Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York > Long Island
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 01-02-2013, 04:32 PM
 
200 posts, read 379,824 times
Reputation: 156

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhBeeHave View Post
You're taking the quote out of context. My response was to Galicia, who has witnessed the same phenomena with the parents in a rural fishing village in Spain. People respond to things which happen close to home; in the case of a fishing village in Spain, a terror bombing in the same country (as opposed to the US) will strike a chord there.
I see. Ok, I missed your point. I can see how that would cause over protectiveness right after the event. I think parenting though has changed and for the worse. All my nieces and nephews are great kids but even with them, my siblings treated them much different than our parents did; and we survived and are thriving.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-02-2013, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Selden New York
1,103 posts, read 1,995,876 times
Reputation: 518
Ride a dirt bike thanks to nimbys and mcmansions. as well as any activity outside even if you go to one of brookhavens monopolized parks 90% of the words start with NO! to awnser your question stay inside is all you can do.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 04:49 PM
 
11,632 posts, read 12,695,930 times
Reputation: 15757
Quote:
Originally Posted by nancy thereader View Post
No more finding Indian artifacts on the beach.
No deer and pheasants in the backyards.
No kids organizing themselves into groups and playing games like "Hide and Go Seek" by themselves.


I'd like to add to your list, games of imagination or "make believe," such as house, superheros, and the very un-PC cowboys and Indians. Children still play these types of games but stop at a much younger age. Girls used to play with dolls until they were around 12 or so. No 12 year old girl today would be caught dead playing with dolls. Although I did have a friend whose 13 year old daughter, once in a while, when she was alone in her room and no one was around, would pull out her old Barbies. Mom never let on that she knew.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 06:06 PM
 
909 posts, read 1,836,809 times
Reputation: 555
I agree with you on all points. The major difference is the media. Internet has made any story, true or not, believable. There has always been bad people and terrible crimes on LI, it just wasn't on facebook for everyone to know about in 5 mins.

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhBeeHave View Post
I believe it is a little of both -- scared and overprotective.

I went door-to-door throughout my neighborhood selling Girl Scout cookies either by myself, or with a friend tagging along. We didn't hear horrific stories in the news of GS being taken inside, molested and murdered.

We were told to steer clear of the creepy house. There was no Megan's Law or sexual predator registry. As kids we were taught to use our wits -- if something didn't seem right, good chance it wasn't so avoid it.

We never saw a child on a milk carton.

Many households had a parent home during the day. There was always a neighbor around if there was a problem or who would let your parent know if they saw you bending the rules. Today there are so many families in which both parents need to work, or which have only one parent who needs to work.

The news reports came on at dinner and later in the evening. You had either the early or late edition of the paper plus those later news reports to get your info, unless you tuned to a newsradio station. Even then, those were not as abundant as 24 hour cable news. Now we have news streamed to us 24/7 by outlets too numerous to count and have social media feeding the frenzy, too. We can learn about a kidnapping in Washington State with as much speed as we learn about local events.

We didn't have Pan Am 103/Lockerbie, 2 attacks on the WTC, the 2004 Madrid train bombings, the 2005 London terror bombings.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 06:24 PM
 
909 posts, read 1,836,809 times
Reputation: 555
Quote:
Originally Posted by rh71 View Post
overprotective... hmm... is it really wise to have your infant/toddler sit in the front seat/bench of a car?

Is it really wise to let a 6 year old watch Murphy's hand get blown off in Robocop, or see the robot lose control and annihilate a room full of people with its machine guns? That was so not cool when I was young and I still remember the horror.

A lot of people talk about "going outside and playing" unlike "spoiled" kids of today. After the hurricane - the 2-week power outage, not many people did that anyway and even if they did it was only for 1-2 hours of the day. "We" only went outside because we really didn't have that much to do. People in the boonies go shoot targets and blow stuff up because they really don't have that much to do.

I think there's a middle ground, but you'd never know it from the way people criticize government, lawmakers, and even parents.
There is a lot of things are better today then in the past. Infant and toddler seats among them. At the same time though are the laws in little too strict? That's debatable.

Speaking of violent media I think your argument is silly. There were ratings on movies when robocop came out and it was your fault or your parents that you watched it. Nowadays the gore is ten times worse and far more readily available.

Going outside to play has alot to do with both parents working. Many kids are at day care or with baby sitters and parents aren't paying to have sitters watch tv while kids are riding bikes in neighborhood. Many parents also compensate with there absence by filling up the kids schedules with everything from little league to art, music dance anything to "keep them out of trouble".

This is everywhere though not LI specific.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Inis Fada
16,966 posts, read 34,708,189 times
Reputation: 7723
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coney View Post
[/b]

I'd like to add to your list, games of imagination or "make believe," such as house, superheros, and the very un-PC cowboys and Indians. Children still play these types of games but stop at a much younger age. Girls used to play with dolls until they were around 12 or so. No 12 year old girl today would be caught dead playing with dolls. Although I did have a friend whose 13 year old daughter, once in a while, when she was alone in her room and no one was around, would pull out her old Barbies. Mom never let on that she knew.
There's too much sexualization of young people on TV, in print ads, etc. I was appalled when some of the girls in my youngest child's 5th grade class were dating -- not just talking about it. Hand holding, kissing, too busy trying to be mature as opposed to being 10 years-old. Their mothers thought is was cute. Cute? These are the same young girls whose mothers let them have insanely short skirts (the minis I wore 25-30 years ago look Victorian in comparison -- and I liked them short) and hoochie clothing.

Last week I nearly keeled over when my now 13 year-old told me that one 8th grade couple were bragging about having sex. The girl said they did it for her 13th birthday. Whether they really did or didn't we'll never know, but I don't recall anyone in the JHS/middle school set bragging about having sex 35 years ago.

There's no time for dolls (Baby or Barbie) when the message being sent is grow up and be sexy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 07:47 PM
 
7,296 posts, read 11,861,266 times
Reputation: 3266
Back in the 1980s there was a whole slew of crimes against children that came out in the news. Whether there really was an increase in such crimes or because they were being reported more visibly I don't know. And if there was an increase in such crimes, I don't know what the driver of this would be and why they have become more numerous in the last 30 years vs., say, in the 1930s to 50s. In any case this helped increase the awareness of families about the dangers that children face. John Walsh's advocacy may have played a big role as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhBeeHave View Post
There's too much sexualization of young people on TV, in print ads, etc. I was appalled when some of the girls in my youngest child's 5th grade class were dating -- not just talking about it. Hand holding, kissing, too busy trying to be mature as opposed to being 10 years-old.

Last week I nearly keeled over when my now 13 year-old told me that one 8th grade couple were bragging about having sex. The girl said they did it for her 13th birthday. Whether they really did or didn't we'll never know, but I don't recall anyone in the JHS/middle school set bragging about having sex 35 years ago.
Fifth graders dating is new to me but 13-YOs having intercourse is something I would hear of as far back as the 80s. (Weren't Juliet Capulet and Marie Antionette supposedly 14/15 YOs when they first did it? Hehe, just kidding).

Some European countries (and apparently Quebec) have resigned themselves to this and instead visibly promote safe intercourse as a way of preventing STD.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2013, 08:51 PM
 
Location: Inis Fada
16,966 posts, read 34,708,189 times
Reputation: 7723
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forest_Hills_Daddy View Post
Back in the 1980s there was a whole slew of crimes against children that came out in the news. Whether there really was an increase in such crimes or because they were being reported more visibly I don't know. And if there was an increase in such crimes, I don't know what the driver of this would be and why they have become more numerous in the last 30 years vs., say, in the 1930s to 50s. In any case this helped increase the awareness of families about the dangers that children face. John Walsh's advocacy may have played a big role as well.



Fifth graders dating is new to me but 13-YOs having intercourse is something I would hear of as far back as the 80s. (Weren't Juliet Capulet and Marie Antionette supposedly 14/15 YOs when they first did it? Hehe, just kidding).
What was the Bard writing? Kiddie porn?

I graduated HS in the early 80's; in the late 70's 13 year-old's weren't bragging about having sex at that point in time/in that area. As Billy Joel sang, "Catholic girls start much too late..."
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-03-2013, 08:50 AM
 
Location: Suffolk County
77 posts, read 164,681 times
Reputation: 61
We played outside all the time. Mostly with matchbox cars, or on swing sets, we made forts and played capture the flag. Parents were pretty laid back compared to parents these days. We had a lot of freedom even by 4/5th grade. We biked and skateboarded around the neighborhood and going from house to house to find friends. As we grew older it was walking all around town from neighborhoods to the beach. We would meet up with friends along the way and get pizza. Most kids had jobs by 14 or played sports after school. We still went to school dances, something that isn't cool anymore I know.
I graduated in early 90s and sex wasn't something to brag about but was happening pretty often by 10th grade.
Most boys were older but there were a few girls in 8th grade I knew about.
I started hanging out in other towns as I got older and there were plenty of kids who were smoking and drinking by 11 and had even more freedom then I had.
My oldest is now in high school and I see first hand that kids are on a much tighter leash then they were 20 years ago. Things are different now and in my opinion scarier then they were back then.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-03-2013, 09:52 AM
 
Location: NY
254 posts, read 436,275 times
Reputation: 385
Back in the 70's when I was pre-teen years, we were able to walk to get pizza. Go to deli and buy baseball cards. Walk to the school and play baseball/football for hours at a time. Ride bikes for miles. Play tag in the woods. Ride mini bikes in the streets.

Things are different now. Somehow, people seem to have become a little more sick in the head! Crimes against children seem more prevalent now. No, I did not look for statistics, just going by what I see in the news. Illegal drugs are easy to get. When I grew up, people may have drank beer and smoked weed. Now we hear of kids hooked on heroin and prescription drugs.

I choose to keep my kids on a shorter leash. I have taught them right from wrong. I teach them to be good people and be good to others. As they have gotten a bit older, we have allowed them certain freedoms that we used to enjoy as kids. Cell phones have made it easier to keep in touch with them. My kids, or any kid, aren't perfect. I will allow them to make mistakes. It's all part of the journey that forms us into the individuals we become. No matter how old they are, they are still my babies!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:




Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York > Long Island

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top