What age do you start talking to your children about drugs and substance abuse ? (legal, teens)

[sasha77]

What do you tell them ?
What do you do to provide a foundation to protect them against falling into one of these things
Did it work ?

I don't remember my parents talking to me about smoking/alcohol or drugs, I did not AVOID drugs on purpose, just did not present an opportunity. so it was sheer dumb luck that i did not end up like a couple of my friends did- dead.

[TXNGL]

Originally Posted by sasha77

What do you tell them ?
What do you do to provide a foundation to protect them against falling into one of these things
Did it work ?

I don't remember my parents talking to me about smoking/alcohol or drugs, I did not seek it out on purpose. so it was sheer dumb luck that i did not end up like a couple of my friends did- dead.

Early. Had no choice. My daughter, at the tender age of 7 or 8, watched a 5th grader marched out of her elementary school by the police. He had been attempting to sell "cheese" (heroin). Is that sad or what?

[sasha77]

Do you mind sharing the details of your talk ? What did you say ?

[mainebrokerman]

Originally Posted by TXNGL

Early. Had no choice. My daughter, at the tender age of 7 or 8, watched a 5th grader marched out of her elementary school by the police. He had been attempting to sell "cheese" (heroin). Is that sad or what?

it is sad,,,but you are right,,,take the opportunity


however, as your child gets older early , to midteens,,,take the mystery/allure out of substances

when I was 14-15 at a family gathering one of my uncles saw us trying to steal an adult drink,,,he came over,,and said ,,here,,, have my beer (knowing we wouldn't like it) but I took a big drink and spit it out as did my cousin,,,,
that took any and all mystery out of alcohol away from us for quite a while

when my son was younger in his teens,,id let him try a couple drinks a sip, most things he didn't like,,
so when the time came -under peer pressure to drink, he didn't take it - ironically, it was more the
kids that had very strict parents....you see this when kids go to college- the kids that had very strict parents,,,they went nuts, partying and drinking..
im not advocating,,,,giving alcohol to kids, or not being strict,,,,
just try to avoid it being a big mystery

the best gift a parent can give a kid, is confidence, then they make far better decisions
most drinking, drugs are an escape from who they are

poor parenting, and poor role models are destructive for kids- also, on the other extreme, you cant smother kids, because natural curiosity is part of being a teen


my son is now a responsible 21 yr old adult,, I was lucky, I did not have one issue with drugs or alcohol with him in high school, sadly, he could see firsthand how destructive it was when his peers were taking/using them

[monumentus]

Pretty much from the moment they can talk and understand speech is when I start. That is when you start to explain to them what drugs are - how to recognise them in the house - never to eat them - that the wrong thing in their body at the wrong time can cause all kinds of horrible problems - and so forth.

And then you build on this over the years up to and including the teens from there.

[Girl]

My children are the ones that lecture us about drinking. They are 9 and 11. When we go out to restaurants, my son will turn to my husband if he orders a second beer and say, "Dada, one is enough." And when I order a cocktail, I'll offer him the fruit from the rim and he'll make a face and say, "I don't want something that has touched ALCOHOL."

When they were very young, I intended on eventually having "the talk" with them, but their elementary school has had regular "anti-" programs over the years and it has pretty much indoctrinated my children to hate drugs, smoking and alcohol.

I'm not stupid, though. I know at SOME point they'll be curious about the taste of alcohol. And I have no qualms about letting them take a sip of the nastiest beer out there if only to make them decide they don't want it (which is what happened to me).

[lkb0714]

Originally Posted by sasha77

What do you tell them ?
What do you do to provide a foundation to protect them against falling into one of these things
Did it work ?

I don't remember my parents talking to me about smoking/alcohol or drugs, I did not AVOID drugs on purpose, just did not present an opportunity. so it was sheer dumb luck that i did not end up like a couple of my friends did- dead.

Very very young. I think my daughter was a kindergartner, maybe a little younger, the first time I remember talking about drugs with her. We went into the city to see a show and we met a homeless woman in the train station bathroom asking for money. She asked me what the woman wanted money for (she was clearly a junkie) and I told her it was probably for drugs. We then talked about drugs a little bit. That drugs are something that at first make you feel good but than make you very sick, and that some people wanted to feel good so badly they didn't care about being sick. She asked me how sick they got and I was honest and told her that frequently they died.

That was the end of that conversation but I couldn't count the number of times we talked about it after that. When she was young tv was a great way to talk about those things.

[Meyerland]

I started at age 3-4 and talked about if you find pills or something you think might be candy. My daughter was really good and would even show me a gummy bear her friend gave her to see if it was candy.

Then it progressed to teaching her about how medicine is good and bad, and you have to be careful and only take what is recommended and safe. Only mommy, daddy, a doctor, a nurse, and grandparents can give you medicine.

At around age 6 I started to teach her about the difference between legal and illegal drugs. I taught her that cigarettes and alcohol are not legal for children because their brains and bodies are still forming. Later around age 8 I went into how people can die from alcohol poisoning or emphysema. We have family members that died from both of those.

At age 8-9 I talked about why some people do illegal drugs, because it temporarily feels good or it numbs their pain. Then I talked about how that good feeling goes away and people can become addicted. I also said that people in our family become addicted and the drug becomes the most important thing in their lives. More important than friends, family, or their health.

We have started practicing saying no thanks in a light and non judge mental way. It's how I got out of doing drugs when I was in school.

This may be more than most people say to their kids, but knowing my family history I am not leaving things to chance.

[Mike623]

I told my children as soon as they could understand the words that were coming out of my mouth, but really, around 4 or 5 years old because of growing up in a major city but I realize, that isn't the only place drugs happen,but I guess it worked, all my children have always come to me with anything and now that they are all grown, they still tell me that they haven't tried anything harder then pot, and they are teaching their children at the same age, I showed them as they got older, tapes of what I recorded from the streets of what drugs did to people, I also moved us all to the burbs, not much better, just not so in your face.

[denverian]

My kids are 6 and so far the only talke we've had was about cigarettes. They don't see people smoking very often (no one in our family or neighborhood smokes) but they've seen it now and then out in public.

One of my boys saw a woman smoking in a car and said, "maybe she just hates her life and wants to kill herself with cigarettes" lol.