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Lots could change once Max is a little older and neutered. If neither cat is getting hurt, they will eventually learn to like or at least tolerate each other.
If you continue to have problems, ask your vet about a calming spray. I don't remember the name of it. It is available at pet stores though. My vet suggested it when one of our cats was ill and the others were less than sypathetic towards him. (They hissed and spit at him.) I didn't end up using the spray because he ended up having to be in a room by himself, so there was no need.
If you continue to have problems, ask your vet about a calming spray. I don't remember the name of it. It is available at pet stores though. My vet suggested it when one of our cats was ill and the others were less than sypathetic towards him. (They hissed and spit at him.) I didn't end up using the spray because he ended up having to be in a room by himself, so there was no need.
I've tried that too, except I used it in an air freshner form. She said that alot of cats react to it, but apparently my two don't. It's very expensive too. It's called Feliway.
Here's a cute picture of Max that I just took today. He was exhausted after playing so hard.
Oh my gosh, you are describing Max to a T !! maybe male kitties are a little wilder than females, because I have raised two female cats, and while they had wild streaks in them, it pales in comparison to Max. Everyone is telling me he will calm down after he is fixed, I hope so. The problem is, I feel so badly for him, knowing he has to have an operation soon.
I think youre right...males are wilder in the beginning. My first male was neutered way too early (which may be why he suffered from bone-related issues, I have read this happens if a male is neutered too early) so he never acted this way. I feel bad about getting him snipped too, I hate it actually, but I know it is the most responsible thing to do. My cats are 100% indoor kitties, (and I am extremely careful), but on the off-chance that he DID get out, I would not want to be worried about him knocking up all the female cats roaming around and creating more unwanted kitties...plus he will be calmer and more relaxed, and will not be getting so many time-outs! Lol! Hang in there...we will get through it!!!
Some of you know my story of how I rescued a kitten back in October. His name is Max. He was in very bad shape, within a day or two of death the vet said. I've given him a loving home with good medical care, and am thankful to say he is healthy today. Max is going on 6 months old.
I have another beautiful kitty, named Misty. She's about to turn 7 next week.
When I first brought Max into our home Misty attacked him with no reason. I know now that she was telling him "hey kid, this is MY turf ", but at the time he was only 8 ounces, and the poor thing was defenseless, so I punished her ( I did NOT hurt her, btw ) and she finally stopped attacking him.
Now that Max is growing and is healthy, it seems the tables have turned. Max chases Misty up the stairs and hounds her relentlessly. She is a nervous wreck and has lost enough hair to build another cat. Max also bites me every time I go to touch him, and I have done everything that people have suggested to discipline him to get him to stop. Nothing. He still chases and hounds Misty, he still bites. Misty spends 99% of the time living upstairs between two rooms, and Max invades her territory.
I have spoken to the vet several times about this, and all she says is that Max is a kitten, and he'll grow out of it. For a little while Misty was getting better and coming downstairs, but something must have happened between the two of them when I wasn't around, because she went back to rarely coming downstairs and shen she does, he acts like he is going to go after her, she runs and he chases her. From what I can see he is not attacking her. She is 3 times his size ! The few times I've seen Misty cuff and go after Max to get him away from her, I have praised her, because I feel that I scared her out of going after Max. I want Misty to stick up for herself, and not live in fear or be nervous. I just don't want her attacking and hurting him, nor do I want him to attack or harrass her.
Can anyone give me some advice please ? I have tried everything. I love both my babies and want them both happy and content. But Misty was in our home first, and I want Max to respect that.
Dear Mainegirl. There is a product you can but that is a inter feline friendly pheremone called Feliway catfaeries.com/feliway.html.
It is supposed to work wonders on kitties that don't get along. I have never tried it, but have heard many wonderful things. I sure hope you end up with a peaceful household. I recently had been given a full blooded Siamese and I couldn't get the baby of the house, My Rascal who wouldn't give Romeo any peace, it was all out war as a matter of fact. SO I had to find Romeo another home.
Also, I was wondering how you managed to post pictures onto your thread posting. Would you mind explaining it to me?? Thank you so much and good luck!!!
Dear Mainegirl. There is a product you can but that is a inter feline friendly pheremone called Feliway catfaeries.com/feliway.html.
It is supposed to work wonders on kitties that don't get along. I have never tried it, but have heard many wonderful things. I sure hope you end up with a peaceful household. I recently had been given a full blooded Siamese and I couldn't get the baby of the house, My Rascal who wouldn't give Romeo any peace, it was all out war as a matter of fact. SO I had to find Romeo another home.
Also, I was wondering how you managed to post pictures onto your thread posting. Would you mind explaining it to me?? Thank you so much and good luck!!!
Monica (crazycatgirl)
Hi Monica, thanks for the tip. I have tried Feliway, they make it in an electric room freshner fornat, and it's very expensive. I would pay anything to make them both happy and calm, but unfortunately it didn't work for me. Little by little things are calming down, but Max is a real rascal and he keeps doing things to irritate Misty. He's being a "kid brother" I guess.
Regarding how to attach pictures to your posts, I will pm you the information, as I think they don't like it when people get off topcis in threads.
Weeks later and no changes in Max's behavior. I spoke with a cat behaviorist yesterday, and she gave me a lot of advice.
She told me the biggest mistake I made was to discipline Misty when she attacked Max when he was very little. Because cats have a pecking order, Misty was doing her job, although it appeared to me at the time that she was attacking him for no reason. I was afraid she was going to seriously hurt or kill him, because he was so tiny and deathly sick at first.
I now have to go buy an expensive dog crate and put Max in that for hour or so intervals, while allowing Misty to walk around the living room. I will make it comfy for him, and place toys etc.
Misty sees Max and she takes off running, so Max chases her and doesn't let up until they get into a confrontation. In the meantime Misty is over grooming due to stress, and she's throwing up hair balls left and right. This woman I spoke to says putting Max in a crate will calm down his urge to chase her, and Misty will feel more at ease and gain some of her territory back.
Regarding Max's biting, I have to stop picking him up. She thinks he was "over handled" when he was little. He can come to me for affection, and I can pet him then, but once he starts the biting I have to get up and walk away from him. She doesn't want me saying "NO" or anything like that. It doesn't make sense, but this woman has been doing this for 15 years, so I am going to take her advice and hope that it helps.
Regarding Max's biting, I have to stop picking him up. She thinks he was "over handled" when he was little. He can come to me for affection, and I can pet him then, but once he starts the biting I have to get up and walk away from him. She doesn't want me saying "NO" or anything like that. It doesn't make sense, but this woman has been doing this for 15 years, so I am going to take her advice and hope that it helps.
Think of it as "any attention is good attention."
I remember when my kitten was about that age. He was a terror! I thought we'd never get through it. But now that he's almost 5, he's a sweetie. Oh, he still has his moments, but nothing like when he was a 'teenager.'
He can come to me for affection, and I can pet him then, but once he starts the biting I have to get up and walk away from him. She doesn't want me saying "NO" or anything like that. It doesn't make sense, but this woman has been doing this for 15 years, so I am going to take her advice and hope that it helps.
Mainegirl - I agree with KansasSky, it makes perfect sense in that negative attention is much better than no attention at all.
Is Max neutered yet? It will take a while for all the hormones to get out of his system, but it should help to a degree (what degree is different in each individual cat).
I think you need to set realistic goals. You may have to accept the fact that the two may never like each other. We humans tend not to like this for we think they all should like each other. It doesn't always work out that way. So what you need to think about is what sort of "comfortable living scenario" you can work to achieve. With patience, you will be able to reach the stage of a "cease fire" where at least there's no fighting/chasing/stress. Ignoring is fine, fighting is not.
I know from experience what you're going through and it's not fun, no.
It's great you called a behaviorist in and from what you've described, her advice seems sound. It's all too often that people just give up, much to the detriment of the cats. You are actively working to try to reach a solution - and that's great. It's not easy and I'm sure you'll have days where you'll think you've gone back to square one, but hang in there. What you must not do is feel that you've failed in some way because the two cats don't get along. You have to put it into context - you just have two cats that do not like each other, but can learn to get along and can learn to peaceably co-exist in the same household.
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It's called Feliway. 
