Four kids commit suicide in one week in Luzerne County. (Scranton: house, middle school)

[MatildaLoo]

Originally Posted by robertpolyglot

We lived in Bergen County for a while when I was a kid, but not in THAT town. Had my parents not opted to move West, I probably would have grown up in that county. I am not familiar with that news event. The only such NJ event that commanded national attention was the recent Rutgers Univ. student.

When it happens at a Catholic HS, it seems even odder. The only one I've ever known of, at the peer level, was someone who was basically invisible and did this between junior and senior year at my HS. How did the school and the student body deal with it? In a cavalier manner, as if it was still invisible and as if this person had little social worth anyway. How convenient for the school that it happened during summer break and not during the school year... I had to pull out the yearbook to see who the person was because, despite being a small school, I didn't have a name-face recognition for this guy. The cumulative effect of seeing attitudes like this is that they take a hit on how ardent one is toward their religion.

Our high school principal decided to address teen suicide by telling us that if we committed suicide, the school wouldn't hold a memorial for us and we wouldn't be mourned.

[auntieannie68]

Originally Posted by Mr Yuk

I agree with this, another thing this society needs is parents who are more involved with their kids' lives. Maybe parents need to decide to stay in an older home or drive a less-fancy car and maybe work less so they can actually be involved in their kids' lives. Some parents maybe need to spend less time on a barstool or on a golf course and spend more time with their kids. With more parents working to keep up with the Joneses, as well as more single-parent homes, kids are more and more alone these days without any real support system. No wonder suicides are becoming more common. Instead of treating the root problem, kids are just doped up with psychotropic medications these days...

medical treatment only occurs if families are interested--have adequate insurance and can find a physician/therapist that knows how to deal with adolescents-- nowadays meeting all the above criteria is like looking for a needle in a haystack

[weluvpa]

ITS THE EASY WAY OUT.

Our society and culture in the last 20 plus years has conditioned our children and people in general to look for the easy way out. Period, nothing more, nothing less.

I have lost 3 very close friends to suicide and it was the easiest way to "NOT" deal with their issues.

Our society teaches kids to look for the easiest way, whether its work, life, society. Skating through is easier then working hard to overcome obstacles, life, jobs.

Bullying IS NOTHING NEW IN SCHOOL. The difference is how society has conditioned our children to run from or avoid their issues until the issues eat them apart from the inside.

In my day, if you were bullied, you defended yourself and either kicked their azzes or bullied them back. YOU STOOD UP FOR YOURSELVES.

Now kids are told you ethier run from the fight and DON'T DEFEND YOURSELF or you'll arrested like the bully.

Teaching our children to run and cower from their adversary's is part of the problem in our society.

This isn't about bullies or depression, its about how are children are being taught to deal with their issues and issues in society in general.

Teach them to stop and stand up for themselves and stop teaching them to run and look for the easy way out of their issues and they will learn how to deal with life and its hurdles rather then looking for a way out or around the hurdles.

[sheena12]

Originally Posted by robertpolyglot

We lived in Bergen County for a while when I was a kid, but not in THAT town. Had my parents not opted to move West, I probably would have grown up in that county. I am not familiar with that news event. The only such NJ event that commanded national attention was the recent Rutgers Univ. student.

When it happens at a Catholic HS, it seems even odder. The only one I've ever known of, at the peer level, was someone who was basically invisible and did this between junior and senior year at my HS. How did the school and the student body deal with it? In a cavalier manner, as if it was still invisible and as if this person had little social worth anyway. How convenient for the school that it happened during summer break and not during the school year... I had to pull out the yearbook to see who the person was because, despite being a small school, I didn't have a name-face recognition for this guy. The cumulative effect of seeing attitudes like this is that they take a hit on how ardent one is toward their religion.

It was also the subject of a Village Voice article back in the 80s and the book I referenced, Donna Gaine's "Teenage Wasteland". Dr. Gaines is a graduate of my alma mater, Stony Brook University, where she received her BA, MSW and PhD.

Gaines analysis of Berganfield is worth examining by residents of the Valley. Berganfield has a lot of similarities to this area. Fairly insular - even from surrounding Bergen County, was populated mostly by white working class and middle income people, and lower middle to middle class people who took sports seriously and worshiped their athletes.

In terms of Catholic schools, the huge divide that exists here between atletes and non-athletes was one of the many reasons I chose Holy Redeemer over the local public schools.
Wyoming Valley West is even worse in this regard, with a disintegrating academic plant, a mediocre school system, and a brand new stadium. Worship of Athletes is rampant at all Valley Public Schools.
Just as it was in Berganfield.

[weluvpa]

The simple fact that the windbag Corbett on WILK has been going iff about the bullying policy's in the school just shows that blaming a bully is easier then dealing with the way our children are being condition.

Its been stated that this is NOT because of bullying, but yet railing on the the bullying policy is the answer and reason.

Lets blame the school, policy's etc....IT'S ALWAYS SOMEBODY ELSES FAULT. Should our mantra in society today.

[sheena12]

Originally Posted by MatildaLoo

Our high school principal decided to address teen suicide by telling us that if we committed suicide, the school wouldn't hold a memorial for us and we wouldn't be mourned.

That strikes me as cold and dismissive. As though people who are in so much emotional pain take their own lives for "the attention".

What year was this and which district? I'm horrified.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by Mr Yuk

But generally, designer clothes are not allowed. School uniform pants cannot have any brand label on them, and the shirts must be plain polo shirts with the school district monogram on it, at least in Scranton.

We don't have uniforms. Just a very, very strict dress code. Uniforms don't help anyway. Humans will always find a way to classify and prioritize.

[MatildaLoo]

Originally Posted by sheena12

That strikes me as cold and dismissive. As though people who are in so much emotional pain take their own lives for "the attention".

What year was this and which district? I'm horrified.

I think "cold and dismissive" was on her resume. She was not a nice person.

[sheena12]

Originally Posted by fisheye

With suicides there are many gray areas. How many times have we heard of a death where a young person was fooling around with oxygen starvation (suffocation). Some kids sniff glue, hair spray, gasoline or other dangerous products – is that suicide or just stupidity?

I cannot help but think that my 'baby boomer' generation grew up with the promise of a better life. We were going to have flying cars and astronauts to the stars. We also had job security – we did not have to worry about our job vanishing or moving to another country. I think that we have lost much of our optimism. More people have come to the realization that things will not get better – but the bad economy has not helped. Whatever we feel gets passed down to our children.

We also have the thought of instant gratification. Society has lost patience. Take the easy way out – don't wait. You can have an almost empty parking lot and somebody will still park in the fire lane or the handicapped parking space (even though they have no handicap).

Bullies or sports can also turn up the pressure. We will probably hear more on these suicides in the days to come. It is just very disturbing that so many young took their lives in such a short period of time.

Many good points here! also a baby boomer (tail end but still) we grew up with a certain optimism and security. Yeah we were afraid of the Russians, all that duck and cover crap of early childhood still haunts me.

But by the time most of us hit high school, we realized that this whole Cold War thing was a game of "chicken" if they pressed The Button seconds later we would and we ALL knew it - even the scary Russians.

We did not live in fear of our jobs being "Out Sourced" or of our parent jobs being sent to India. Hell there was no word for "outsourced"!
A son or daughter of someone who worked in a plant or had another blue collar job could go to college. Now there is the worship of the rich, and the obscenely rich. If you don't go to college, what's left? A job in Walmart? That's not gonna cut it.

There was not bullying to the extent that I see it today and there was not the pathological fear of drugs.

I am in no way condoning drugs and there are some pretty scary new drugs out there today.

BUT in the 1980s a schism began to develop between the Jocks - the ones adults didn't think smoked pot, and the music kids. The ones parents thought smoked pot.

( btw I do not put weed in the same category as freaky stuff such as bath salts, crack, and oxycontin)

So the non athletes are marginalized as druggies or losers, and the jocks are idolized and permitted to get away with things, and when others are blamed for all of the ills of the school and the community at large.

[warren zee]

Originally Posted by SteelCityRising

Considering two of those who tragically chose to end their own lives were from my hometown of Pittston this certainly hits close to home for me. I was suicidal a couple of years ago when I was living in Virginia, and I know how it feels when you think the world would be burdened less if you were no longer residing within it. I sought therapy, and I feel like I'm in a much better position today than I ever thought possible.

I do know that even in just the seven years since I graduated from Pittston Area the district has really ramped up its anti-bullying efforts. The dress code now is a very strict business casual to deter students from bullying one another based upon attire, and teachers have received extra training in regards to identifying students who may be bullied or who are bullying others. It wasn't easy for me to be the only openly-gay male in my high school class, but not only did MANY others in my class "come out" after we graduated, but I spoke to a few underclassmen who said they felt more comfortable being themselves after I came out. For as much as some on here might champion NEPA as being socially progressive it's still VERY regressive on certain fronts, including homophobia, and I hope efforts to specifically target bullying based upon sexual orientation have been strengthened in the region since I graduated.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the affected families and friends.

Paul, Why is every incident about being gay? Do you know that these people were gay? People not in the gay community are also bullied.