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hey guys, easy up on the arguing. i'm sure i even deviated from my own thread, i was trying to evaluate the various possibilities really. and i also have a number of ideas running through my head about this subject, all really sparked by trying to keep something going with this east coast babe. so i truly appreciated the diversity of experiences with obtaining, developing and maintaining a long distance meaningful relations using existing technologies. and shout out a very be thanks to all who shared their personal experiences.
and as srjth always insightfully points out, this wouldnt cut it for everyone. and normally for me either, but the long-distance chemistry and connection has been so strong and enjoyable i am going to give it shot where as before i would have let that opportunity pass by. in fact, so far we like what we have going on and have no problems with each other pursuing other romances where we live, on different coasts. maybe that will change later and we will have to make some hard heartfelt decisions then, but for the time being an im so digging having my iphone ping away with messages from her that i don't know any older bachelor alive that would turn down one smoking hot 20s babe wanting more and more of his attention.
others can pursue their emotional rushes and needs anyway they believe fills their soul, because this one is so right on "for right now". i will worry about tomorrow when tomorrow becomes today. good luck!
But you can't "date" someone online either. It's just an emotional connection.
What you're suggestion, I'm assuming, is that I should continue to pound my face against the brick wall which is the "dating scene" here, which to me feels like a huge waste of time, because I've tried to do this, and was met with negativity, bad criticism, and several women wishing I'd kill myself. No, I don't think continuing that would be better than venturing outside of this area looking for some compatibility and someone who might find me attractive enough to want to get to know me as well as having the possibility of having a relationship.
But, you think I should continue to deal with more negativity by approaching the women here, and becoming more and more depressed with the world I'm surrounded by. I don't think that's a good idea for my own mental health.
What you're suggestion, I'm assuming, is that I should continue to pound my face against the brick wall which is the "dating scene" here, which to me feels like a huge waste of time, because I've tried to do this, and was met with negativity, bad criticism, and several women wishing I'd kill myself. No, I don't think continuing that would be better than venturing outside of this area looking for some compatibility and someone who might find me attractive enough to want to get to know me as well as having the possibility of having a relationship.
But, you think I should continue to deal with more negativity by approaching the women here, and becoming more and more depressed with the world I'm surrounded by. I don't think that's a good idea for my own mental health.
My Girlfriend and I have been together nearly 2 years and our main form of communication has been text messaging which is a bit unusual since we are in our late 30's and are a bit too old to have grown up with the texting generation but it is what she prefers so we just keep on texting and only call each other when its really important.
and as srjth always insightfully points out, this wouldnt cut it for everyone. and normally for me either, but the long-distance chemistry and connection has been so strong and enjoyable i am going to give it shot where as before i would have let that opportunity pass by. in fact, so far we like what we have going on and have no problems with each other pursuing other romances where we live, on different coasts. maybe that will change later and we will have to make some hard heartfelt decisions then, but for the time being an im so digging having my iphone ping away with messages from her that i don't know any older bachelor alive that would turn down one smoking hot 20s babe wanting more and more of his attention.
The only reason I'm insightful about it is because I've been through it and yes it feels really great while you're in it but I think you seem surprisingly clear-headed about it at this high point in time, so therefore, you probably won't get hurt in the end. You may hurt her though so be sure you're completely honest with her and tell her if you just want to keep this as it is. Or better, don't make any future promises you have not really thought about right now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prince_Frog
What you're suggestion, I'm assuming, is that I should continue to pound my face against the brick wall which is the "dating scene" here, which to me feels like a huge waste of time, because I've tried to do this, and was met with negativity, bad criticism, and several women wishing I'd kill myself. No, I don't think continuing that would be better than venturing outside of this area looking for some compatibility and someone who might find me attractive enough to want to get to know me as well as having the possibility of having a relationship.
But, you think I should continue to deal with more negativity by approaching the women here, and becoming more and more depressed with the world I'm surrounded by. I don't think that's a good idea for my own mental health.
Correct, however, you kept saying that people who do this should look closer to home for relationships. I agree that it's 100% better to have a relationship with someone whom you can see in person. In my situation, I'm telling you that it's not a very healthy thing for me to do, and I'm basically left with 2 choices: Either I look out for someone, or I give up and become a hermit. I know I'm always negative about there being anyone out there who could actually be compatible with me, I try to cling to the idea that there is someone-anyone, out there who might share some compatibility and that one day I might find that person. But it sure as hell isn't here, and the women have done just about everything in there social skills to let me know that it's a fact of life.
Correct, however, you kept saying that people who do this should look closer to home for relationships. I agree that it's 100% better to have a relationship with someone whom you can see in person. In my situation, I'm telling you that it's not a very healthy thing for me to do, and I'm basically left with 2 choices: Either I look out for someone, or I give up and become a hermit. I know I'm always negative about there being anyone out there who could actually be compatible with me, I try to cling to the idea that there is someone-anyone, out there who might share some compatibility and that one day I might find that person. But it sure as hell isn't here, and the women have done just about everything in there social skills to let me know that it's a fact of life.
I got it. I got it before. Do what you need to do, Froggy.
I know there may be examples of a sudden long-distance situation (out of town work project) where the couple could talk throughout the day, send pics, etc. Or a friendship occurred while traveling and you kept in contact via text and keep the relationship going beyond exchanging texts other than pleasantries?
When I'm gone for extended periods of time it's important for us to maintain that spark, but also to be respectful of time difference. My girl is great at understanding.
Me and my girlfriend never talk on the phone, but when we're together we talk for hours.
Talking on the phone is overrated
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