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Adding some life to this old thread (because CityData encourages us to!)
Just started getting involved with Meetups. For those that didn't realize that the original question had to do with an organized event through Meetups, that's what it is. He wasn't referring to a generic happy hour.
Having been to a few Meetups, I have to say that I agree with the meat market aspect of it. Now, the socializing is great, lots of interesting people, but there is this parallel thing going on at every event. The guys will tell you that you should NOT view it as a place to date... (unless it's for that purpose, but I'm talking about just a social group with married + Singles.) Yet, the guys that tell me this, are all dating someone they met at the group. And they point out guys and girls who have been dating different Meetup members, then moving on to others. Even if someone tries to say it's not a singles group, every single woman I met there was looking for a guy, and every single guy was hitting on the women.
It's rather annoying, actually. Not crazy about being descended upon by guys straight out of a Steve Martin SNL sketch. But I have really enjoyed getting to know the guys that were not trying to find a date (they were the ones that were already dating or pursuing someone.) It almost seems that if a guy isn't actively pursuing you at the event, they don't want to socialize.. unless they're already involved with someone. That's sort of complex, but you get the idea.
I'd enjoy the meetups more if there was not that subtext, but I guess that's what many people use them for... a dating pool. I think activity based groups, and groups where there are married and singles, are the least singles-bar vibed.
Adding some life to this old thread (because CityData encourages us to!)
Just started getting involved with Meetups. For those that didn't realize that the original question had to do with an organized event through Meetups, that's what it is. He wasn't referring to a generic happy hour.
Having been to a few Meetups, I have to say that I agree with the meat market aspect of it. Now, the socializing is great, lots of interesting people, but there is this parallel thing going on at every event. The guys will tell you that you should NOT view it as a place to date... (unless it's for that purpose, but I'm talking about just a social group with married + Singles.) Yet, the guys that tell me this, are all dating someone they met at the group. And they point out guys and girls who have been dating different Meetup members, then moving on to others. Even if someone tries to say it's not a singles group, every single woman I met there was looking for a guy, and every single guy was hitting on the women.
It's rather annoying, actually. Not crazy about being descended upon by guys straight out of a Steve Martin SNL sketch. But I have really enjoyed getting to know the guys that were not trying to find a date (they were the ones that were already dating or pursuing someone.) It almost seems that if a guy isn't actively pursuing you at the event, they don't want to socialize.. unless they're already involved with someone. That's sort of complex, but you get the idea.
I'd enjoy the meetups more if there was not that subtext, but I guess that's what many people use them for... a dating pool. I think activity based groups, and groups where there are married and singles, are the least singles-bar vibed.
How cruddy... meetup sounds like drama. "see that guy over dere? she's his baby mama.. you want to stay away from him him and him."
And the purpose of meetup is to engage in a hobby, and it gets that complex. sigh.. total facepalm..
Why dating gotta be so hard? Maybe you can try doing activities on your own and bumping into people randomly, as opposed to something like meetup which can be so generic, people putting up a front acting fake and all.. sounds like it's not your crowd anyway.
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