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I wasn't there either but I can say this. The parents are adults and they determine what happens in their home. If they wanted to "talk her down," then they could have done it.
Maybe the point is that they didn't want to. Talking a kid down can be more exhausting then listening (or in this case mocking) their behavior. There are times when my son is in a tiff and I just let him go at it. Case in point, the stupid donut fiasco. It was late. I was tired. I knew he was tired. When he started his little tantrum, I could have gone in his room, demanded he stopped screaming, made him calm down and go to bed.
I chose not to. You can't hear him from outside unless you're standing in our yard and the screaming didn't bother me. I ignore him completely. If you want to act like a big brat, do it alone in your room. I don't have the time or energy to fight every battle.
I find it degrading to mimic a child when they are in the middle of a tantrum or when just crying, even if for manipulation. It usually only makes them more angry too. How would you feel if you *FELT* like everything around you was out of control and then someone laughs at you or mimics you.
I have a different perspective as I have a 7 year old who has thrown some major meltdowns over the years. Talking her down was not a possibility as the end result was usually 4 hours later, she and I have both acted in ways neither of us are proud of. By not engaging her, it is much quicker to come to a halt. Some kids are a bit more strong willed than others. Talking to a child who is upset and throwing a typical tantrum is one thing, but I define meltdown and tantrum in completely different categories.
The only reason I find this video acceptable is because she could not see that the father was doing this, nor that her brothers saw him. I can only imagine she felt crappy when they were laughing at her despair though.
Could come in handy to use youtube to show your own kid what another kid screaming in a tantrum looks like.. then they wouldn't be so upset feeling they are being made fun of, but at the same time they might 'get' how they look when they throw one.
Not sure how I feel about this particular video. I won't comment on it either way.
I wasn't there either but I can say this. The parents are adults and they determine what happens in their home. If they wanted to "talk her down," then they could have done it.
It sounds so right and proper And I would have agreed with you whole-heartedly... 10 years ago
Quote:
Originally Posted by charlygal
Exactly. The parents have taught the child that she can get away with stuff like screaming for an hour.
So, ahem... let's say they "don't allow it" - and, when the kid is in the midst of a tantrum, there is NO logic reasoning, btw. They might not even hear you. Exactly HOW would you not allow? Tape her mouth? Because that's about the only thing that would have helped, in some cases, "to not allow".
I find it degrading to mimic a child when they are in the middle of a tantrum or when just crying, even if for manipulation. It usually only makes them more angry too. How would you feel if you *FELT* like everything around you was out of control and then someone laughs at you or mimics you.
I have a different perspective as I have a 7 year old who has thrown some major meltdowns over the years. Talking her down was not a possibility as the end result was usually 4 hours later, she and I have both acted in ways neither of us are proud of. By not engaging her, it is much quicker to come to a halt. Some kids are a bit more strong willed than others. Talking to a child who is upset and throwing a typical tantrum is one thing, but I define meltdown and tantrum in completely different categories.
I agree with the bolded part of your post. I typically ignore my son when he goes into meltdown mode. It's not worth the energy to try to get him to calm down and usually I end up yelling. When he's having a tantrum I do make fun of him. I mimic him and cry and stop my feet and yell. Then he stops and looks at me like I'm crazy. Once he said to me "It hurts my feelings when you laugh at me" and I told him "well how do you think I feel listening to you scream at me?"
I have a video when he's about 4 and sometimes when I can feel a tantrum coming on I'll play the video and sit and laugh at it. He won't watch the video but it usually stops the behavior because he's remembering what he looked like rolling on the floor wailing away about nothing while I laughed at him.
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And I would have agreed with you whole-heartedly... 10 years ago 
Because that's about the only thing that would have helped, in some cases, "to not allow".
