NC divorce laws (attorneys, living, professionals)

[Boydawg]

During a legal separation between husband & wife I have heard there is an agreement which can be made to allow both parties to date other people during the separation period
Anyone ever heard of this?

[LRoyal10900]

As long as you're legally separated, you can do whatever you please, except get remarried. There does not have to be any particular stipulation in the agreement.

[mm_mary73]

Originally Posted by Boydawg

During a legal separation between husband & wife I have heard there is an agreement which can be made to allow both parties to date other people during the separation period
Anyone ever heard of this?

The separation period is supposed to allow the parties to "work it out", not have permission to see others. If you're thinking of dating someone who is separated, be very sure there is a fully executed agreement in place, or you could be named as an adulterer.

[Mr Yuck]

Isn't this a no-fault state?

[brokensky]

A legal separation stipulates that indeed, the two people will be just that - totally separated. If they are NOT totally separated (continue to see one another, one spouse "moves back" or the couple has sex) the separation is invalid. A divorce can be granted in NC on the basis of one year's separation alone. The court would require witnesses to ascertain that the two people involved have not been involved during the year.

So, no, a legal separation is NOT a period for reconcilation or to "work things out." A legal separation is the first step to getting a no fault divorce in the state of NC.

ETA: If you are dating someone who is legally separated . . . and they have signed separation papers . . .I would not worry about it unless you have reason to believe the person will reconcile w/ his/her spouse b/f the one year separation is over.

[brokensky]

Originally Posted by Mr Yuck

Isn't this a no-fault state?

People drag each other into court here mostly in regard to custody issues, and it is in an attempt to prove someone is an "unfit parent" that adultery charges usually get leveled. Otherwise, one can simply be apart from one's spouse for a year and get a divorce, based on that separation alone.

Of course, when there are marital assets, people turn to attorneys and the courts to try to sort that out.

[brokensky]

Here is the law. I was wrong re: sexual relations. Evidently, our lawmakers here decided that having "isolated sexual relations" w/ your separated spouse while living apart does not affect the one year date, if I read that last sentence correctly.


§50-6. DIVORCE AFTER SEPARATION OF ONE YEAR ON APPLICATION OF EITHER PARTY

§ 50-6. Divorce after separation of one year on application of either party

Marriages may be dissolved and the parties thereto divorced from the bonds of matrimony on the application of either party, if and when the husband and wife have lived separate and apart for one year, and the plaintiff or defendant in the suit for divorce has resided in the State for a period of six months. A divorce under this section shall not be barred to either party by any defense or plea based upon any provision of G.S. 50-7, a plea of res judicata, or a plea of recrimination. Notwithstanding the provisions of G.S. 50-11, or of the common law, a divorce under this section shall not affect the rights of a dependent spouse with respect to alimony which have been asserted in the action or any other pending action.

Whether there has been a resumption of marital relations during the period of separation shall be determined pursuant to G.S. 52-10.2. Isolated incidents of sexual intercourse between the parties shall not toll the statutory period required for divorce predicated on separation of one year.

[mm_mary73]

Originally Posted by anifani821

.......So, no, a legal separation is NOT a period for reconcilation or to "work things out." A legal separation is the first step to getting a no fault divorce in the state of NC....

That's what my atty. told me..... I thought it was bogus, but whatever......

[brokensky]

Originally Posted by mm_mary73

That's what my atty. told me..... I thought it was bogus, but whatever......

MM - not sure if you meant that it was bogus that the separation period is to "work things out" or if you meant it was bogus that a separation means a clean break. (Sorry - I get confused, LOL!!!)

Here is what I have observed over 30 years. Seems attorneys have gotten into "case management" - more like healthcare professionals - in re: to their divorce clients. I think they sometimes encourage spouses to try to "work things out" - either b/c the attorney feels a moral obligation to do so (wh/ I do not approve of - keep your moral beliefs to yourself and just represent my wishes, please) . . . or b/c they know that the more two people drag things out, the more contention and thus - billable hours for the attorney.

So I am rather jaded about divorce attorneys, and I apologize to any of them who may read this and who honestly do not try to increase billable hours by stirring the pot, so to speak, w/ their divorce clients.

NC's law was essentially created to provide a simple way for two people to go their separate ways . . . and a year later, get a clean, simple divorce. Such a straight-forward methodology pretty much cuts out the need for divorce attorneys except for writing up the legal separation papers. Of course, when there are custodial issues, assets, etc. there is more to be handled, but the law makes it possible for two people to literally just move apart for a year and then get a divorce. And actually, a person could get the proper forms and fill them out him/herself (altho I would not recommend that - but let's say you are 22 years old, got married too early, and you and your spouse agree it was a mistake - this law allows a simple parting of ways).

I am so thankful there are wonderful attorneys in this state . . . as there are times we all need a good attorney. I just don't think most of them push a simple divorce b/c there is very little money in it for them if things go that way.

[gigipooh2]

Where can I download Legal seperation forms?