject to change with changing needs.
Retirement is not a monolithic thing. It is a series of phases.
as ty bernkie found , we have the go go years , then the slow go years , then the no go years . spending is different in all three phases
as ty bernkie found , we have the go go years , then the slow go years , then the no go years . spending is different in all three phases
/to this list add the "Can't go" years. During Covid so much shut down & make one afraid to go. Four years later still has not returned to normal. So many places closed if they didn't have drive by. I need a place to wash hands & before eating.
I agree with basic premise. Maybe you get the 6% for the years from 62-63 up to FRA. Then 8% from FRA for the 3 years to 70. But life doesn't work that way. For many reasons lucky to make it to FRA.
our kids were out by the time i was 50 and got divorced at 51 we were in our 20’s when we had our kids
It's good that you were able to recover from your divorce and find a lady to share your life with. You've got a nice retirement together which is wonderful. I'm sure that you'll have fun snow birding.
My husband and I were DINKs early on in our relationship so by the time we had kids we already had been homeowners for awhile, had a fair amount of home equity and had a decent retirement nest egg started. Our youngest will be graduating from college within the next year - he'll need to get a FT job with benefits. And I expect that our expenses will drop significantly.
We're starting to get a vision of what retirement will be for us. I know that when we were in our early 50's with two in HS retirement seemed far away and quite abstract. Now it's right around the corner which is both excellent and kind of scary in a way, too.
working longer is not our choice . its a choice determined by our employer , the economy , our health and the health of those we are responsible for .
most who claim they will work longer or until they drop , for one reason or another can't.
Well, yeah.
Most people don't literally just drop working dead at their desks. Most people don't just drop dead anywhere, doing anything (although unexplained sudden death is increasingly more common). Most humans age, weaken, sicken and/or suffer injuries, and then die, sometimes a long lingering death, often after a protracted period of various degrees of disability.
Also, anyone can be fired at any time (especially as we age) or find him- or herself in a caregiver role.
Most of us aren't in total control of our lives at ANY age or stage, but people can still strive to work as long as possible.
That all seems self-evident? Not sure we needed an "expert" to tell us this!
Most people don't literally just drop working dead at their desks. Most people don't just drop dead anywhere, doing anything (although unexplained sudden death is increasingly more common). Most humans age, weaken, sicken and/or suffer injuries, and then die, sometimes a long lingering death, often after a protracted period of various degrees of disability.
Also, anyone can be fired at any time (especially as we age) or find him- or herself in a caregiver role.
Most of us aren't in total control of our lives at ANY age or stage, but people can still strive to work as long as possible.
That all seems self-evident? Not sure we needed an "expert" to tell us this!
actually people do need someone to present reality to them evidently.
survey after survey has them saying they will work to various older ages .
however follow ups show most never do
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