Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Can I ask why you do this? Clearly you are aware you're early....Just wondering what goes through a person's mind when it's a habit rather than a one-off.
Appointments and work I understand; parties, I don't get.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WannaliveinGreenville
Of all the people here that are saying it's rude to arrive early, let me ask you this question:
Are you (yourself) always early, on time or late for your job?
How about the appointments you make? (same as above).
I'm curious. It seems being early is rude now... so what is being late (and not a party) ....is that acceptable to you to be late (if you are)?
How about the airport, how much time do you allow to arrive at the airport, compared to the time your flight takes off? Just curious.
I ask this because some say being early is rude and some say being late is rude. Just trying to see if they go together in some way for others.
Okay, just Wow! I really had no idea people thought arriving at a party early would be considered rude. Thank you to all who clarified that for me. I've never had anyone slam a door, ask me to drive 20 miles for some beer (lol) or send me away for 30 minutes. I've never had anyone do anything except warmly welcome me in their home and say, "Hey, you are here early!" and then I would say, "Can I help you with anything?" If they said no, I would get out of their hair and play with the kids or the dog.... I will forever remember it is rude to arrive early!
I guess I looked at it from my perspective. If I am going to have a dinner party and I tell everyone 7 p.m. I would have everything ready by 6 p.m. and then relax.... That way I don't have the last minute shower, and a zillion other things to worry about. I guess that darn "early gene" pops in when I am getting ready to have a party. But thanks again for making it clear.
Okay, just Wow! I really had no idea people thought arriving at a party early would be considered rude. Thank you to all who clarified that for me. I've never had anyone slam a door, ask me to drive 20 miles for some beer (lol) or send me away for 30 minutes. I've never had anyone do anything except warmly welcome me in their home and say, "Hey, you are here early!" and then I would say, "Can I help you with anything?" If they said no, I would get out of their hair and play with the kids or the dog.... I will forever remember it is rude to arrive early!
I guess I looked at it from my perspective. If I am going to have a dinner party and I tell everyone 7 p.m. I would have everything ready by 6 p.m. and then relax.... That way I don't have the last minute shower, and a zillion other things to worry about. I guess that darn "early gene" pops in when I am getting ready to have a party. But thanks again for making it clear.
I'm the same way. When I used to throw parties, I made sure everything was ready an hour or two before, then I would relax until the guests came. My parents do that too.
Okay, just Wow! I really had no idea people thought arriving at a party early would be considered rude. Thank you to all who clarified that for me. I've never had anyone slam a door, ask me to drive 20 miles for some beer (lol) or send me away for 30 minutes. I've never had anyone do anything except warmly welcome me in their home and say, "Hey, you are here early!" and then I would say, "Can I help you with anything?" If they said no, I would get out of their hair and play with the kids or the dog.... I will forever remember it is rude to arrive early!
I guess I looked at it from my perspective. If I am going to have a dinner party and I tell everyone 7 p.m. I would have everything ready by 6 p.m. and then relax.... That way I don't have the last minute shower, and a zillion other things to worry about. I guess that darn "early gene" pops in when I am getting ready to have a party. But thanks again for making it clear.
Congrats on having "the early gene."
Now you know that not everyone else has it, and some do things differently from you.
It doesn't matter if you "stay out of their way." You're still there in their home when they can't entertain you, therefore putting pressure on them to hurry up with whatever they're doing and get out there to host you, which IS rude.
The moment that ^^ happened, I would have said, "Well, since you were early and I haven't had time to get ready, you can do them the 'right' way while I go get dressed."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Praline
The few times when a guest arrived early, I just told one, "I didn't expect anyone to arrive so early. Well, help yourself to a drink and have a seat. You'll have to excuse me because I still have to finish up a few things," and I left her to entertain herself.
Agree with these! I almost never host at my home, but when I do, I really dislike when people are early. A few minutes early is fine. But 30 minutes??? That's nuts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessxwrites89
I take public transit and I usually arrive early because I have to plan accordingly to transit schedules. I arrive to work early. With work, I just read and write before I clock in. With friends and family, I offer to help or they tell me what to do.
I also take public transit and am almost always early to work and appointments. If I'm heading to a good friend's house, I'll let them know ahead of time if there's a chance I'll be a little *too* early and ask if there's anything I can help with. If they are excited for help, great. If they're not, I let them know I'll be there when the party starts and find something else to do with my time (read, hang out at a nearby store, etc). If it's someone I don't know much, I just plan to get there when the party starts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flamingo13
I can't personally imagine waiting until 30 mins. before a scheduled party, event, whatever to start getting ready (shower, makeup, dressing, etc.) - I can imagine waiting those 30 mins. to start figuring out exact placement of dishes, what extra things might be needed, etc.
Like the OP, I use those last 30 minutes to get myself ready. I don't want to get ready before I'm done cooking/cleaning, and I count on that extra time to quickly shower and prepare myself for company. I don't have some long shower routine, so 30 minutes is more than enough time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundaydrive00
Probably best not to go skinny dipping when you're expecting guests.
Or at least not when the expected guests include at least one early bird
Now you know that not everyone else has it, and some do things differently from you.
It doesn't matter if you "stay out of their way." You're still there in their home when they can't entertain you, therefore putting pressure on them to hurry up with whatever they're doing and get out there to host you, which IS rude.
If you're not expected, then you're a burden.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GraceKrispy
Agree with these! I almost never host at my home, but when I do, I really dislike when people are early. A few minutes early is fine. But 30 minutes??? That's nuts.
I also take public transit and am almost always early to work and appointments. If I'm heading to a good friend's house, I'll let them know ahead of time if there's a chance I'll be a little *too* early and ask if there's anything I can help with. If they are excited for help, great. If they're not, I let them know I'll be there when the party starts and find something else to do with my time (read, hang out at a nearby store, etc). If it's someone I don't know much, I just plan to get there when the party starts.
Like the OP, I use those last 30 minutes to get myself ready. I don't want to get ready before I'm done cooking/cleaning, and I count on that extra time to quickly shower and prepare myself for company. I don't have some long shower routine, so 30 minutes is more than enough time.
Or at least not when the expected guests include at least one early bird
Honestly, for me, that last 30 minutes is my "slush" time in the event something has gone wrong or not as planned in my prep. If I'm still prepping/getting ready, it's not planned. If everything has gone as planned, that's my "zen" time before I need to be "on". I tend to be an introvert so, much as I enjoy my friends, I find groups and social events draining and sometimes stressful . Not that I don't enjoy them - I do; but that 30-45 minutes of quiet relaxation is an important part of my prep.
Last edited by maciesmom; 07-29-2017 at 03:07 PM..
Now you know that not everyone else has it, and some do things differently from you.
It doesn't matter if you "stay out of their way." You're still there in their home when they can't entertain you, therefore putting pressure on them to hurry up with whatever they're doing and get out there to host you, which IS rude.
If you're not expected, then you're a burden.
Well, apparently having this "early gene" is not a positive thing to most. But realizing others don't feel like me reminds me of a story: I was sitting on a bench and there were 2 girls sitting on the bench (on our break) and they were young, maybe 20-21. We got to talking about men and what we liked about them. I said I liked chest hair. You would have thought I said the most horrible thing to them and they both said, "Ewwww, chest hair!" I looked at them and was surprised. They said chest hair was gross! I happen to think men with a little chest hair are sexy. But boy, it was news to me that they did NOT like chest hair. So, I guess we all think different. I learned today: Early people are rude and men with chest hair are gross. (but not really.... I don't like shaved chests, yuck!)
Well, apparently having this "early gene" is not a positive thing to most. But realizing others don't feel like me reminds me of a story: I was sitting on a bench and there were 2 girls sitting on the bench (on our break) and they were young, maybe 20-21. We got to talking about men and what we liked about them. I said I liked chest hair. You would have thought I said the most horrible thing to them and they both said, "Ewwww, chest hair!" I looked at them and was surprised. They said chest hair was gross! I happen to think men with a little chest hair are sexy. But boy, it was news to me that they did NOT like chest hair. So, I guess we all think different. I learned today: Early people are rude and men with chest hair are gross. (but not really.... I don't like shaved chests, yuck!)
Except your opinion on chest hair doesn't impinge on people who are kind enough to host/entertain you. A chest-hair preference is just that -a preference. Arriving 30 minutes early as a guest to a party in someone's home puts the onus on them to handle you being there. It's not really a simple "different strokes" situation.
Last edited by maciesmom; 07-29-2017 at 03:06 PM..
Your faux sarcasm isn't working. Early people are not rude. That's not the takeaway.
In some instances, which many of us have tried to explain, it's a great idea to be early.
But it's NOT a great idea when you are going to someone's HOME. See the difference?
Yes. I see the difference. My point was that what I perceived to be, is not always the case.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I really had no idea people thought arriving at a party early would be considered rude. Thank you to all who clarified that for me. 
I've never had anyone slam a door, ask me to drive 20 miles for some beer (lol) or send me away for 30 minutes. I've never had anyone do anything except warmly welcome me in their home and say, "Hey, you are here early!" and then I would say, "Can I help you with anything?" If they said no, I would get out of their hair and play with the kids or the dog.... I will forever remember it is rude to arrive early!
I almost never host at my home, but when I do, I really dislike when people are early. A few minutes early is fine. But 30 minutes??? That's nuts. 
