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I am sorry for you loss. I have lost several friends in the past few years. A friend just told me she is moving to Vegas in a couple weeks and it made me sad. I knew she had bought a home there but I didn't realize she was moving so soon. I think a lot about what you say about the problem of being alone in our later years. I have a husband and he has 2 children but they both are far away and I have no close family here. My plan, hopefully it is OUR plan, is to move to an active senior retirement community in AZ, or to Palm Desert where I have my plan for a community all worked out. I want to live in a situation where there are opportunities to make new friends and it seems to me that in the Active Adult Communities everyone is in the same boat and there are plenty of activities, clubs and social events. You could even run for a spot on the HOA if you want or be an organizer of one of the clubs.
My mom is almost 90 and has lived in the same small town her whole life. She has insisted all these years of staying in her house even though most of the family won't speak to her any more and my dad passed away 6 years ago. She can no longer drive and can only use one floor of her 3 story house. I don't understand her wanting to stay in that situation and since I see so clearly by her example how lonely that life can be I am making plans to be in a place where I have opportunity for social connections and activities. Also thinking about Plan B when I am a widow -- although my husband, who is much more social than I am, claims he will outlive me!!
I am 60 and have been making these plans for about 10 years.
I lost my parents and a best friend within a short time. They were three people whom I loved dearly and it was very painful. DH also lost a best friend around the same time.
All you can do is appreciate what happiness your loved ones brought you and realize how lucky you were to have had them in your life.
As we age, I find myself communicating more often with siblings although we live far apart. There is something comforting about someone who comes from the same family experience. I can understand how that loss strongly affects people as a major piece of your life is gone.
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