Why is life stressful in the DC/nova area? (Arlington: foreclosed, rent)

[vishnu111]

I've been reading this over and over again that the DC area is highly stressful. I don't get this.. why would this area be any different for me and my family. (me, wife and 1st grader)

I plan to get up in the morning, walk to the metro station.. take the train into DC.. walk a few minutes.. go to work.
(I pretty much got it planned out..move close to metro.. that is..)

Do you guys mean that the work will be stressful with pulling crazy hours like 50-60 a week? Cause I'm sure I'm landing a gov job.. I've got several options. In CA, gov jobs are pretty kick back. In all honestly people make good pay (in CA) and work maybe 35-40 hours tops in Gov.. unless you got a Moderator cut: Inappropriate language for a boss.

Would it be stressful for just me or my wife and kid?

Please explain. If metro breaking down once in a while is the cause of stress, I could probably handle that once or twice every few years or so.

[Caladium]

Oh look,it's vishnu. The guy who starts thread after thread wondering if he should move here because he's heard he should be alarmed about mosquitoes, temps that go over 90 degrees, tornadoes, hurricanes, cyclones, flooding, damage to his car from the winter snows, etc. So I take it this is the newest thing to dread?

Maybe you should give us links to some of the posts that gave you the impression life here is stressful, and then we can give a little insight as to why that particular poster said what he said. Meanwhile, FWIW, I don't find life here stressful at all. The most stressful thing that happened to me today was the weather was gorgeous but I had to go to work. And then some limo going to Trump's golf course was slow going down Lowes Island Blvd. But, you know what they say--life in the suburbs isn't for everyone. If you hate the burbs (as you've said you do) then Northern VA isn't for you.

[michgc]

It's stressful because there are so many people here. And it is expensive. And you are surrounded by high-achievers. This is how life works in NoVA:

--You walk to the Metro. Put your card in the slot. It doesn't work. Watch two trains go by while the Metro guy helps you fix it. Rush down the escalator. Lots of people waiting on a train. Darn! Will you be able to get a seat? Train finally comes. You rush in. You're new around here, so you let the pregnant lady get the last seat, leaving you to stand for a 20 minute-ride. Wait. What's that smell? Did the guy squished up against you even brush his teeth this morning. Ding Dong. Train conductor comes over the loudspeaker. "We will be delayed in East Falls Church for a few extra minutes." Finally get to your station downtown, only a few minutes behind. You start running. Darn! The escalators are out, and you have to walk up an extremely steep escalator. Well, at least the air conditioning worked on the train today, unlike yesterday afternoon's sweltering ride. You run to work, passing a few homeless people - the same ones you see everyday. Amazing, the contrast between them and the rich and powerful just a few blocks away at the Capitol. You shake your head in amazement.

--Works over. Metro ride home is smooth. You decide to go to the supermarket after work. First your 20 minute walk home. Get bitten by a few mosquitoes. Change your clothes. Then get in your car. Fortunately, the market is only 2 miles away. Unfortunately, it's rush hour and it takes 10 minutes to get there. You sit through 3 iterations of the light on Nutley street. Then you cannot find a parking spot close to the entrance, so you park pretty far away. Then you get inside and go to the deli counter, only to find there are 8 people ahead of you. You buy an overpriced convenience meal because you don't have time to cook. You realize you left your environmentally-friendly grocery bags in your car, but don't feel like getting them because you parked so far away and you're tired of walking anyway, since you walk to the Metro each day. You get home, eat with your wife and kid and then head out the door to drive your son to his Cub Scout meeting. You get there and the guy in charge asks you to be a leader. It's a great way to meet the other parents and some of your son's new classmates, so you agree. You learn at the meeting that there will be a required training next weekend. And a campout the following weekend. Hopefully, there won't be any tornadoes in the forecast. Darn! Just remembered you had tickets to see the Nats play that weekend. Oh well, you can maybe sell your tickets on Craigslist. You go home and list them. Within minutes you have interest. Fred wants the tickets and will meet you at Foggy Bottom Metro station on Sunday at 7 AM. Terri wants them, too. She can come to your house, but she doesn't want to pay face value. You'll figure it out. It's Friday night. Time for sleep after a long week.

--On Saturday your wife decides she wants a "night out" with you. You decide to go early at 5 PM so the restaurant won't be crowded and you won't need to pay the babysitter any more than you need to. The going rate for one kid is $10 per hour, after all. You drive out and hope to to hop on I-66 to try a restaurant that some of the brilliant posters on the NoVA forum of C-D recommended. Just as you are getting off Nutley Street, you realize that 66 Westbound is BUMPER TO BUMPER in both directions. Wait, how can that be? It's not morning rush hour (6 am to 10 am) nor is it evening rush hour (2 PM to 8 PM). It's not even a weekday! What's up? Then your wife tells you the neighbor said I-66 is always like this. It's always crowded all. the. time.

So you underestimate your time to get to the trendiest Indian/ElSavadoran/Korean fusion restaurant this side of the Potomac. Then when you get there, you find out you are lucky! Because you are so early, there is only a 45-minute wait rather than the usual hour and a half! So while you wait, you check your Blackberry a few times (Reminder go to the Apple Store in Tyson's on Sunday to get the newest I-Phone, people at work are starting to give you a hard time about your antiquated phone), only to find an email from your boss that he wants you to stay late for a dinner meeting on Monday. Darn! Now you'll miss your son's soccer practice. And you'll have to deal with a non-rush hour train on the way home. Luckily, it's only a 12 minute wait usually if you don't time it right. You finally eat your meal, which is quite delicious and hip! You get the bill and are surprised at the high cost, even though you don't drink alcohol. But you understand that the owners have to pay the high rent prices. So you drop $70 for the meal plus a $15 tip (no meal tax, at least!) and off you rush to get home to pay the babysitter. You realize you've been gone 4 hours and owe her $40. Now you need to drive her home. $125 for a rushed evening out with your wife. Too bad you can't work overtime. Everything is so pricey here!

--On Monday morning while at work, you receive a phone call from your wife. She just got the mail. Your son recieved his CogAt scores from school! And he scored 131! Fantastic! He scored better than 97% of other students his age nationwide! It should be high enough to get into the advanced academic program in Fairfax County. Hold on. Wife's got another call. It's Barbara down the street. Her son got a 146. Darn! Why didn't we pay for a prep course for you son? Hold on again. It's Cynthia this time. She's heard rumors that the AAP cutoff is 132 this year. You and your wife discuss doing a parent referral. She asks you to talk to your religious leader to see if he'll write a recommendation for your son. Your wife thinks it's now worth shelling out $120 per month for piano lessons to add to his "resume" of activities that he does. It can only help the referral packet. Wife quicky hangs up phone with you because she realizes that she needs to call George Mason U. to get an appointment for your son to take WISC in case he needs to get in on appeal. She'd better call quickly before the other parents at the other 100+ elementary schools in the county open their mail. Luckily, the test cost is only $395. It's worth it because you're sure he'll do well on it, assuring him a spot in AAP. Well, wait? Will he do well on it? Maybe he should do WISC with a private psychologist. Sure they're more money but $550 is worth it if he's with a trained professional rather than a college student. Wife books the psychologist who is only available the morning of the camping trip. That's okay. You'll drive there late and take your own car rather than carpool. Thankfully, it's only in the Shenandoah Mountains near Front Royal. Should be only 1 1/2 hour drive each way. Except the psychologist is in Arlington in the other direction. Okay ride will be 2 hours to get there. You hang up with your wife and get back to work. You stay late for your meeting. Get home well after dark. Slip into the house and turn on the computer. Thank goodness for City-Data. You can finally relax!

Of course not all of these things usually happen in the same weekend. I moved away from there 6 weeks ago, and I miss every blasted minute of it.

[Darkseid]

When it comes to driving, I learned that it is very important that if you are driving to an appointment then you absolutely, positively must leave in plenty of time to make there on time. You also need to learn to factor in time for traffic jams. Yes, that has meant that many times I have been really early, but many times it has saved me.

[Caladium]

Originally Posted by Caladium

The most stressful thing that happened to me today was the weather was gorgeous but I had to go to work.

...just think about the many towns in this country (and around the world) where you could spend a gorgeous day outside because you haven't been able to find a job for a year. Not to mention all the time you can spend outside if your house gets foreclosed on and you're evicted. It's stressful living in a thriving area, I tell ya.

[oneasterisk]

Originally Posted by michgc

It's stressful because there are so many people here. And it is expensive. And you are surrounded by high-achievers. This is how life works in NoVA:

It's a good think I'm an under achiever or I'd go bananas trying to live this lifestyle...

[sonnymarkjiz]

Traffic+snobby people+people who can't drive+fast paced lifestyle=hectic.

Take a trip anywhere south of Stafford and you'll see how much the quality in life changes. Very slow paced livin down there...

[katyusha25]

Vishnu, I have to thank you for the laughs I get when you post. I see a thread from you and think, "oh boy - here we go."

Thank you!

P.S. You worry way too much. And Caladium is right; if you worry about all these things when considering a move to NOVA, the area might not be for you.

[jazzmanjoe123]

Originally Posted by Darkseid

When it comes to driving, I learned that it is very important that if you are driving to an appointment then you absolutely, positively must leave in plenty of time to make there on time. You also need to learn to factor in time for traffic jams. Yes, that has meant that many times I have been really early, but many times it has saved me.

good point.


I leave 40 minutes early for a 15-20 min commute just in case. Some days are jammed for NO REASON. And now that I'm moving further to a 30 minute commute, I'll be leaving an hour early. Yay

[slduvall]

Please explain. If metro breaking down once in a while is the cause of stress, I could probably handle that once or twice every few years or so.[/quote]

Once in a while...HA! Not being in control of your transportation can be very stressful. That applies to metro, bus, and driving, whatever! Too much snow...too much sun...too much rain..it all means one thing - TOO MANY PEOPLE!

People from Cali talk about traffic till they get here. At least there people are headed in many directions. Here they are all trying to get to the same basic destination over too few roads, and way too few bridges.

But it is what you make it...I made a decision to be relatively stress free. Easy commute etc. But the other day the dentist made a different decision for me...root canal. You just never know!

Stop woryring and brush your teeth! Don't be that guy on the metro!