Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I probably won't anyway....DD says she is never getting married (and it's highly possible!), DS hates little kids and will probably marry a woman who either doesn't want any or won't want to have them until she's older....by then, we'll be in the nursing home!
I've seen on a lot of threads here that a lot of people seem to be pressured by their parents to have kids (especially women). Their parents seem to be dead set on being grandparents.
But I have to ask: why? I can understand wanting kids, I myself would like kids (but not for a long time!!). But I'm pretty indifferent about grandkids.
So what's the deal? You'd think the whole "gotta have little ones" thing would go away after you've produced your litter.
Human beings real purpose on this earth is the same as all other species, and that is to survive and reproduce to carry on the genetic line. We use terms/phrases like "carry on the family name", but that only cloaks the aforementioned.
Sure we have emotions and strive for higher minded things, but the drive to reproduce is almost as strong as our survival instinct. This is the most basic explanation.
The other is that many parents might struggle raising kids, financially, emotionally, etc., but in the end, most enjoy the experience.
As a matter of fact, most parents actually look back and feel raising little Johnny & Mary were some of the best times of their lives. Since they can no longer have that, they look forward to grandkids to have a partial return to what their time with you was like. Having kids help parents to return to their childhood through playing games and having fun in ways that adults typically don't anymore. So grandkids give them a similar opportunity. Plus in most cases they no longer have the difficult issues to deal with, just the fun stuff. So they get to relive a wonderful time in their lives, help out their kids by watching the grandkids, but ultimately punching out on the time clock and relaxing in a way they couldn't as parents.
Since I have not read any of the replies, I suspect others have said similar things. It may be hard for you to understand at the moment, but once you become a parent, the light bulb will turn on.
I am not anxious to have grandchildren. My daughter has never been enamored of children, and she has said that she may never have kids. She's only 23, so we'll see, but if she doesn't, that's fine. I'm sure I would love my own grandchild, but I don't have a longing to be a grandmother.
As a matter of fact, five years ago or so when our daughters were going to their senior prom, I saw the mother of one of her classmates at the school where they were getting on the buses for the prom and we were all taking pictures. I knew that my daughter's classmate was her youngest, and that she, like me, was planning to bail out of our expensive town now that the kids were done with school.
I asked her what her plans were, and she sighed and said, "I just want so badly to be a grandmother." Her son was 27 and engaged, but had no immediate marriage plans, and she went on about how she wished they would get married and have a child so she could be Grandma. I was shocked by this response. We were FIFTY, for Christmas sake, and your kids are grown and you finally have free time and what you want for the next phase of your life is to be a grandmother???? Just couldn't relate. I was thinking I could take a vacation somewhere, pursue my writing, take some day trips to museums I never got to see when my daughter was growing up because of all the things I had to center around her activities.
Not all, not me. I think they want grandchildren because all their friends are bragging about theirs and pulling out the photos, etc. I have two that live across the country.
I didn't realize how YOUNG having a grandchild makes you feel. My little grandson just energizes me. He's 15 months old now, and is starting to be so much fun. Making up new games and things to amuse him has kind of reawakened the "kid" part of my brain. I'd rather be with him than do anything else.
Because they are the sweetest, most adorable, funniest little people on the face of this earth!
They sure are!!!! I count myself blessed that I can spend so much time with my little grandson. His other grandma has told me how lucky I am...she only sees him a couple of hours on the weekend, if that. Not her fault, she has a demanding fulltime job. I work part time as a cafeteria cook and have my afternoons free for him. I see him practically every day, because I babysit him in the afternoons. I love these pre-toddler years...every day is an adventure, seeing him discover and learn new things. And I'm always there to be a part of it.
I've seen on a lot of threads here that a lot of people seem to be pressured by their parents to have kids (especially women). Their parents seem to be dead set on being grandparents.
But I have to ask: why? I can understand wanting kids, I myself would like kids (but not for a long time!!). But I'm pretty indifferent about grandkids.
So what's the deal? You'd think the whole "gotta have little ones" thing would go away after you've produced your litter.
Obviously you are quite young, if you intend to have kids much later. This is something you will just have to experience. There are some seniors who really don't care if they have grandkids, but many of us do. My grands are the lights of my life. I loved them before they were born, just like I did my own kids.
This isn't necessarily something that can be explained.
I've seen on a lot of threads here that a lot of people seem to be pressured by their parents to have kids (especially women). Their parents seem to be dead set on being grandparents.
But I have to ask: why? I can understand wanting kids, I myself would like kids (but not for a long time!!). But I'm pretty indifferent about grandkids.
So what's the deal? You'd think the whole "gotta have little ones" thing would go away after you've produced your litter.
Some in here believe it's to get even with their kids.
I have three grown children, one married and already divorced (sigh).
IMHO, most parents want grandchildren to help right some of the things they may have screwed up the first time around. Believe me, every parent has 20-20 hindsight, and my wife and I are firmly in that group. If/when we have grandchildren we'll do our best to keep our kids from making the same mistakes we made with them.
Besides, we miss having little grommets running around the house. The term "they grow up so fast" has never rung so true. Now I'm feeling all "cats in the cradle" melancholy... though my sons make time for us.
I've seen on a lot of threads here that a lot of people seem to be pressured by their parents to have kids (especially women). Their parents seem to be dead set on being grandparents.
But I have to ask: why? I can understand wanting kids, I myself would like kids (but not for a long time!!). But I'm pretty indifferent about grandkids.
So what's the deal? You'd think the whole "gotta have little ones" thing would go away after you've produced your litter.
Well, I've never pressured my kids to have children, but the reason I hoped they would is because raising children is the most worthwhile experience a person can have, and I wouldn't want my kids to miss out on it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.