What is your biggest regret in life (spouses, retired, graduated)
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Go back 30 years. I owned a condo, a small 2/2. I had a mortgage. My father - who always needed $$$ - convinced me to take a 2nd mortgage out for $20K. It was someone like Household Finance and the rate was like 18%.
But I felt I had to do it. I did it. He caught up on his bills (I guess) and was able to pay my brother his back pay. My brother and my mom were able to attend a wedding up north for close family friends. My brother was the best man.
As a result, my brother met the maid of honor and can we say - 2 weeks later, they were married as well!! (They ended up having 4 wonderful kids but I'm getting way ahead of myself).
There were some situations over the next year that happened to me that moved me in the direction of starting my own business - a business that I would have for the next 17 years and would basically be the happiest time of my life. To start it -it was $20K which I got from my brother and my new SIL. (My brother became my business partner and we paid my SIL back in 6months).
It was a life changing event. I will never forget her/their kindness ever.
I cannot even tell you how many people told me 30 years NOT to lend that $20K to my father but it ended up being a true life changer.
I have regrets on some other things but NOT on that.
Now that I am the unofficial "family historian" of my family and attempting to chart the family tree, one of my biggest regrets is not interviewing and quizzing many of my relatives, now long dead, about my ancestors and family history.
When I was a teenager or in my 20's I was not interested in those things, as most young people are bored by genealogy. When I talk to my 91 year old aunt in Hollywood, Florida, she is always saying things like "I don't know or can't remember, but my great-aunt knew all that" or "too bad you didn't ask your grandfather those questions before he died ... he had a photographic memory!"
Last edited by Clark Park; 03-10-2012 at 04:37 PM..
You are right on regarding that post about interviewing your elders.
If it makes you feel better, about 15 years ago, I bought these gorgeous "Grandparent Memory Books" because I was concerned about this and wanted so much of it in their own handwriting.
I just could get any of the elders interested. Everytime I would approach my dad (and I'd even write it), he'd say "I'm not dead yet....." or something like that.
That makes me sad to hear a person say they regret being born!
Your life and being is the most precious thing on earth. That you were born is a wonderful thing, and you are luckier than you suppose!
No I disagree obviously. If I had never been born or never existed at all then I would not miss it either and it would not be the most precious thing if I never existed. I truely wish I had never been born or existed at all. I mean this in a lot deeper way than the superfluous way it may sound. it does not mean I want to stop existing now, just that I wish I never had.
I wish I had never started smoking. I quit almost 30 years ago, but took nine tries before I finally got that monkey off my back for good.
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See my other thread -
