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Trying to understand what duties of an executor make it such a hard and stressful job as I have be told by many.
Can anyone detail exactly what they had to do and the issues that came about?
I know all estates can differ but would like to know of experiences.
It just all the rules you have to file to get the paper work done correctly.
You may have to find "missing" assets or beneficiaries
Could have disputes with creditors and or beneficiaries.
Depends on the estate. My father-in-law's wasn't too bad and there were no fighting siblings; however, my husband who was the executor took a LOT of time off work to take care of closing everything out, selling cars, selling the house, etc. For all of these things, mostly everyone wants you there in person, with your notarized paperwork. It's not hard, it's just super time consuming. Then all the time spent on the phone closing credit accounts, online bank accounts etc.
My wife was co-executor with her sister on their father's estate and it was a truly long drawn out miserable experience. So my first thing I would say is do not agree to be a co-executor.
The other thing is to be very selective on who you hire as an attorney to work with you. The co-executor talked my wife into hiring a family member and it was a total disaster. After almost two years, my wife hired the original attorney she wanted in the beginning and paid several thousand dollars for him out of her own pocket to clean up the mess created by the family member attorney.
That being said, if my wife had been sole executor and hired the attorney she wanted, I believe that everything would have gone smoothly as he was an excellent estate attorney.
As others have described, executing a will includes a lot of specific tasks that must be completed correctly to avoid legal tangles. There are timelines dictated by the decedent's state of residence you have no control over. Even if the person's will is unambiguous and specific and the heirs cooperate, it can still take a lot of time to shepherd everything through the probate process. Banks, investment houses, insurance companies, and local government agencies (like the DMV if a car needs to be dealt with) can be balky to deal with. Entities holding the decedent's accounts may be unwilling to release their grip on their money. They don't see any reason to act quickly even if you do. There may be lots of little final loose ends to take care of, bills and taxes to be paid, utilities and upkeep on a house to keep on top of, sorting and disposal of contents to handle before the property can be sold.
If you want to get some idea what serving as an executor for someone might entail, do some research on their state's district court website regarding probate. They usually provide some sort of timeline and the requirements. Lots of Is to dot, Ts to cross. Retaining an estate attorney can be very helpful, especially if you live at a distance. They can keep you on track, help you avoid pitfalls, handle the court appearances and fililngs, public notices, and document preparation for you.
I am an executor for my mothers will, it’s been over a year and it’s about to close now. My mother had a lot of stocks that I wanted liquidated and that entailed a lot of phone calls and paper work.
Isn’t that what lawyers get paid that high percentage of the estate to do? Probate fees?
But again if accounts were POD and not part of the probate a lawyer may not want to do it.
How much participation lawyers have in the process depends on the state. In Texas, it's possible to have minimal participation from an attorney, although some counties require an attorney be present for all probate court hearings.
California has statutory attorney's fees if an attorney is involved. A million dollar estate will earn the attorney $23,000 for not a lot of work.
Trying to understand what duties of an executor make it such a hard and stressful job as I have be told by many.
Can anyone detail exactly what they had to do and the issues that came about?
I know all estates can differ but would like to know of experiences.
It can depend on survivors, their attitudes, if they have issue with what is in the will or with who is executor. Greedy siblings can also make it a miserable job.
I was executor of my dad's estate with my older sibling, she pushed me out. I had to get an attorney, we went to mediation that cost me $150,000 before the mediator told me she was out for my blood, demanding I give my dad's ashes back, saying mine were bigger which I didn't believe. My dad was put in 7 boxes, I picked up our 3 after they already picked up their 4.
The ex judge mediator told me in order to go to court, I'd need a minimum of another $150k. That's when I had enough.
They were jealous I was my dad's favorite when he knew my "mother" cheated on him. We did DNA 2 hours before he passed, it showed he is my father (we look alike). They also accused me of making the DNA results on my computer. They didn't believe he was my father for some jealous reason.
There was a reason I was his favorite, I worked with him since age 11. Always dropped what I was doing to help him out which neither of my siblings did. I also put my life on hold to care for him every day of his 8 month cancer fight.
Depends on the estate. My father-in-law's wasn't too bad and there were no fighting siblings; however, my husband who was the executor took a LOT of time off work to take care of closing everything out, selling cars, selling the house, etc. For all of these things, mostly everyone wants you there in person, with your notarized paperwork. It's not hard, it's just super time consuming. Then all the time spent on the phone closing credit accounts, online bank accounts etc.
I agree. My mother died last year and all she had was $1500 in the bank (she was in an ALF on Medicaid) so no probate was even required but it was still a PITA. The bank didn’t like the death certificate the funeral home sent (it was long form and they wanted short) so I get the right one, then I had to get my brother to sign and notarize that he didn’t want any of it, then they shoved state forms at me to fill out which I found very confusing (due to legal language vs consumer-friendly language). I had to go to county surrogate court office twice and the bank three times, just to close an account with $1500.00.
OP if you Google executor responsibilities you will get many checklists and you can see at a glance the responsibilities that come with it. It is a long list!
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