Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have had 2 near death experiences, one at age 5 when I nearly drowned. Instead of making me fear death, what has occurred is that I learned early on that life was finite and when it was my time to go - that was that. The only thing I think about in re: to my mortality is that I want to stay on this planet as long as I can in order to be supportive to my family. Other than that, I have no regrets, live each day knowing full well anything can happen to any of us at any time . . . so I love well, laugh a lot and treasure the good memories . . . I know that whether I wake up (or die in an accident) . . . the sun will still rise the next day and life will go on for others on this planet. I don't worry about being missed or leaving a legacy. My thoughts are - I have no conscious memory of what form I existed in before birth . . . so . . . whatever comes next, fine with me.
As far as feeling I have not accomplished everything I wished to accomplish . . . there aren't many things I DID accomplish that mattered that much, all things considered - save one thing - raising a family. I don't want them to miss me - I just want them to have something of value imparted to them - a philosophy, an insight, a bit of wisdom - that will be meaningful after I am gone. Everything else - the material side of life - is all fluff.
You are very wise. I agree with you on the material side of life but I am waking up to my actual destiny (or trying to) . . .
I was just thinking that I can waste a lot of time . . . and I have to constantly remind myself that time is not unlimited. If I want to get things done, I need to be more disciplined.
Many of us will be dead in twenty years, give or take ten or more years . . . I am not saying this to be morbid . . .I personally think it is healthy to not be in denial about death and its certainty. I know most people prefer not to think about it . . . Buddhists say when you are sick, "practice" dying . . .so you will get used to the idea . . .
Anyway, do you think about your imminent death or do you prefer not to think about it?
Unlike some others, I think this is a worthwhile post and topic.
A wise man running once started a group discussion by posing the question, "What would you do differently if you knew you were dying?"
People responded by saying they would repair relationships with those formerly close to them, or go places they had always wanted to see, or experience things they had always wanted to experience, and many other interesting life goals.
The wise man then said, "I've got news for you: every one of us is dying."
It is not morbid. It is a way to put more life into your life. In my mid-50's, I know I am not what I was when I was 17--and neither is my bride. But I can look at her and see the beautiful girl she was, just as I can see the beautiful old lady I hope she has the chance to become. Circle of life, and all that.
You are very wise. I agree with you on the material side of life but I am waking up to my actual destiny (or trying to) . . .
Ah . . . the "reason for being alive" . . . destiny seems to predispose us to a path that we did not consciously choose. Mission, yes . . . destiny . . . not so much.
It is not some singular thing we do (write the definitive Southern novel, win the Nobel Peace Prize, amass a fortune, discover a new planet) . . . or even a collection of our life's work that equals our mission here on this planet. Most of us will never do anything very extraordinary at all in our lives (when measured on the Nobel Prize scale, lol).
Our mission is to be the best people we can be, in whatever context we have been given. Do what we do the best we can do it, whether what we do is create new forumulae for pharmaceuticals or wash dishes, and do those things with grace and dignity. Honor the dignity of the others we come into contact with . . . whether in our careers or while shopping at the grocery store.
"Love your neighbor as yourself." Set a good example for those around us. That's it. Do your best - and if you have always done your best, been the best person you can be . . . then you have fulfilled your destiny. We do not know how our actions affect the others w/ whom we come into contact. What may seem unnoticeable can actually be profound to someome else.
Few of us will die knowing why we were put on this planet at this specific time. Our lives are lived w/o knowing the repercussions of even the small things we do . . . we may have been put here to simply be part of a larger "chain reaction" of life events.
And few things we actually "accomplish" have much meaning to the rest of the world . . . most of us are not Jonas Salk. Most of what we feel are important accomplishments in our lives are actually ego-driven pursuits, and have nothing to do with "destiny."
To think otherwise is to espouse that some folks are destined to poverty, pain and suffering - and freewill has no meaning.
Next year possibly I will hit that number. I guess I'll quit buying green bananas then.
If I make it to 75 all bets are off. I'm going to eat and drink anything I want.
To be honest my cut off date is 70.. Line up the shots and sit a 25 year old tramp next to me just for grins.. Maybe once the drinks kick in at some point she will call me a dirty old man..Anything after that will be a bonus.
If I make it to 75 all bets are off. I'm going to eat and drink anything I want.
To be honest my cut off date is 70.. Line up the shots and sit a 25 year old tramp next to me just for grins.. Maybe once the drinks kick in at some point she will call me a dirty old man..Anything after that will be a bonus.
It occurs to me that 20 years from now I'll be 85 and have a 50-50 chance of not realizing it. If I make it, I might not care. If I don't, I certainly won't care.
The average age at death of men in my family is 71. That's also the age at which my father died. If I follow the pattern I have six years left. But I refuse to live them frantically as if I'm going to die then. I enjoy our peaceful and satisfying life too much for that. When the time comes, it comes. That's all!
I still find this thread maudlin, unfortunate, unnecessary and unpleasant.
We taught our children that death was a part of life when they were very young. To deny it, or to say, "No, you can't go to Grammy's funeral because you won't understand!" is protecting children from the truth that everything and everyone dies. And that isn't fair. Moreover - like sex or anything else - if you deny that it can happen, and try to convince them that it is nothing for them to think about, then they WILL think about it, go out and get misinformation, or become morbidly curious, or develop strange attractions to it.
My kids learned about death from their environment; they learned that dying things often feed other things, that sometimes death is violent and unplanned, that sometimes it is a blessed relief from pain. We taught all of them this, from not just the plants and animals we raised, but by hunting and fishing and listening to their Dad's and my stories from working in EMS. From learning about death they learned that life matters, that what part every living thing plays is important to someone or something... even if it is just beetles and worms. Death is a part of life; a whole part, not just an addendum or a whoopsie. All of my adult children are now realists - they experience life to the best of their ability, take chances, love passionately, challenge accepted "truths", work hard, play hard, read and write and experience everything that they can, and are not afraid to go after whatever it is that they want with all of their might.
Ah . . . the "reason for being alive" . . . destiny seems to predispose us to a path that we did not consciously choose. Mission, yes . . . destiny . . . not so much.
It is not some singular thing we do (write the definitive Southern novel, win the Nobel Peace Prize, amass a fortune, discover a new planet) . . . or even a collection of our life's work that equals our mission here on this planet. Most of us will never do anything very extraordinary at all in our lives (when measured on the Nobel Prize scale, lol).
Our mission is to be the best people we can be, in whatever context we have been given. Do what we do the best we can do it, whether what we do is create new forumulae for pharmaceuticals or wash dishes, and do those things with grace and dignity. Honor the dignity of the others we come into contact with . . . whether in our careers or while shopping at the grocery store.
"Love your neighbor as yourself." Set a good example for those around us. That's it. Do your best - and if you have always done your best, been the best person you can be . . . then you have fulfilled your destiny. We do not know how our actions affect the others w/ whom we come into contact. What may seem unnoticeable can actually be profound to someome else.
Few of us will die knowing why we were put on this planet at this specific time. Our lives are lived w/o knowing the repercussions of even the small things we do . . . we may have been put here to simply be part of a larger "chain reaction" of life events.
And few things we actually "accomplish" have much meaning to the rest of the world . . . most of us are not Jonas Salk. Most of what we feel are important accomplishments in our lives are actually ego-driven pursuits, and have nothing to do with "destiny."
To think otherwise is to espouse that some folks are destined to poverty, pain and suffering - and freewill has no meaning.
When I used the word "destiny" I was not using it in the usual way, i.e., fate, etc. I was speaking of "my path," which I believe is unique, as all of ours are . . .
This is very much in the realm of personal beliefs, so everyone is going to have different perspectives. Mine is that I have a purpose on Earth . . .a "destiny" fulfill - this has nothing to do with lack of free will and everything to do with me discovering what my particular purpose is and living it the best I can. That is what I meant.
It is up to every person to distinguish between ego-driven pursuits and behaviors and acts that contribute towards their purpose in life . . . I don't think anyone can judge another's purpose and determine if it is ego-driven or not . . . that is not their business, and is up to the individual to determine.
Last edited by imcurious; 09-11-2011 at 05:12 PM..
Many people are resolved to death as they get older and they accept it's finality and inevitability. I've seen some folks "rage" against their death and I've seen some die very peacefully. We just buried my brother-in-law last weekend and he was one who went with much pain but with a faint smile on his face.
My thought is that the end of life is simply the end of the Valley of the Shadow of Death. For many folks death is simply the beginning of an eternal life where the valley of shadows and death will no longer have to be traveled.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
