Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Born and raised in NJ, and lived there until my oldest was in high school when a job transfer took us south. I was so positive my kids would suffer academically that we didn't even consider public schools, at first. But, here's a news flash, they didn't, and except for the oldest, they attended public schools. We shelled out big bucks for the oldest boy to attend a private high school, followed by college at UM. Then we got smarter, and realized our youngest could dual enroll at GA Tech through his public high school. He ended up graduating HS with 42 college credits that transferred to his school of choice, which came with a full tuition scholarship.
I love NJ, and would probably still be there if it wasn't for the job. But NJ doesn't have anywhere near the amount of colleges that GA does. It doesn't have the HOPE scholarship. So, while the elementary schools, and most of the high schools are well-regarded, don't think they are levels above schools in the south, at least not schools in good towns.
Let me start by saying i was born and raised in Essex County, NJ...so i am NOT a transplant experiencing culture shock. I am 30 years old, recently married, and have lived here all my life. My wife and I are putting all of our resources into trying to leave the state within the next 2-5 years. We hate to be far away from family and friends but we are both so burnt out by life in the north jersey metro area.
So many people here are astonishingly rude, selfish, and ignorant. It is a rarity for anyone to hold a door for you, or let you get into traffic. If you do these things for other people, only expect about a 30-50% chance at best of getting a "thank you" or a courtesy wave back. Apparently the signs that say "yield for pedestrians" in parking lots are a foreign language to most people here.
Everyone is in a rush for nothing. Im no slow poke on the roads but being tailgated is still a frequent occurrence. The nanosecond that the traffic light turns green, some a-hole a few cars back has to lean on his horn. Reckless driving and road rage is endemic. If something holds up the line at a supermarket or the drugstore, people are ready to lose their minds. That fact that everything and everywhere is so crowded does help either.
I realize that there are a-holes in every part of the country, but the rate of them here is vastly higher.
The cost of living here is absolutely outrageous. Property taxes are obscene. Highest car insurance rates in the country. For alot of people (myself included) it is an epic struggle to maintain a middle class existence here.
To be fair, not all parts of NJ are this bad. Its mainly the northeast region of the state. And don't get me wrong, there are some pro's to living here. Ill admit we do have the best schools, doctors, hospitals, etc. and it is a very culturally rich area. But the negatives far outweigh the positives. Id gladly give up my access to NJ Diners, good Italian food, real pizza, and Taylor Ham to be able to have a comfortable middle class existence in another state, among civilized people with manners and common courtesy. I realize that i might make less money in another state for the same job, but what good is having more money when you are pissing it all away just to be able to live here. And some things are more important than money, such as peace of mind and not being constantly stressed out.
Judging by the fact that NJ has the highest ratio if any state in the U.S. of people fleeing the state compared to people moving in, its apparent I'm not the only one who feels this way. The States People Are Fleeing In 2013 - Forbes
With a little luck, within a few years my wife and i will be joining the exodus of middle class people fleeing the state.
Funny, persons on Staten Island are saying the exact same thing! *LOL*
Let me start by saying i was born and raised in Essex County, NJ...so i am NOT a transplant experiencing culture shock. I am 30 years old, recently married, and have lived here all my life. My wife and I are putting all of our resources into trying to leave the state within the next 2-5 years. We hate to be far away from family and friends but we are both so burnt out by life in the north jersey metro area.
So many people here are astonishingly rude, selfish, and ignorant. It is a rarity for anyone to hold a door for you, or let you get into traffic. If you do these things for other people, only expect about a 30-50% chance at best of getting a "thank you" or a courtesy wave back. Apparently the signs that say "yield for pedestrians" in parking lots are a foreign language to most people here.
Everyone is in a rush for nothing. Im no slow poke on the roads but being tailgated is still a frequent occurrence. The nanosecond that the traffic light turns green, some a-hole a few cars back has to lean on his horn. Reckless driving and road rage is endemic. If something holds up the line at a supermarket or the drugstore, people are ready to lose their minds. That fact that everything and everywhere is so crowded does help either.
I realize that there are a-holes in every part of the country, but the rate of them here is vastly higher.
The cost of living here is absolutely outrageous. Property taxes are obscene. Highest car insurance rates in the country. For alot of people (myself included) it is an epic struggle to maintain a middle class existence here.
To be fair, not all parts of NJ are this bad. Its mainly the northeast region of the state. And don't get me wrong, there are some pro's to living here. Ill admit we do have the best schools, doctors, hospitals, etc. and it is a very culturally rich area. But the negatives far outweigh the positives. Id gladly give up my access to NJ Diners, good Italian food, real pizza, and Taylor Ham to be able to have a comfortable middle class existence in another state, among civilized people with manners and common courtesy. I realize that i might make less money in another state for the same job, but what good is having more money when you are pissing it all away just to be able to live here. And some things are more important than money, such as peace of mind and not being constantly stressed out.
Judging by the fact that NJ has the highest ratio if any state in the U.S. of people fleeing the state compared to people moving in, its apparent I'm not the only one who feels this way. The States People Are Fleeing In 2013 - Forbes
With a little luck, within a few years my wife and i will be joining the exodus of middle class people fleeing the state.
I know. They've invaded NJ like a swarm of English language-mangling locusts.
My family is old school SI and no, they are not going to NJ but moving down south. The few that did go to Joisey are making plans for moving to the other side of the Mason-Dixon soon as possible. They just cannot deal with the taxes in NJ any longer.
Personally if one didn't have to work in the City would love moving back onto the Rock. Of course the murder rate probably would increase a bit, but then as Madea says "if they got me, got me, got me; I got to get them, get them, get them." *LOL*
That is very true, but I guess that it is just easier for the OP--and some other folks--to carp about their problems (both real and imagined), rather than doing something about the situation.
I do like South Jersey. My family originally has its roots in Cape May county. But i just want to make a clean break at this point. I mainly want relief from the financial burden of living in the state.
I, like so many others felt the same way you do and left our Garden State Home. Some have made other States their new home and loved it others have not. 13 yrs. ago my husband and I decided we were leaving So. NJ for greener pastures. We quit our "high profile" jobs, closed our eyes and picked a State in which we would relocate to. We moved to E. NC after my husband found a job 10 yrs. ago. We really enjoyed it for a couple of years. Of course, we came back to NJ for Christmas, HS Graduations, etc. Then last year I realized how much we have missed leaving our kids and grand kids and want to go back home to "So. NJ".
Now, it isn't as easy as just going back. We have a home. So do we rent it out, or try to sell it? My husband will find out sometime next week if he got the job he interviewed for while we were up in NJ for Christmas. If it works out, I will be down here in NC trying to get everything together and he will be back in NJ.
I wish you luck in your decision, & understand completely. I can't stress enough to make sure you have employment before you relocate.
I am one to say that the grass is not always greener. It was a good experience while it lasted, but now it is time for us to go back home to NJ, whatever it takes. kelsie
Last edited by kelsie; 01-05-2014 at 05:51 PM..
Reason: added text & typo
I, like so many others felt the same way you do and left our Garden State Home. Some have made other States their new home and loved it others have not. 13 yrs. ago my husband and I decided we were leaving So. NJ for greener pastures. We quit our "high profile" jobs, closed our eyes and picked a State in which we would relocate to. We moved to E. NC after my husband found job 10 yrs. ago & really enjoyed it for a couple of years. Of course, we came back to NJ for Christmas, HS Graduations, etc. Then last year I realized how much we have missed leaving our kids and grand kids and want to go back home to "So. NJ".
Now, it isn't as easy as just going back. We have a home. So do we rent it out, or try to sell it? My husband will find out if he got the job he interviewed for last. If it works out, I will be down here in NC trying to get everything together and he will be back in NJ.
I wish you luck in your decision, & understand completely. I can't stress enough to make sure you have employment before you relocate.
I am one to say that the grass is not always greener. It was a good experience while it lasted, but now it is time for us to go back home to NJ, whatever it takes. kelsie
Pull or lure of NJ can be very strong for many that were born and raised there; just look at actor Robert Sean Leonard (born Westwood, NJ) who stated in interviews part of the reason he was happy to leave "House" was to return to NJ where he felt at "home".
I, like so many others felt the same way you do and left our Garden State Home. Some have made other States their new home and loved it others have not. 13 yrs. ago my husband and I decided we were leaving So. NJ for greener pastures. We quit our "high profile" jobs, closed our eyes and picked a State in which we would relocate to. We moved to E. NC after my husband found job 10 yrs. ago & really enjoyed it for a couple of years. Of course, we came back to NJ for Christmas, HS Graduations, etc. Then last year I realized how much we have missed leaving our kids and grand kids and want to go back home to "So. NJ".
Now, it isn't as easy as just going back. We have a home. So do we rent it out, or try to sell it? My husband will find out if he got the job he interviewed for last. If it works out, I will be down here in NC trying to get everything together and he will be back in NJ.
I wish you luck in your decision, & understand completely. I can't stress enough to make sure you have employment before you relocate.
I am one to say that the grass is not always greener. It was a good experience while it lasted, but now it is time for us to go back home to NJ, whatever it takes. kelsie
Thank you for the well wishes..and I can definitely understand why you would want to be close to kids and grandkids back in NJ. But in my situation (young newlyweds about to start a family) i think its best for us to move on. By moving somewhere with a dramatically lower cost of living, we can try to have my wife be a stay at home mom instead of us both having to work and put the kid in day care. And we would likely be able to afford to own our own home much sooner instead of having to keep renting.
Not to mention i would much rather have my children someday grow up somewhere a little more friendly than essex county, NJ.
Many of the friends i had gone to high school with have already fled to places like FL, SC, AZ, CO, PA, ME, IN, OH, etc. and without exception every one of them have told me it was the right decision. I think many young people are looking at the big picture and deciding to leave.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
