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Guess we'll have to agree to disagree.
Squirting a kitten that young who is just playing and causing no harm is wrong in my book. It is the equivilent to hitting a young puppy for wetting on the floor. I guess I should have used that analogy first. My intent was say they are both babies! I would not want to break a kitten of his playful nature. Again...JMO
I know a hundred breeders who would reject your application for one of their kittens had you said on an app. you'd punish a kitten at 12 weeks for being playful.
I read an article today that Jackson Galaxy posted regarding punishing cats, and squirting them with water was one of the punishment mentioned. It stated that this does more harm than good, they will just associate you with that water bottle. I don't want my cats to fear me. They know who is boss here, they are. A kitten is doing what a kitten does. I have a six month old kitten who terrorizes a couple of my cats. They will play with him a bit, but he never gives up.
I usually separate them when I see it getting out of hand, and play with him with one of his toys until he gets bored and finds another activity.
Geez, it's like working in a preschool sometimes with this little guy.
I had to tell my husband not to ever punish my cat. Like many guys, especially ones raised on a steady diet of discipline from ol' Dad, he doesn't understand any other means to behavior alteration than punishment. My issue is that...it usually doesn't even work. Other means pretty much always work better in most cases--particularly with cats.
I'm trying to teach him to redirect and reward. I've gotten him to understand that you basically won't teach the cat anything by punishing him...except that you are a big jerk. Now when Nimbus does something he doesn't like, he grabs him and cradles him and gives him exaggerated snuggles and smooches and ruffles his fur, until he squirms and bolts and runs off to fix his fur and recover his dignity.
And he wonders why the cat doesn't snuggle on him voluntarily...
At least I think we're past the point of giving the cat Doritos.
I had to tell my husband not to ever punish my cat. Like many guys, especially ones raised on a steady diet of discipline from ol' Dad, he doesn't understand any other means to behavior alteration than punishment. My issue is that...it usually doesn't even work. Other means pretty much always work better in most cases--particularly with cats.
I'm trying to teach him to redirect and reward. I've gotten him to understand that you basically won't teach the cat anything by punishing him...except that you are a big jerk. Now when Nimbus does something he doesn't like, he grabs him and cradles him and gives him exaggerated snuggles and smooches and ruffles his fur, until he squirms and bolts and runs off to fix his fur and recover his dignity.
And he wonders why the cat doesn't snuggle on him voluntarily...
At least I think we're past the point of giving the cat Doritos.
You have a cat named Nimbus, we have a cat named Nimrod (not the kitten though). And yeah, he loves Doritos.
I have had that same experience, I stay out of it. They will work it out. Sure, grumpy old cat gets some activity, keeps them young. Our Siamese was so disgusted with the kitten, he started marking, a 12 year old nuetered cat, randomly started marking. He hated the kitten.
Pay back is a beech though, same kitten who terrorized the old Siamese, was himself a crotchety old man cat, and you guessed it....he got a kitten! Beau was not so bad though, he felt Mickey was not clean enough, so he would routinely lick Mickey from top to bottom, ears included. Then, he would bite him a bit. Mickey was pretty much just hanging on the bed and walk to the food dish and cat box every so often. So, he let Beau have free rein.
My kitten is always diving on my 10 yr old cat. My older cat gives her a pop if she gets too rough. I let her do that. No claws are out but the kitten backs off. I let her take charge. She never hurts her. I think it will work out in time.
I'm in the exact same situation. I have a male bengal cat that was born in december 2014 and a 4 year old mixed breed female cat who's best buddy (another bengal) had passed in june 2014. She tolerates the kitten for the most part but is constantly being ambushed/taunted by him. He is just trying to play, but it has left many scratch marks on the older cats back (the kitten now has soft paws on his claws). Sometimes the kitten will be calm and sweet, trying to clean the older one and rub up against her, and she still hisses at him even though he isn't in play mode. I hope that I can get the two cats to calm down and start appreciating one another.
We have a five-month old kitten, who is great, except for one problem: he annoys our older cat (four years old) very frequently with aggressive play behavior. What he does is when the older cat is resting or doing something else, he will run up to her, wrap his paws around her neck and try to start a play fight, and he starts trying to wrestle her.
She hates this and hisses and shrieks when he does this, and she also slaps him. But he is not getting the message.
This has been going on for a month now (we've had him almost two months) but it's getting worse. It happens several times an hour, and it bothers me to hear all the shrieking from the older cat. The worst part is that it's very much impeding their relationship. The older cat accepts him, but gets mad when he tries to do this. The kitten just wants to play, but he's very rough and has actually rubbed the fur entirely off her neck where he grabs her. She is now avoiding him, which is sad. They get along but are not friends at all, and it's sad because our other cat (who died a few months ago) and our older cat were best friends who cuddled and groomed all the time.
If the kitten keeps doing this, I fear their relationship will be irreperably harmed and they will never be friends. I know kittens are very playful but this kitten is not getting the message about when it's okay to engage in aggressive play (like when they're already playing and chasing) and when it's not okay (like when the other cat is resting).
What can I do? Whenever I see him about to do it I reprimand him, but he's not getting the picture. I could spray him with water, but I don't want the other cat to think she's doing something wrong.
Can you give an update? I'm in the exact same situation with my cats. Male 4 month old bengal who has play aggression toward my female 4 year old mixed breed who lost a 5yr old male bengal companion in june 2014. The older one is confident and stands her ground (not aggressively, but she has that side to her if she feels she has to use it..which i'm nervous may happen one of these days) but she is constantly taunted/hunted/followed/annoyed by the little. She's growling/hissing/and defending herself/running away from him often.
Has it improved? How long did it take? Anything I can do?
I don't think he's the alpha cat--he always rolls over onto his back in submission when he and the other cat are playing, and when I give them a special treat, she eats all of hers and most of his, and he doesn't complain. Also, he has never tried to slap her but she always slaps him. If he is in a spot she wants to be in, she growls and he moves. All these things point to her being the alpha cat, but maybe he wants to be the alpha.
I would say the older cat "flies" at him. The shrieking is like what you'd hear if two cats were fighting outside. It's loud and it's a little scary quite frankly. No one is ever injured but the sounds she makes are really loud. He never utters a peep interestingly. I'd never heard such noises from her until he started doing this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kate.w.
I have the same problem. Our new kitten came to us by default and is living in a house full of pensioner pets. He only wants to wrestle our huge, gentle, 13yr male cat " Al" . Al stopped coming home which was devastating for us (and him) . Its important to stick up for your older cat and understand your kitten. After Al saw that i was trying to stop the kitten and petted him after stopping the attacks he started coming home again. The kitten is only being a kitten and Al is only being Al so its very hard. I pop the kitten into the bathroom for 5 min ( 5 min only and ONLY and directly after his " attack") so he calms down otherwise he does not stop. I also have them in different rooms at night not changing Als rutine sleeping space and obviously not the bathroom. Its a pain in the butt for all and i cant wait for the kitten ( Bear) to grow out of it. Any suggestions for anything else from anyone would be much appreciated.
Can you give an update? I'm in the exact same situation with my cats. Male 4 month old bengal who has play aggression toward my female 4 year old mixed breed who lost a 5yr old male bengal companion in june 2014. The older one is confident and stands her ground (not aggressively, but she has that side to her if she feels she has to use it..which i'm nervous may happen one of these days) but she is constantly taunted/hunted/followed/annoyed by the little. She's growling/hissing/and defending herself/running away from him often.
Has it improved? How long did it take? Anything I can do?
I'm probably not going to be much help, as I've never lived with a Bengal. But from what I've learned from tv & posts here on C-D, they are a very active, high energy breed. He's still a young kitten, and might grow out of some of that kitten aggression, but you might want to have more or longer play sessions with him anyway, to tire him out. You might also consider leash training him for outside walks & extra exercise.... might not hurt.
I would love to hear an update, doglover29. We have a 12 year old calico and 3 weeks ago adopted a 6-month old kitten. The kitten is in his own room when we are at work during the day and at night. The kitten has recently started attacking the older cat---like you said, arms wrapped around the cat's neck and biting. I actually wish the older cat would perhaps bite back, but she just hisses and growls. We think they need to work it out, but we certainly don't want anyone to get hurt, or even our 12-yr-old to hide from now on. Time will help I think, it's only been 3 weeks, but just wondered about other opinions as to if we are doing the right things
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meldykstra
Can you give an update? I'm in the exact same situation with my cats. Male 4 month old bengal who has play aggression toward my female 4 year old mixed breed who lost a 5yr old male bengal companion in june 2014. The older one is confident and stands her ground (not aggressively, but she has that side to her if she feels she has to use it..which i'm nervous may happen one of these days) but she is constantly taunted/hunted/followed/annoyed by the little. She's growling/hissing/and defending herself/running away from him often.
Has it improved? How long did it take? Anything I can do?
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doglover29, how are the cats doing now?
