Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Thank you kindly. There should be some type of service profession like bereavement assistants, who'd help out people with logistics of death management - like making all the appropriate calls and making sure everything is expedited. Amazing how all sorts of entities - religious institutions, funeral homes, governments - make such a lucrative business out of death, but nobody seems to have come up with an idea of forming an agency that would organize and streamline all of the dealing with those entities.
Our funeral home was amazing, they led us through everything, and I cannot express how grateful I felt towards them.
__________________ ____________________________________________
My posts as a Mod will always be in red.
Be sure to review Terms of Service: TOS
And check this out: FAQ
Moderator: Relationships Forum / Hawaii Forum / Dogs / Pets / Current Events
Thank you kindly. There should be some type of service profession like bereavement assistants, who'd help out people with logistics of death management - like making all the appropriate calls and making sure everything is expedited. Amazing how all sorts of entities - religious institutions, funeral homes, governments - make such a lucrative business out of death, but nobody seems to have come up with an idea of forming an agency that would organize and streamline all of the dealing with those entities.
Between the funeral home and hospice most of those things were taken care of.
A 72yo neighbor became a widow early last month when her 83yo husband sucummed after 12+ years of fighting multiple cancers and cardiac disease. My wife and I spent a couple hours visiting with the widowed neighbor today.
• Her SS has been increased to match his previous amount, but this is effectively the same as losing her entire SS benefit amount.
• She will receive one-half of his pension benefit.
Needless to say, the only recurring household bill diminishing after his death is groceries. Out-of-pocket medical and prescription drug costs will also decrease.
But the overall big picture sure looks financially bleak for her in the future.
We all neeed to develop a financial plan to ensure continuity of life-style for our spouses if we predecease them.
They had 12 years to think about it and work it out.
They didn't.
My 2 cents, Very caring, wise Posters. Unexpected physical condition, making me think twice. Asked my 45 year old daughter-in-law,if her friends talk about Will's, who will take care of the children. We talk about every day life, only between my husband and I talk about end of life, they have a will.
Age 40, my husband disabled. We had a will already, to whom would raise our boys if we died. 25 years, in and out of hospitals, etc. When his death came, still a shock. Boys lived out of state, no one seems to know what to say or do. With my good Lord's guidance, managed to navigate through the paper work, Neptune Society most helpful.
Reason for Post, feel some of the Posts, Duh ! She had 12 years to prepare. ? Are you always prepared for life's events ? Handle Everything by yourself ? How wonderful for you !
Miss Merry Sunshine is having mobility problems, excuse the rant ? Reminds me not to judge .
My 2 cents, Very caring, wise Posters. Unexpected physical condition, making me think twice. Asked my 45 year old daughter-in-law,if her friends talk about Will's, who will take care of the children. We talk about every day life, only between my husband and I talk about end of life, they have a will.
Age 40, my husband disabled. We had a will already, to whom would raise our boys if we died. 25 years, in and out of hospitals, etc. When his death came, still a shock. Boys lived out of state, no one seems to know what to say or do. With my good Lord's guidance, managed to navigate through the paper work, Neptune Society most helpful.
Reason for Post, feel some of the Posts, Duh ! She had 12 years to prepare. ? Are you always prepared for life's events ? Handle Everything by yourself ? How wonderful for you !
Miss Merry Sunshine is having mobility problems, excuse the rant ? Reminds me not to judge .
We all know that we will one day "grow old" and die. For some of us, that day comes a lot earlier than for others. This lady knew for 12 years that this day was coming with her husband. And her husband knew it, too. But apparently he continued on handling their finances until he took his last breath and his wife never thought to ask him to show her how to pay their bills. To me, that was neglectful and extremely careless on her part and on his. It doesn't mean they are terrible people. But it was unwise of them both not to prepare better than they did. I wouldn't be able to sleep at night if I thought that a train like that was bearing down on my spouse.
You don't count anything below grade in square footage. A 1500 sq ft ranch with a 1500 sq ft basement is still a 1500 sq ft house even if the basement is finished. That house would probably have a 1000 sq ft attic. It sounds like people here would call it a 4000sq ft house.
Not in OK. Living space does not go by location within a structure.
My 2 cents, Very caring, wise Posters. Unexpected physical condition, making me think twice. Asked my 45 year old daughter-in-law,if her friends talk about Will's, who will take care of the children. We talk about every day life, only between my husband and I talk about end of life, they have a will.
Age 40, my husband disabled. We had a will already, to whom would raise our boys if we died. 25 years, in and out of hospitals, etc. When his death came, still a shock. Boys lived out of state, no one seems to know what to say or do. With my good Lord's guidance, managed to navigate through the paper work, Neptune Society most helpful.
Reason for Post, feel some of the Posts, Duh ! She had 12 years to prepare. ? Are you always prepared for life's events ? Handle Everything by yourself ? How wonderful for you !
Miss Merry Sunshine is having mobility problems, excuse the rant ? Reminds me not to judge .
Sad to hear about your husband - I do share that permanent pain with you; yes, death of someone who has been such a big part of one's life is always a shock, no amount of preparation can prevent that emotional reaction. Regarding the paperwork, as I said, even if everything is lined up, there are always unexpected details. Though I thought that termination of one soc security check with death of one spouse is something that people know about (the matter is not applicable to me, since I don't have a spouse/the second check to start with - the late great boyfriend and I were independent legal entities who had independent finances).
Yes, my previous employer"s pension plan had a MANDATORY surviving spouse payment unless the spouse signed off in person at HR after a full description of the implications of their signature.
But this was at a Fortune 10 firm. I don't know where her husband had his pension from. As a Heavy Equipment Mechanic it could have been at a small company.
Federal law, The Employee Retirement Income Security Act of 1974, requires that all qualified pension plans pay benefits to married retirees in the form of a "50% Joint and Survivor" benefit, i.e. the retiree receives a smaller benefit while (s)he is alive with 50% of that benefit continuing to the surviving spouse.
The spouse can waive the right to the continuing benefit at the time of benefit commencement so that the retiree receives a higher benefit during their life, with no benefits to the surviving spouse.
A 72yo neighbor became a widow early last month when her 83yo husband sucummed after 12+ years of fighting multiple cancers and cardiac disease. My wife and I spent a couple hours visiting with the widowed neighbor today.
• Her SS has been increased to match his previous amount, but this is effectively the same as losing her entire SS benefit amount.
• She will receive one-half of his pension benefit.
Needless to say, the only recurring household bill diminishing after his death is groceries. Out-of-pocket medical and prescription drug costs will also decrease.
But the overall big picture sure looks financially bleak for her in the future.
We all neeed to develop a financial plan to ensure continuity of life-style for our spouses if we predecease them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow
I do find it a little hard to understand how people can "not think about" this situation before it happens unless the one spouse is totally clueless about the family finances, things like where their income is coming from and how it's going to be impacted by one partner's death. We made sure that we both signed up for our pensions' had survivor benefit. If either one of us died, it would impact the other's standard of living. Before retiring, one has to look at the big picture, the long haul. Anything can happen health-wise, so if there are no provision for a continuing benefit, then one should get life insurance before your health precludes that option. Of course, even that might have been overlooked until it was too late to get underwritten.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lillie767
Federal law, The Employee Retirement Income Security Act of 1974, requires that all qualified pension plans pay benefits to married retirees in the form of a "50% Joint and Survivor" benefit, i.e. the retiree receives a smaller benefit while (s)he is alive with 50% of that benefit continuing to the surviving spouse.
The spouse can waive the right to the continuing benefit at the time of benefit commencement so that the retiree receives a higher benefit during their life, with no benefits to the surviving spouse.
With the eleven year age difference, the actuarial reduction might be significant.
Last edited by Maddie104; 12-18-2023 at 02:10 PM..
They had 12 years to think about it and work it out.
Which they did - mostly.
It sounded as if the only thing they didn't do was to formulate a detailed 'post bereavement' budget, using factual data. This is what all of us should be doing!
Loss of 50% of his pension and all of her SS was voiced as a concern by her. So maybe they were working with false assumptions? Or maybe she will be fine without those additional funds?
We will offer sympathetic ears, but it is not our place to pry out the details.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
