[ashara]

Hi

I am staying with my 18 month old on the second floor of our apartment. We had previously got a noise complaint from our downstairs neighbor. I do know that we make some amount of noise with the baby learning to walk and falling often and then probably her cries and our walking (we do not tiptoe but walk what we consider "normally" though might be loud for them). I appreciate their coming and telling me and I genuinely tried to keep the noise (that I could control) down. But I still know that when I am rushing or walking with the baby maybe I forget to walk softly. Whenever they feel the noise is loud they bang the ceiling and then i try more to reduce the noise.

The baby has been traveling across the continent and was back only last week, so she is still adjusting to the timezone differences and wakes up very early in the morning and to make her adjusted I keep rocking her on the chair (for sure I will not letting her play early mornings before 6:30 am) .

Yesterday when the baby was crying (6:00 pm) they started banging the ceiling which made it worse since she got scared and cried more. There was not a soul moving about in the house or tv or anything but the baby crying in my husbands lap. The guy below came and told that there is noise and with all the exhaustion from the travel and a cranky baby and sleepless nights I told him I understand your problem and will cut down noise I can control but about the baby she needs time and I cannot control it much (being cold outside I cannot even take her outside all the time)). He seemed reasonable and told just tell me you will try. While we were talking the wife comes up and started going berserk about shutting my baby up and calling the cops etc . I told her to go ahead and call the cops if she thinks that will solve it. She used abusive language and then made racist comment about us and going back to our country.

I know that probably they are bothered by our noise level and I have no intention of doing so on purpose. But her racist and abusive comments kind of escalated things. Do I let it slide (I know I have done nothing intentionally wrong and am not scared of cops or anything) or do I report it to the leasing office or elsewhere for a record. I have an 8 month lease left else I would have moved to a ground floor to leave in peace (buying is not an option with us frequently moving)

Thanks you for your opinions/advise.

[MSchu]

just be thankful you live upstairs.

[von949]

Living in an apartment, those people have to understand that there is some acceptable noises that are going to be heard. I'm sure the walls are pretty thin also.

I guess you can call the cops about them harassing you. I spent about 8 years in dorm/apartment life. I was always in your neighbor's shoes. It was always different things keeping me up or waking me up...parties, babies, kids, TV, music, arguing, etc. I invested in earplugs and NyQuil. Never complained to anyone after that.

[MomMom]

The cops really don't need to be bothered by you calling them to report that you've been called a "racist name" they got other more important things to do. Hey, it's America and it's a free country. And the people downstairs are not harrassing you. They are not doing anything against the law.

That's what lawyers do, sue for defamation and libel, too bad you didn't record the rant from the woman.

Anyways, buy some cheap, large, room size area rugs (like at Big Lots) and put them around, even if there is already carpeting on your floor. Any sound proofing barrier you can do will help.

I'm sure the baby is not fussing for just a minute at a time, so I really would work on controlling the amount of time the baby is crying each time. And you complaining to the apartment management will more than likely get you no where. Perhaps your complaining neighbors are also complaining about you, you're the one making the noise. It's just one of the negatives of apartment living and the complainers should realize that as well.

Little noise once in a while should be acceptable. Lots of noise all the time constantly is not acceptable in my opinion.

[mod cut-- reference to deleted post]

[observer53]

Please limit your responses to actual helpful suggestions to the OP.

[ashara]

Originally Posted by MomMom

The cops really don't need to be bothered by you calling them to report that you've been called a "racist name" they got other more important things to do. Hey, it's America and it's a free country. And the people downstairs are not harrassing you. They are not doing anything against the law.

That's what lawyers do, sue for defamation and libel, too bad you didn't record the rant from the woman.

Anyways, buy some cheap, large, room size area rugs (like at Big Lots) and put them around, even if there is already carpeting on your floor. Any sound proofing barrier you can do will help.

I'm sure the baby is not fussing for just a minute at a time, so I really would work on controlling the amount of time the baby is crying each time. And you complaining to the apartment management will more than likely get you no where. Perhaps your complaining neighbors are also complaining about you, you're the one making the noise. It's just one of the negatives of apartment living and the complainers should realize that as well.

Little noise once in a while should be acceptable. Lots of noise all the time constantly is not acceptable in my opinion.

My point was not to complain to the cops. I do think they would have already complained a lot to the management and i want them to have a record of our side also (hence was checking if we should report it).

We do try to keep noise level down but with the baby some things are out of control. I wish it had a stop button to say yes you cried a whole 60 seconds now you stop. And about her fussing for long time I do not let it happen as think how annoying it is to me on the same floor if it is annoying to you downstairs.

I did tell the guy that if it is our walking, music or anything else bothering you, then bang and let me know. I will immediately bring it down else you can come over and check the reason for the noise. But when u start banging the ceiling as soon as the baby cries you just escalate the matter since she gets scared with the banging.

And even all that was fine until she went all crazy. Freedom of speech is important but so is respect for other.

[MomMom]

Originally Posted by ashara

My point was not to complain to the cops. I do think they would have already complained a lot to the management and i want them to have a record of our side also (hence was checking if we should report it).

We do try to keep noise level down but with the baby some things are out of control. I wish it had a stop button to say yes you cried a whole 60 seconds now you stop. And about her fussing for long time I do not let it happen as think how annoying it is to me on the same floor if it is annoying to you downstairs.

I did tell the guy that if it is our walking, music or anything else bothering you, then bang and let me know. I will immediately bring it down else you can come over and check the reason for the noise. But when u start banging the ceiling as soon as the baby cries you just escalate the matter since she gets scared with the banging.

And even all that was fine until she went all crazy. Freedom of speech is important but so is respect for other.

Then you got a legal suit on your tab, the apartment management or the police can't help you with that.

Good luck to you and I hope your situation resolves itself into an amicable arrangement between you and your downstairs neighbor!

[logline]

This is why I'll never live in a condo that doesn't have slab concrete between floors... no matter how much more it costs, it's totally worth it.

In the past, I've been on the receiving end of that noise (like your neighbor) and let me tell you: it's the most mentally anguishing experience ever. To literally lose sleep because of other people's actions... no matter how much they can't control it... is the worst way to live.

The racist comments from the neighbor were obviously wrong, but the frustration is real.

I agree that a large, densely-padded area rug will help with the noise dampening, but only a little. Try it and tell your neighbor about it so that they at least feel that you're taking action. Maybe showing effort will at least diffuse the raising tensions. You don't want this to get out of control.

[ElleTea]

Some people are not meant to live anyplace that they share walls with others. The guy downstairs needs to understand that when you do, you will sometimes be made aware that other people live nearby. He cannot expect there to be complete silence 24/7, if he does, he needs to live in a single family house, not an apartment. It also sucks when you live in a downstairs apartment because you will be more aware of those walking around above you...but from what you said it sounds like he is really overreacting. I would carefully document any other run-ins with the neighbor, including when he bangs on the ceiling and what would have caused the banging. I agree with trying an area rug to insulate the sound.

Another example would be my friend's neighbor. She owns a townhome in a large complex and her neighbor also should not live in a place that shares walls. They blast LOUD music at all hours of the day and night, are always working on their car and blocking the road. They have no respect for anyone around them. She has called the police about the music at 2 AM and as soon as the police leave they turn it up LOUDER.

Hopefully his lease is up soon!

[jet757f]

Get with the apartment management and although you are on a lease maybe they could move you to a different apt preferably downstairs.