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Good day to all. I'm trying to understand my wife and her love of receiving gifts. How important are gifts in your relationship? Reason I ask that is I think sometimes my wife is constantly reminding me to get her a gift. Sometimes it's a bit too much.
To be honest there were a couple of holidays I didn't get anything for her, mainly Christmas. It was either due to poor planning on my part or we just did not have the money for the item she wanted. While I'm working on getting better at this, I just want to understand the importance of Gifts in a relationship. I'm simple Just cook for me, have sex, listen to me when I say something and respect me. Not too much to ask for. I don't ask her to get me anything that I can't get myself. Hopefully you all will understand what I'm saying.
Everybody is different and what makes you happy isn't necessarily going to make your wife happy. There's a book called The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman that can explain the different things that make some people happy. For example, I love to receive gifts. When my husband gives me gifts, that is how I feel that he loves me. He doesn't need gifts to feel loved, there are other things he appreciates that make him feel loved. There is nothing wrong with your wife wanting gifts to feel loved - so long as she reciprocates her love to you in a way that you feel loved by her.
Good day to all. I'm trying to understand my wife and her love of receiving gifts. How important are gifts in your relationship? Reason I ask that is I think sometimes my wife is constantly reminding me to get her a gift. Sometimes it's a bit too much.
To be honest there were a couple of holidays I didn't get anything for her, mainly Christmas. It was either due to poor planning on my part or we just did not have the money for the item she wanted. While I'm working on getting better at this, I just want to understand the importance of Gifts in a relationship. I'm simple Just cook for me, have sex, listen to me when I say something and respect me. Not too much to ask for. I don't ask her to get me anything that I can't get myself. Hopefully you all will understand what I'm saying.
You did yourself in when you forgot a major event the very first time - you basically taught her that you aren't reliable for remembering this kind of thing, so OF COURSE she's going to keep reminding you
The thing guys need to understand about most women is that we NEED to know you do think about us because we are always thinking about you It's how a woman feels appreciated by her guy. You PROVE you thought of her by actually producing a gift every once in a while - not just on holidays or special events. Doesn't have to be big or expensive, it's the gesture that really counts.
You did yourself in when you forgot a major event the very first time - you basically taught her that you aren't reliable for remembering this kind of thing, so OF COURSE she's going to keep reminding you
The thing guys need to understand about most women is that we NEED to know you do think about us because we are always thinking about you It's how a woman feels appreciated by her guy. You PROVE you thought of her by actually producing a gift every once in a while - not just on holidays or special events. Doesn't have to be big or expensive, it's the gesture that really counts.
While I agree that women need to know how their men feel about them, I don't think there needs to be any gift-giving. Or, at least, I don't need to be given gifts. For me, spending time with me and words of affirmation mean a whole lot more. If I want trinkets, I can buy them myself.
While I agree that women need to know how their men feel about them, I don't think there needs to be any gift-giving. Or, at least, I don't need to be given gifts. For me, spending time with me and words of affirmation mean a whole lot more. If I want trinkets, I can buy them myself.
I think you are kind of the exception to the rule, but as long at that works for you, carry on!
I just appreciate my husband coming home from the grocery store with something unexpected, like fresh strawberries or ice cream
Women love presents. Men are different than women in this area and think more practically and financially than women. It is not only a gift but a token of love to a women. The sad part of this is she is reminding you of this, which takes a lot away from the gift I think. First of all I would not personally remind my man, if he did on his own I would be happy, and if he didn't I would have a mental note of that. Being as she reminds you all the time I would think would take a lot away from the feeling of actually receiving one. I think if I were you I would tell her nicely that her badgering you about it makes you not want to and takes away from any surprise you had hoped to give. I would then remind yourself that women do love gifts and on your own now and then surprise her with something. Even small things like love notes, dinner out, a single rose etc. is good.
Good day to all. I'm trying to understand my wife and her love of receiving gifts. How important are gifts in your relationship? Reason I ask that is I think sometimes my wife is constantly reminding me to get her a gift. Sometimes it's a bit too much.
To be honest there were a couple of holidays I didn't get anything for her, mainly Christmas. It was either due to poor planning on my part or we just did not have the money for the item she wanted. While I'm working on getting better at this, I just want to understand the importance of Gifts in a relationship. I'm simple Just cook for me, have sex, listen to me when I say something and respect me. Not too much to ask for. I don't ask her to get me anything that I can't get myself. Hopefully you all will understand what I'm saying.
Gifts are not imortant to me but they are to my husband. Not getting them but giving them. I'm like you. It's the day to day stuff that makes me feel loved. My husband, however, spends a great deal of time planning the perfect gift. He just ordered a computer for me and keeps going over the specs like a kid in a candy store. I'm sittin' here thinking that I have to move everything to the new drive now . We, definitely, have different perspectives.
I try to remember what his gifts mean to him. I posted elsewhere that I now wear the jewelry he's bought me over the years and try to remind myself that it means a lot to him that he spent the time to pick it out. To some extent, it actually works. Touch is my love language so I'll fiddle with a pendant or ring just as a reminder.
Sounds like gifts mean a lot to your wife. Sounds like she likes the idea of you thinking about and planning for a gift to her. As in you think about her when you're not together.
Gifts are overrated in my book. Hubby and I exchanged gifts for b-days and Christmas while we were dating. Did it a few times after we married. Now 11 years later, we haven't done gifts in probably 9 years.
We buy what we want when we want it. We aren't the waiting till Christmas or b-day people. We go to Vegas every year for our anniversary, that's our gift to each other.
He's gotten me flowers a few times. I like them and all, but they don't last, so I sometimes think they are a waste of money.
It's his everyday love that is all the gift I need.
While I agree that women need to know how their men feel about them, I don't think there needs to be any gift-giving. Or, at least, I don't need to be given gifts. For me, spending time with me and words of affirmation mean a whole lot more. If I want trinkets, I can buy them myself.
I'm totally with you on this. I'd much rather have the money kept in savings or put towards something we really need. I don't exchange birthday, anniversary, valentines gifts with my husband and don't want to. Christmas, we don't exchange gifts, but we go out and buy ourselves something
yeah, we have been buying our own gifts 'from' each other for years...always perfect and exactly what we wanted!!! The only gifts we do exchange are Christmas stockings...we do it with all the kids. he does the grocery shopping and cleans the bathroom...what more could I want?!!!
he did bring me home a brand new laptop last year and the diamond earrings a couple yrs ago...and I ok'd his Sonar drum-set purchase....thats why I don't buy him anything...he's in the negative, gift-wise for years!!!
And yeah, we buy the little things we see at the store...or when we're out...
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It's how a woman feels appreciated by her guy. You PROVE you thought of her by actually producing a gift every once in a while - not just on holidays or special events. Doesn't have to be big or expensive, it's the gesture that really counts.
Being as she reminds you all the time I would think would take a lot away from the feeling of actually receiving one. I think if I were you I would tell her nicely that her badgering you about it makes you not want to and takes away from any surprise you had hoped to give. I would then remind yourself that women do love gifts and on your own now and then surprise her with something. Even small things like love notes, dinner out, a single rose etc. is good.
