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When our life is pretty "even-keel" we don't have a lot of emotions "swimming around" inside of us. We're more at peace...But it's different when a loved one is dealing with cancer or some other life-threatening illness...Or we might be under ongoing stress because we've been laid-off and can't find another decent paying job right away...Some situations can really "tax" and challenge us. And we may be at our "wit's end" because we don't have control over some things or easy or ready-made solutions etc...This is when we can get "bottled-up" and go off the "deep end" if we don't do something to try to release our emotions and deal with all of our fears and frustrations etc...Under normal circumstances we may not need to cry very often (Or yell and scream and beat-up a pillow etc.) But it's different when we face ongoing stress and trauma in our life. This is how it's been for me anyway. I can't afford to let my emotions get "bottled-up" inside of me for too long or I'll "crack-up!"
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,221,199 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CArizona
When our life is pretty "even-keel" we don't have a lot of emotions "swimming around" inside of us. We're more at peace...But it's different when a loved one is dealing with cancer or some other life-threatening illness...Or we might be under ongoing stress because we've been laid-off and can't find another decent paying job right away...Some situations can really "tax" and challenge us. And we may be at our "wit's end" because we don't have control over some things or easy or ready-made solutions etc...This is when we can get "bottled-up" and go off the "deep end" if we don't do something to try to release our emotions and deal with all of our fears and frustrations etc...Under normal circumstances we may not need to cry very often (Or yell and scream and beat-up a pillow etc.) But it's different when we face ongoing stress and trauma in our life. This is how it's been for me anyway. I can't afford to let my emotions get "bottled-up" inside of me for too long or I'll "crack-up!"
You captured it perfectly. That's how I am, more emotional than I've ever been, because of the emotional stress of being constantly subjected to potentially life-shattering or life-ending situations.
I remember once when I was in maybe grade six or something, we had some discussion about whether men should be allowed to cry or something of the sort. One of the guys said it quite openly and bluntly: "If men can laugh, why can't they cry?"
Trimac20...Hope things calm down in your life soon and you feel better...It's not easy to go through "storm" after "storm." (Or one trauma after another all in a row.)...It's like being on a roller coaster. Don't you think? When will the ride come to an "end" so we can get off and have a little peace and calm and serenity for awhile? (And some rest!)...Anyway take care. Thanks for posting.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,221,199 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by CArizona
Trimac20...Hope things calm down in your life soon and you feel better...It's not easy to go through "storm" after "storm." (Or one trauma after another all in a row.)...It's like being on a roller coaster. Don't you think? When will the ride come to an "end" so we can get off and have a little peace and calm and serenity for awhile? (And some rest!)...Anyway take care. Thanks for posting.
Yeah it's been a long time since I'm woken up not at least a little anxious. Sometimes it's really bad (especially when I have bad dreams, which is most of the time), sometimes it's just uncomfortable. As a kid I used to be able to spring out of bed with a totally joyful and carefree attitude, feeling really positive about being alive. But nowadays, I take note of the days when I do feel really refreshed, happy and at peace when I wake up because they are so rare. I.e. how most normal feel everyday.
We're not made of "stone." (Or concrete or asphalt etc.).. We're flesh and blood human beings with a wide-range of emotions...Parents who punish their kids for crying are basically saying: "Pretend that you are made of 'stone' and 'hollow' inside. Act like a robot. 'Stuff' your feelings and keep your mouth 'zipped-up' so I don't have to bother with you. No 'blubbering' allowed!"...Without an "outlet" and some "instructions" about how to handle and process their feelings kids are at a "loss." They enter adulthood in a "handicapped state" and this is sad...Parents teach their kids how to master tying their shoes or using a fork and knife to eat...Parents teach their kids how to do many different things as they grow older. But what about feelings? Where are kids suppose to learn how to process their feelings?...What happens if Johnny or Sue comes home with "hurt feelings" because their best friend "dumped" them? Are they suppose to pretend that they are made of "stone" and don't feel "hurt?" (To "please" their parents and avoid being labeled a "sissy?")...Parents need to be available to guide their kids through "emotional problems" too. Adult life is full of "ups" and "downs" and "hurts" and disappointments and "you name it!" And kids need to learn how to deal with all facets of life when they become adult themselves.
Trimac20...I hope things get better for you soon. It's hard to deal with "ongoing trauma." (Where we don't feel a sense of "control" over things.)...My younger son has been given less than a year to live. (Due to cancerous brain tumors that keep growing back.)...We both try to stay strong and positive and hopeful! (This is our basic nature!) But there are times when we need to cry and let our (other) emotions come out to avoid "cracking-up!")...If we don't have a guaranteed "positive outcome" in sight things can be rough at times. Don't you think?....Anyway I hope we both have "smooth sailing" and "better times" ahead! Sorry that you are going through some "rough seas" now too.
stan4...I've been around a few women who used their tears and crying as a manipulation tactic. (Not many men though.)...But I've been around men who use pouting and sulking and "shut-down moods" as a "revenge" or manipulation tactic...Or men or women who raise their voice and try to act "tough" and intimidating in order to "win" and gain their "own way."...I'm not a fan of any kind of manipulation tactics or "games" in general...This is "kid stuff" versus trying to resolve problems and cope with life in more "adult ways." Don't you think?
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