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The title says it all... I would like to see good moving in stories, bad ones, and ugly ones.
How did it work,? If it ended badly, how amicable was the break up?
When is living together a good idea,? When is it a bad idea?
When should couples live together? Or not?
I knew him for 9 years, lived with him for 6, we split up. I loved living with him. I loved him. I didn't think it was a bad idea. He had other ideas. *shrugging*
The title says it all... I would like to see good moving in stories, bad ones, and ugly ones.
How did it work,? If it ended badly, how amicable was the break up?
When is living together a good idea,? When is it a bad idea?
When should couples live together? Or not?
Good question Jasper.
I take note of my late grandfather, who, in the end, chose to live alone but still have an amazing relationship with a woman for over 15 years up unto his death. I still see this woman (she's still alive) and she greatly misses my grandfather more so then any of her prior x husbands. Sadly, she's not the same spunky woman anymore (think May West) after my grandfather passed because they did so many things together.
Anyhow, this woman begged to move in with my grandfather (and begged to get married) but he never gave in. My grandfather simply wanted his own personal space and wanted to be able to retreat to his own home and be left alone after work. My grandfather was also pretty experienced with women, and with money, so I know spending his final stages of his life alone was chosen by design for a particular reason.
Personally, I'm going down the same road, but for different reasons. My take is that familiarity breeds complacency and contempt. I see it pretty often how couples who live with each other take each other for granted.
I don't even understand why people need to move in with each other other then to save on bills, but when you fight because nobody has any personal space, was saving that little bit of money even worth it?
It turns into a bad idea during break up. If you want the person out of your house (say its your house) they legally do not have to leave until you evict them. That's when it gets really really bad.
I don't get this. When my husband said we are over. The second he said that, I got up and pack ALL my things. Maybe I am just too proud. But I can't fathom NOT leaving right away when the other person has said it is OVER. It is his house. But if it's MY house, I hope he does the same - leave, ASAP.
Now, if it is OUR house, like paying for it equally then of course I won't leave.
All I can say is that it's not for me. If you are not a terribly independent person, I guess it would be fine.
Honestly, I think age has a lot to do with it. If you are in your 20's or early 30's - it's probably not as hard as when you are in your 40's or older. It's a lot easier to make the adjustment to living with someone else when you haven't been on your own for that long. Before I moved in with my husband back when we were dating - I had never lived by myself. I had always had roommates. It didn't take much adjusting at all to get used to living with my husband - in fact, we loved it. But I have friends and my mom has friends who were divorced or widowed for a long time and then remarried - and moving in with their new spouses after living on their own for so long was very trying.
I am considering this step... Slowly contemplating. No rush. We spend so much time together, and it frustrates me when I cook dinner.. Oh, the cilantro is at my house, or I want to work on something, at my house. He is antsy at my place, does not have his stuff. So, we are considering this step.
I will say, I told him I was pretty done with living in two places. And went home completely for two weeks. I had my beadwork, my paperwork, doing things around my house I had been letting slide for awhile. He agreed it was time to make a change.... I don't feel I manipulated this, it was just I was done living g here, there, and ended everywhere.
So, the next few months we are going to clean out his place, paint it, fix it up, I will slowly move there, keep my own place for awhile, and see how it goes. O
The title says it all... I would like to see good moving in stories, bad ones, and ugly ones.
How did it work,? If it ended badly, how amicable was the break up?
When is living together a good idea,? When is it a bad idea?
When should couples live together? Or not?
I think if you're both mature, with open eyes as to the others "defects" it will work out just fine because ideally you'll be old enough to understand the gives and takes of living together.
But if only one person wants it... no bueno.
It really is an arrangement you're taking that's akin to marriage but without the bonds of marriage.
Like someone already said, you'll be washing the skid marks out. And if you want the person there, you'll do it rolling your eyes. If you don't want them there and they weaseled in... you tend to get angry at them leaving gross things laying around your house.
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Any future men I live with are doing their own laundry!
