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My mom had raised us (me and 1 sister)by herself since I was 14 and my dad died, he was an ass and my life was better without him, as horrible as that might sound. My mom said something to me when I was a junior in high school that has been how I try to live life. She told me to have fun. She didn't care what i did in life but to have fun with it. She said we only have a short time here and make the best of it. So I did that, I try to have fun no matter what I am doing, and never took a job that I didn't like. Well some jobs I have liked more than others lol
What a wise woman your Mom was!!!!!!!
LOL.....and I can tell your living your Mom's words by driving the SVT truck!!!!!!!!!!!!
Had one years ago and loved it. DH always regretted selling it! They need to start up production again!
What a wise woman your Mom was!!!!!!!
LOL.....and I can tell your living your Mom's words by driving the SVT truck!!!!!!!!!!!!
Had one years ago and loved it. DH always regretted selling it! They need to start up production again!
I drive it like I stole it everyday! Where I work, the guards ask me to light up the tires when I leave lol
Yeah i do live up to her words, it does make this crazy world a better place to live in when you are having fun along the way thats for sure.
Location: Finally made it to Florida and lovin' every minute!
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SVT, thank you for sharing your touching story. Your mom is with you now, I'm sure you're aware of her now and again. Don't let them tell you you were wrong in having them give her the meds. It wasn't that which killed her, but the cancer.
SVT, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your mother. I try to raise my son right and I feel I would have done my job and he'll love me as well with the amount of care he'll show me when I am at the end of the road (far off yet). I think she has done a great job with you. My condolences to you and your sister; for what it's worth, this has brought you closer together as a family.
My mom died in June and it has really made me miss her so much.
She had cancer a few years ago, she beat the cancer and was okay, but somewhere along the line her liver was damaged. She had been in and out of the hospital for a few months before she died. My sister is in the navy medical field, not a full dr, hard to explain I guess, but she would talk to moms Dr's and then call me and tell me what was going on. She talked to the dr on a wednesday and called and told me that they said mom only has a few months to live at best. We called mom on thursday night and talked to her on a 3 way call. mom loved that when she could talk to us both at the same time. We told her that I would come and get her and her stuff the next week and take her to my sisters house. my sis could take much better care of her, and she did not want to die in the hospital. She didnt really want to do that, but she finally agreed.
I called her the next day to talk to her and they said she couldnt come to the phone. I didn't know it at the time but my mom was unresponsive and going fast. My sis called later that day and said that she talked to the dr and mom would not live through the weekend. I drove all night to get there, I met my sister on the interstate and we got to moms hospital at 9am saturday. When i went in it really broke my heart, she was jaundiced really bad and looked brownish colored, and while her eyes were open she had no recognition of us, and no reaction that we were there. we both start crying seeing my mom who raised us by herself and was always so strong for us and here she was laying there helpless and didnt know we were there.
My sister had a new baby in april, she took the baby to see my mom for a week in may, my mom loved her so much, she rocked her everyday she was there, and we have a few pictures of that at least. when sis was pregnant and even after the baby was born we always did 3 way calls and talked about it. So i held the baby up in front of my mom and my sister was telling her that she was there. My mom started crying. She knew we were there even though she couldnt do anything about it. about that time the baby pooped and scared me and we laughed about that, I am sure my mom was laughing at me too. At least she knew we were there. We felt much better at that point, because even though she was not reacting to us, we knew that she knew we were there for her.
She had been having muscle spasms and im sure she had some pain because once in a while she would moan when it was close to the time for her next shots. Sometimes her legs would jerk around because of the spams but they assured us this was normal.
later that day when it was getting close to time for her next shot, she started jerking around and kicking. To be honest it really scared my sister and I. This went on for about 30 seconds (it seemed like much longer) and then she tried to talk. She managed to say 2 words, "love both". I'm a 42 year old man and I was crying like a baby when she did that. She fought through whatever fog she was in and managed to say those last words to us. She never spoke again, nor did we have any indication that she knew we were there. I know in my heart that she knew we were there and I feel so much better that she knew her kids were there for her at the end.
I went to a hotel close by to get some sleep. Some of my cousins and an aunt had come to the hospital so I knew mom was not alone. My sister soon showed up and claimed the other bed and we finally slept. I woke up around 9pm. Since sis had the baby I went on back to the hospital myself. When I got there my aunt and 1 cousins went home and left me with 2 other cousins. We sat there by my moms bed telling stories of growing up, the family gatherings, and laughing the whole time. I am sure my mom was laying there listening and laughing with us. She would not have wanted us to sit there crying and sad.
My cousins stayed until about 3am and I am so glad to have had that time with them. The nurse came in around 3:30 and took moms blood pressure. I want to say it was something like 60 over 20. I am not exactly sure what the numbers were but it was something like that, lower than I have ever heard of I remembered. THey didn't want to give mom any pain medicine because they were afraid with her BP so low that it would put her over. I called my sis and she showed up about 15 minutes later. She spoke to the nurses and they explained what was going on. I guess a shift change occured around 4, because a different nurse came in at 4:15 and closed the door. She explained that she could give our mom more medicine if we chose, but we had to be aware of what could happen. I think we both said yes give her the medicine at the same time. We had already said our goodbyes and we knew that she was not going to walk out of that hospital. We told her that her parents were waiting for her at a card table, she loved to play rook! The nurse gave her the medicine and moms spasms stopped again. This was about 4:30am. She ended up getting more medicine at 8am, still hanging on. I fell asleep in the chair holding her hand around 9, and my sis woke me up at 10 because she was going to go get us something to eat. I sat up still holding moms hand when sis left. About 2 minutes later her breathing changed. I knew it was time, I called my sis on her cell phone with one hand while I held moms hand in the other, I told her to get back here. About a minute before my sis came back in my mom passed away. It was very peaceful when she did. I am glad I was there for her. I sat there still holding her hand for a long time afterwards.
I still think of her everyday, and still have to stop myself from picking up the phone to call her like I used to. I will always miss her, but I am so glad that we were there for her, and that she knew we were there. What more can a family ask for when that time comes?
Some people have questioned us about allowing her to get the pain medicine knowing it might have been what caused her to die, but we looked at it as the end of her suffering, not the cause of her death, that was determined way back when her liver failed. i wouldnt do anything over again, but I would give everything I had to have 5 minutes with her again talking to us.
I will never know the words to take your pain away,SVTLightning
If I did,I would take it away from me,for I have lost too. But just stay strong and think of only the good times.
Love
Okie
I will never know the words to take your pain away,SVTLightning
If I did,I would take it away from me,for I have lost too. But just stay strong and think of only the good times.
Love
Okie
Thanks, I don't expect anyone to have words to take anything away, but writing it down and sharing helps a little.
I do think of the good times, we had a rough life and my mom did the best she could. I was in the navy and did great for myself, have a career now that pays me great money with little effort, and my sis is staying the full 20 in the navy and will be done in just over a year. She was very proud of us, and we are very proud of her to help us get were we are today.
I'll share a funny story about my mom.
I was stationed in Va beach, my sister was doing a 6 month tour in Antarctica. I had 2 lines on my phone(this was before 3 way calling was big) and one day my sis called. I told her hang on, my phone could conference in the other line so I called my mom, I told her "hang on mom, I have a girl on the phone from antarctica" her reply was "thats neat, does she know melissa?" (my sister) haha
We were talking about money one day when I was stationed at an air force base for school. The AF charged me 7 dollars a day to stay on base in the dorms there. SO when we were talking and going over my bills I said 100 in credit cards, 250 for my car payment and 210 a month to stay on base. "210 a month!!! she said...I thought you said it was only 7 dollars a day!" lol We laughed about that for years!
Though not the brightest, I will always love my mom!
All of your stories made me cry too.
I miss my Mom and Dad a big bunch. I was with them both when they passed. They are always with me in spirit now. I'm so glad I was with them and with my MIL too when she passed from leukemia.
This is why family is so important.......because we don't have our loved ones forever.
For some reason, we kind of think that we will........then reality hits.
More important then any material thing on earth..........is my family.
I'll never truely miss my house, my car, or any jewels.........
What I would totally miss is all my girls faces...and those little fellows too!
Your families were blessed to have you all .......for sure.
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