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Exactly, and when you look beyond the superficial, there are so many qualities that factor into what makes someone attractive. Someone can seem meh from across the room or in a photograph, but something about the way they present themselves and carry on a conversation is magnetic.
Me personally, there is no rhyme or reason to what I find attractive; it's not about a specific body type, coloring, or facial feature (even if that is what may initially catch my eye).
Quote:
Originally Posted by G0DDESS
You may not be everyone's cup of tea - but you're somebody's shot of Vodka. Believe it.
It does not matter if you are, or are not ugly. Your perception depends upon what you are told, and how you are treated. We internalize these things. You just need to decide that you are awesome.
I know I was OK looking when I was young, but now that I am older, I do not feel attractive at all. I will not have pictures taken, because I hate how they look. I know, however, that people still seem to react favorably to me, so it must be mostly in my own head, and I have decided not to worry about it.
If you think about it, when you meet other people, what is it that you respond to? Is it the way they look, or is it their personality and the way they make you feel?
I think beauty comes from within. I'd like to cite Betty Davis. I'm sure people run the gamut of what they think of her appearance. But she was classy and knew how to carry herself. She exuded confidence and could be quite glamourous. When you see pictures of her - just normal pictures - she's not some stunning beauty.
Still on topic sort of: Has anyone noticed the little attention getting windows that say "10 childhood stars who grew up to be ugly" OR "The ugliest actors alive" WTHeck?? More like "10 childhood stars who grew up to be NORMAL"
Beauty is on the inside. You be content with who you are and what you have. Love life. Love people. Love this world. That's beautiful!
Since I was a little girl I've been told I was pretty. Strangers would stop my mom and tell her. Little boys liked me. As I got older it increased-a lot of attention from men and when I go out people would tell me I was pretty. I remember once just going into the store with my mom and this lady gasped when she looked up at me and said "omg she is so pretty". Last year at my old job there was this old pervy security guard that used to stop to tell me how beautiful my face was and that I should be a model. I've had guys make songs about my a$$ and I constantly had issues with women(other) because they saw me as competition. When I was in highschool I would be out with my family and my dad and guys would still try to holla not giving a f*** that my dad was mean mugging them. Every guy I've dated there relatives or friends have tried to get with me on the low. I could go on but that is initially how I came to the conclusion that I was attractive to others.
The thing is even with all that happening I didnt feel attractive to myself. I was critical of myself a lot when I was younger. I didnt think I was very attractive no matter how many others thought I was. Honestly I didnt love myself and because of that all the compliments and validation in the world didnt matter to me. My point is that attractiveness is really based on YOU. These days there are many attractive women-made by a plastic surgeon and they still aren't happy with how they look. How you feel about yourself is the most important opinion you could ever count on or need in determining your beauty or worth. If you love yourself and treat yourself right you, you will look in the mirror and feel good about what you see even if others can't see it yet.
When I look in the mirror at myself I think to myself: "yeah I'm a bad b****." And at the end of the day that's all that matters.
Truthfully while I get told Im attractive a lot, there are probably many that wouldn't find me attractive since its relative anyway... Which is probably another reason why counting on others to tell you your attractive is never good--attraction varies from person to person.
It's funny too. Sometimes I see someone off the bat that I don't think is attractive and then after I get to know them all of the sudden they look great to me, I start to notice features and qualities that I find beautiful on there face. Those features were always there.. But it was the confidence, self love, and kindness that radiated from within that I saw that made them attractive in my eyes.
Most passers by will not look at ugly people - they're invisible. Therefore, you're probably attractive in one way or another. Perhaps you're "striking" rather than beautiful.
Also, are you familiar with the French term "jolie laide"? The literal meaning is "beautiful ugly." But it refers to a kind of woman who is not conventionally beautiful, but who may be very attractive for some reason - her magnetic personality, her penetrating eyes, her vivid coloring, whatever.
Why don't you stop brooding about it? Most people can look more attractive - by a different haircut, makeup, manner of dressing, etc. Try that, if you want. But don't let it worry you. By the way, in my experience, just being "nice" isn't necessarily a route to making a lot of friends. It's often much more relevant to be interesting, cheery, outgoing.
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