What age do you start talking to your children about drugs and substance abuse ?
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At 4 years old we started with the basics. I am on too many meds that look like candy for my kids not to know that something they find on the floor of my bathroom could kill them.
For me the secret is to be honest with your kids about drugs. I've seen too many parents lie to their kids telling them that drugs are bad m'kay. They say that every aspect of drugs are bad, that they feel bad, they hurt people, etc.
We've been honest in saying that some drugs will make you feel like you are having the best day of your life.. like you got the best happy meal prize, had your own birthday party, got every present you wanted. etc. But then tell them the truth that when the drug wears off, that's when the bad comes in.
Too many kids get a blanket no instead of honest answers. We explained to our kids when they were young using very simple terms and stayed ahead of the curve as they got older. We never had a problem, although we know that our kids likely tried alchohol and drugs before graduating. Today when a single dose of many drugs can kill even with a single dose, luck plays a big part, but smart parenting can lessen the risk considerably.
At 4 years old we started with the basics. I am on too many meds that look like candy for my kids not to know that something they find on the floor of my bathroom could kill them.
For me the secret is to be honest with your kids about drugs. I've seen too many parents lie to their kids telling them that drugs are bad m'kay. They say that every aspect of drugs are bad, that they feel bad, they hurt people, etc.
We've been honest in saying that some drugs will make you feel like you are having the best day of your life.. like you got the best happy meal prize, had your own birthday party, got every present you wanted. etc. But then tell them the truth that when the drug wears off, that's when the bad comes in.
Too many kids get a blanket no instead of honest answers. We explained to our kids when they were young using very simple terms and stayed ahead of the curve as they got older. We never had a problem, although we know that our kids likely tried alchohol and drugs before graduating. Today when a single dose of many drugs can kill even with a single dose, luck plays a big part, but smart parenting can lessen the risk considerably.
You are very smart. In my talks with my daughter I was telling her that I had tried pot and that I found it disgusting, hated the way it felt on my lungs, how I coughed, how I felt. My husband pointed out that I would lose credibility, because many people find it pleasurable to smoke. He suggested I not make it into this monstrous thing, but rather be honest about why it's popular and why it can be very bad for you. That makes more sense when you think about it.
You are very smart. In my talks with my daughter I was telling her that I had tried pot and that I found it disgusting, hated the way it felt on my lungs, how I coughed, how I felt. My husband pointed out that I would lose credibility, because many people find it pleasurable to smoke. He suggested I not make it into this monstrous thing, but rather be honest about why it's popular and why it can be very bad for you. That makes more sense when you think about it.
Children are much smarter than we give them credit for, and if you give them the reasons for your rules and are honest, it seems to work much more effectively. But I will always add that all kids are different. There isn't a one size fits all parenting technique. We never had to spank our kids even once, and in general I am against spanking. But there are children and situations that I definitely can understand how it would be an effective tool to stop bad behavior or a tren edeveo
I really think that having forums like this is an amazing advancement in parenting. You can get near real time advice from many people who care and are in the same situation you are in. You can see what you like and dislike or compare how your child is acting in comparison to someone else's child. There is nothing worse than getting advice from a child psychologist that has never had any children
So you never use prescription medications? You never take any over the counter medications like tylenol?
Nope. Nothing -- but I'm not against antibiotics -- but I haven't needed those since I was in high school with a strep infection. I have no pain so I don't need pain killers. Right now the only medications in my house are heartworm tablets and some frontline -- but that's not for any humans.
I have never given my kids tylenol or aspirin or anything like that. If they complain of a headache which is very rarely, I told them they should lay down and take a nap.
Nope. Nothing -- but I'm not against antibiotics -- but I haven't needed those since I was in high school with a strep infection. I have no pain so I don't need pain killers. Right now the only medications in my house are heartworm tablets and some frontline -- but that's not for any humans.
I have never given my kids tylenol or aspirin or anything like that. If they complain of a headache which is very rarely, I told them they should lay down and take a nap.
Tylenol is also used for fever. Now, if your kids never have had a fever that required medication, you are quite unusual.
I think that trying to paint all drugs as bad, you do a disservice to kids since we sometimes do need medications for illness. Also, alcohol, imo, is worse than pot and kids discover at some point that painting all drugs as evil is not truthful.
Even Tylenol is dangerous, Vicodin pills now only have 325mg of acetaminophen instead of 500 because of the dangers of doses that high.
Talking to young kids about drugs is all fine and good but once they get to be teenagers, 7th grade through high school, they care more about what their friends think and fitting in and being one of the cool kids and their parents only hold them back and don't know anything.
I have not read the entire thread, so please excuse me if this has already been stated. Addiction runs in my family on both sides. My husband and I both know that their are certain things that we must stay away from in order to not develop a problem. As soon as my son is old enough to understand, we will explain to him about the dangers of drugs and alcohol. When he is old enough to understand we will be open and honest about both my husband and my families histories with addiction. I can't give the OP a specific age because I don't know when he will be ready to understand certain concepts, but the initial stay away from drugs and alcohol will most likely be early. Of course I think this will be based on his maturity level at the time. Plus, he's only 19 months old, so we have plenty of time to formulate a plan.
What do you tell them ?
What do you do to provide a foundation to protect them against falling into one of these things
Did it work ?
I don't remember my parents talking to me about smoking/alcohol or drugs, I did not AVOID drugs on purpose, just did not present an opportunity. so it was sheer dumb luck that i did not end up like a couple of my friends did- dead.
My mother smokes, and everyone we know drinks both coffee and alcohol, so we introduced the idea of addiction, drugs, and good/bad choices very early on, probably as soon as they could ask if they could have some coffee (since mommy is always drinking it).
We talk about drugs often: alcohol, caffeine, nicotine are the big ones, but we also talk about marijuana (it's legal here), and the really addictive drugs that can take over a person's whole personality (alcohol included). Children's Tylenol is a drug. We talk about addiction and drugs separately and together. Some foods can be addictive. Some behaviors can be addictive. Not all drugs are addictive. But many are.
No secrets. No romance. Just drugs, the ugly parts and the fun parts, as they are, and as we do them. I drink alcohol and caffeine and I consider sugar a kind of drug as well--weak, but a drug, if you must classify things as drugs. I've smoked weed but then didn't and now that it's legal I haven't had the chance.
They know that most drugs feel good for awhile because otherwise who would do it? And I don't want a drug-free life for them. Take the damn Tylenol. Have a glass of champagne at your wedding. Enjoy it. But heroin, don't ****ing touch it because it can eat you alive like nothing else.
I'm going to try to get my parents, who definitely had run-ins with drugs, and my neighbor, give my kids the talk about withdrawals and the bad sides of hard drugs.
We mainly tell them that we want their brains and endocrine systems to get more or less developed before they have caffeine or alcohol, so NO they can't have any, and besides, we respect the law in this house.
I just try to give them information and remember there are no guarantees in parenting. I hope my kids never get into hard drugs but I'm not going to pretend I can control their fates. They live their own lives--hopefully long ones.
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Now, if your kids never have had a fever that required medication, you are quite unusual.
You know what's funny--I don't get fevers that require medication, and this runs in my family. It might be unusual but there are such people and it must be genetic. I don't think I took a Tylenol until I broke my arm when I was nearly 10. I'm not saying I don't get sick. But I really don't get fevers, and neither does one of my children. She's never had a fever and she's five!
Such good advice from all posters, although I would draw the line on giving a child a "taste", only because I don't really see the value of that.
Definitely get the dialogue going way before middle school (age 11 or so). So much peer pressure & a real jungle, be it urban, rural or the 'burbs.
I thought it would be a deterrent, the single taste.
It was, for the older one. The little one loves it. No wonder--she looks like the side of the family that is prone to alcoholism. (I did not drink during my pregnancy with her.)
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