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Who cares? He's doing what he wants, no need for jealousy if you're happy.
Im not jealous at all. I dont want what he has. Its not for me. I thought it was, but watching him work 60+ hours a week, watching him be stressed out and tired all the time, has made me decide otherwise.
He's my best friend, and Ive encouraged him the entire way. I want him happy. But despite all his career successes, he's not really happy. Havent you ever had someone close go through changes that made you do a little soul-searching yourself?
Some people naturally feel more insecure and need to greater lengths to feel secure. A sense of security is the most fundamental human need, coming before food and water and certainly before fulfillment and job satisfaction. See Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.
He's probably trying to fill a void in his life that he either cannot put his finger on, or he can but refuses to admit to it. So, cutting back on hours, working less, to do what, is probably his stance. He must be a very lonely person, to not even find the time nor reason to be introspect.
Some people naturally feel more insecure and need to greater lengths to feel secure. A sense of security is the most fundamental human need, coming before food and water and certainly before fulfillment and job satisfaction. See Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.
Very good point kodaka-- and it was what I was going to say why I am driven to be very successful at work.
I grew up poor. My mom and I lived with my grandparents. I never had much in terms of material things. For years I lived in a tiny house, with no hallway (i.e. bedrooms were connected and you had to go through one to get to another), and meager material goods. We were always concerned about money.
I hit a very rough patch in my adult years to where I literally only ate rice and margarine because it was cheap-- heck my cats only ate that too for a time period since I couldnt afford pet food.
For me, I would rather work 60 hours a week to move up the corporate ladder, be ranked the top ranking employee, and increase my earnings. I try to do everything I can to keep money flowing in, increasing my savings, etc so that I don't ever have to return to the life of my childhood and struggling adult years.
To me it is not about the material goods--- although that is nice since I love gadget and some expensive things like pure linen sheets (NOT cotton-- but pure flax-- if you live in the south there is nothing better for a nights sleep), but in general it is all about having an extra amount of cash flow in case the worst were to happen.
Some people naturally feel more insecure and need to greater lengths to feel secure. A sense of security is the most fundamental human need, coming before food and water and certainly before fulfillment and job satisfaction. See Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.
Good point. Having a sense of financial security in life can come a long way for most people.
Each person is different in terms of what is important to them career-wise. I work hard in building my career and have worked 50+ and sometimes 60+ hour work weeks regularly to be successful in what I do. When I first started, I noticed many colleagues who did the same role for almost 30 years, unhappy, and just waiting for the day they can retire at 62.5yrs of age. I decided then that I did not want to be that person. I didn't want a job, I wanted a career. Something that would give me a sense of accomplishment and give me the means to provide for myself and my family. I also wanted something to show for my hard work.
I don't hate my job, so that might be a difference between your friend and myself. But I have had jobs that I hated and I merely looked for a new one. However, that doesn't change my work ethic. Success comes with hard work (or extreme luck!).
I want something I like, something I can enjoy and specialize in...but I dont want it to become my life. I dont want it to become my main source of pride, and no job, no "career" will ever become #1 priority with me. An important part, yes, simply because I need it to sustain myself.
I want to live. Truly, completely. When Im old and losing my wits, and going back into the memories of my past, I want to remember not the job, but the people, the laughs. I want to be able to go back to memories full of true, real living, not behind some office door. Because in all honesty, you devote your life to something, you work hard every single day, sacrificing your time and moments with those you love and experiences that would enrich you as a person, for what?
I want something I like, something I can enjoy and specialize in...but I dont want it to become my life. I dont want it to become my main source of pride, and no job, no "career" will ever become #1 priority with me. An important part, yes, simply because I need it to sustain myself.
I want to live. Truly, completely. When Im old and losing my wits, and going back into the memories of my past, I want to remember not the job, but the people, the laughs. I want to be able to go back to memories full of true, real living, not behind some office door. Because in all honesty, you devote your life to something, you work hard every single day, sacrificing your time and moments with those you love and experiences that would enrich you as a person, for what?
You die at the end and are forgotten.
And if that works for you, then that works for you.
Personally, I prefer to be financially successful so that I can retire early, travel, and afford to be able to enjoy time with friends who live across the world.
Also, I dont think of my job as something I toil at-- sure there are days that it wears me out, but I enjoy my coworkers, my company and what I do. Hence, why it does not make me miserable but gives me a lot of fulfillment.
I want something I like, something I can enjoy and specialize in...but I dont want it to become my life. I dont want it to become my main source of pride, and no job, no "career" will ever become #1 priority with me. An important part, yes, simply because I need it to sustain myself.
I want to live. Truly, completely. When Im old and losing my wits, and going back into the memories of my past, I want to remember not the job, but the people, the laughs. I want to be able to go back to memories full of true, real living, not behind some office door. Because in all honesty, you devote your life to something, you work hard every single day, sacrificing your time and moments with those you love and experiences that would enrich you as a person, for what?
You die at the end and are forgotten.
Having a successful career or working hard doesn't mean you do not get to live or enjoy life. Your friend's life is only 1 example and I hope it doesn't make you think that hard work won't allow you to spend time with your family and friends or have a life outside of work. For me, working hard allows me to live the life I want. It allows me to take my family on the vacations that we want to go to, buy the things that we want and not only "needs", save for the future, save for kid's futures, etc. etc. We make our lives what it is. If you work 10-12hr days and go home and watch TV, then that is what it is. But after a 12hr day, I go home and spend it with my family. Or go out for dinner. Or meet up with friends for drinks. It doesn't stop me from having a life outside of the office. As a matter or fact, working allows me to enjoy it even more. As the saying goes, work hard. play hard.
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