Have You Had to Distance Yourself From Your Grandchildren? (parents, kids, old)
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Has anyone else here had to make the tough and extremely painful choice to be out of their grandchildren's lives because they were being used as emotional blackmail by their parents?
My son and his first wife use to use emotional blackmail on me and the other grandma. It worked on the other grandma but not on me and yes, I did distance myself from them.
I have seen other grandparents being told "If you don't do this, I'll take the kids and you'll never see them again!".. so they give in and there is no end to the demands they make after that.
My son and his first wife use to use emotional blackmail on me and the other grandma. It worked on the other grandma but not on me and yes, I did distance myself from them.
I have seen other grandparents being told "If you don't do this, I'll take the kids and you'll never see them again!".. so they give in and there is no end to the demands they make after that.
Thanks for responding, Laura. After dealing with paying rent, electric & gas bills, car payments, sending grocery orders via online ordering, etc... and then being turned against when I had no more to give, I had to finally step back. Matter of fact, my entire family have also done so, as has the family of my daughter's husband. They have gone through every single one of us, and some family members are out over $50,000 due to helping them. Whoever was helping them at the time was "the greatest" but as soon as they were told that there were no more funds left to help them they would spread vicious lies to other members of the family as well as to friends. My own daughter went on the internet and told people she had seen me having sex with a neighbor when she was a child (a complete and absolute lie!) and that after divorcing her father I'd had an affair with a married man! After her husband's family told them they needed to get jobs and a place to live they spread lies that her husband's step-father was abusing their girls. Its been like this for the past 10 years. I must add that when my daughter was young I had lots of problems with her...habitual lying, drugs, promiscuity, etc... A psychiatrist diagnosed her as pyschopathic personality. I had hoped one day she would grow up and change, but it hasn't happened
A psychiatrist diagnosed her as pyschopathic personality. I had hoped one day she would grow up and change, but it hasn't happened
I'm sorry about your situation.
A "psychopathic personality" is not a recognized mental disorder. Could you perhaps give me the name of her diagnosis? If it's Antisocial Personality Disorder, she will never grow out of it.
A "psychopathic personality" is not a recognized mental disorder. Could you perhaps give me the name of her diagnosis? If it's Antisocial Personality Disorder, she will never grow out of it.
This was the diagnosis during the year 1991, so I imagine nowdays it would be called something else. Basically, she has no feelings of guilt for ANYTHING wrong she does, and I was told she probably never would, hence the diagnosis of psychopathy.
Cyanna, I`m sorry that you`re having to deal with this. It`s very painful. Psychopaths, unfortunately never change.They get worse with time.
Thank you for your kind words, And you are right, as we are all learning. She will only get worse. It doesn't help that she met her husband when he was fresh out of prison for felony crimes. He's as bad as she is. They had three children before bothering to get married, all courtesy of the American tax payer & the Govt. and they plan to keep having more until they get the boy they want. This is spite of the doctors tellling my daughter that each pregnancy puts her at risk for death or a child born with disibilities. They both use drugs, drink and party and the Social Services went to check them out after my daughter nearly killed my oldest granddaughter in an auto accident by running a stop sign in the snow. My granddaughter spent a month in a coma and two months in the hospital with pieces of her skull removed. Social Services said they were 'loving and fit parents.' Two weeks after my daughter had that accident she got a ticket for speeding in a school zone, and then acted like it was funny and the cops were wrong for ticketing her.
Cyanna, what really sucks about this situation is that a lot of times the kids turn out to be pathalogical too. But some do not. When your grandkids turn 18 and they want out of that situation, then you could be there for them.
I am so close to giving up. I have been through hell and back trying to help these kids. They live in a very dysfunctional life style and everything I did to help has come back and bit me. I'm so tired of it. So yes I am thinking of distancing myself from them and I am seeing signs as they are taking the same path as their mother. So sad.
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After her husband's family told them they needed to get jobs and a place to live they spread lies that her husband's step-father was abusing their girls. Its been like this for the past 10 years. I must add that when my daughter was young I had lots of problems with her...habitual lying, drugs, promiscuity, etc... A psychiatrist diagnosed her as pyschopathic personality. I had hoped one day she would grow up and change, but it hasn't happened 
