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I recently caught up with a good friend of mine whom I haven't seen in years. The last time I saw/hung out with her, she was bubbly, adventurous and fun; one of those people you couldn't not be energetic around. This time around (3+ years later), she looked really different and her whole take on life was different—it was like she had gotten the life sucked out of her. She wasn't as fun and hardly joked. I know we all grow up but she did mention that she had battled depression for awhile and even cut herself. It broke my heart but it also saddened me that she didn't have this ball of enthusiasm in her anymore. I'm not really one to judge but this girl went from being cutesy and pretty-dressed up to having no effort. But recently, as I started talking to her more, the things she says kind of scares me.
We're both 20-year-olds, so we're still fairly young but every time we talk now, out of no where, she brings up these things about the Tribulation, the end of the world, etc. I mean... it REALLY freaks me out and it makes me wonder if she's part of some cult or something. She looks really deep and is rather pragmatic about things and it gives me second thoughts about her.
I battled depression myself not too long ago and I feel like my wild side never left me but I'm still a bit socially awkward. I try to "revive" myself and be as bubbly as I know I can be but I think this is too much for me to handle. I don't want to lose my friend but she is really not the same anymore and I'm rather freaked out by most of the things she says. I've politely told her to stop but she keeps going on about these things. I really don't know how to handle all this without losing a friend..
You can suggest she go to counseling - even offer to help her set up an appointment. However you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
I would distance myself from a person like that if she is not willing to seek help.
You can suggest she go to counseling - even offer to help her set up an appointment. However you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
I would distance myself from a person like that if she is not willing to seek help.
I forgot to mention that she lives in another state but she does come here every one in awhile. I fear she's possessed or brain-washed because I couldn't believe the stuff she was saying to me last night--it really sounded like she's been either possessed or brain-washed.
I forgot to mention that she lives in another state but she does come here every one in awhile. I fear she's possessed or brain-washed because I couldn't believe the stuff she was saying to me last night--it really sounded like she's been either possessed or brain-washed.
That does happen with cults and so forth. Rare, but it does happen. Also more probable is mental illness (more common).
So far as helping others, you must first take care of yourself. If being around another person causes you distress and harm, then best to not allow that (for your own mental health).
So far as helping others, you must first take care of yourself. If being around another person causes you distress and harm, then best to not allow that (for your own mental health).
This type of thinking really bothers me. If ya want friends ya have to be a friend, I never cared for fair weather friends, far too shallow for me. This person needs a friend that tries to help and understand. That may be part of this girls problem, when depression comes on people leave. For some they don't know what to say and it would strain their tiny brains to give time and kindness to a friend or family member. Research is so difficult these days with the internet. And oh it might bring them down and we can't have that now can we. If it were you, how would feel when you needed a friend and everyone ran away? You'd feel worse than before. I know how it feels too. I saved an online friend from doing himself in, called the cops, and when I was flipping out, I got nada in return. Made me feel awful, worse than before. OP, I'm not speaking of you with my general comments above, but I do think she needs a friend now and you may know how it feels to be coping poorly and then have people dump ya. I sure as hell know how that feels. If she starts on something that bothers you, shift the conversation by asking her some questions, but be tactful, don't make her feel she cant express how she feels. How about her parents, think you could get any infor on what has happened to her from them?
OP if I were you I would start asking some questions. Whats happened to cause the depression, how long has she had it, has she seen a doc, if so what was his diagnosis, is she on meds now or has she been before? Does she have any support, friends, family? Is she going to church? From this you may get some answers reference her end of the world statements. And if she has any friends putting end of the world ideas in her head. You might ask her if she is in any support groups either online or locally. NAMI has local depression support groups, you may even call someone that coordinates groups for her area, maybe they would call her. There are some online support groups too. Talking to people that are also going through it, ya can sometimes be support for each other in the worst of times. You do know how it feels, thats helpful. Its awful feeling hopeless and being alone and feeling either no one understands or cares. So I do hope you keep in touch with her. Try and get more infor about how long she has felt this way and if anything triggered the downward turn. I would be glad to talk to her too, on here or on a support group that has a chat room. The only depression forum I've been on, I didn't really care for. I can try and look around somemore, for my sake as well as hers. If I can help let me know, you can message me anytime.
It sounds like her "after depression" isn't really "after" at all. Did she seek help for her depression 3 years back? Is she now on meds?, maybe that's why she acts so differently from when you knew her before.
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