Your experiences in online dating for senior citizens (retired people). (gorgeous, father-in-law)
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I think it would pay to list some red flags for those planning to try OLD....
#1 -- He/she writes to you several times, even talks on the phone and texts, but whenever you plan to meet up, they always have a reason they can't. Real reason they can't....they either used a fake picture, or they're married.
#2 -- Sends you dirty pictures of themselves
#3 -- Complains about needing money for something, or says can't afford to come meet you.
#4 -- "Plans" to meet you, and then has some bizarre story of why they can't, or something happened to their bank account/credit card so they can't get a ticket, etc .
Catfisher's that want to scam people often use these ruses.
The "best" crop of partners, at least women, are likely already in a relationship. The free sites like POF attract the lowest common denominator - people who are just casually looking, people who don't find online dating valuable enough to pay for Match or whatever, people of lower socioeconomic status, etc.
That's true for younger people but for older people, they are often alone because their spouse died. So there are some very wonderful people out there who are older.
I was looking when I was about 56/57 and the men were full of themselves OR married. At that age the good ones were already taken. That's why I turned to the UK--he's sweet and kind and can be silly and fun. But he is not perfect--don't ask, lol.
I think it would pay to list some red flags for those planning to try OLD....
#1 -- He/she writes to you several times, even talks on the phone and texts, but whenever you plan to meet up, they always have a reason they can't. Real reason they can't....they either used a fake picture, or they're married.
#2 -- Sends you dirty pictures of themselves
#3 -- Complains about needing money for something, or says can't afford to come meet you.
#4 -- "Plans" to meet you, and then has some bizarre story of why they can't, or something happened to their bank account/credit card so they can't get a ticket, etc .
Catfisher's that want to scam people often use these ruses.
The free site that most people use is Plenty of fish. Sadly, the ratio of men to women is a big problem. Most men won't get any traction unless they make it clear they have money or their picture shows somebody that has aged handsomely. The women, getting so many responses, tend to be very picky even though they might just be average looking at best. I went on a few dates that were a bust. The talking about their ex-husbands were is a real mood killer. Another woman had her mother drive her to the coffee shop. When I asked if she did not drive, she confided that her license had been taken away for a DWI. After about 20 minutes her mother returned and that was the end. Many women will write back a few times and then you never hear from them again. So overall it is a mixed bag at best. I did meet one nice woman. But after awhile I began to think that it was "even a blind pig finds and acorn every once in awhile."
Won't comment back about the computer stuff as I don't wish this thread to go too "off-topic" either, but regarding the above I never said it was, I said most "senior" dating sites consider themselves to be for 50 and up which to me is a pretty wide range to begin with. I do not consider myself a "senior" at all and don't think I will for quite a long time......
I started dating at 60 after a few years of widowhood.
I had hoped to meet another Mr. Right.
Instead, I met Mr. Wrong, Mr. Bitter, Mr. Can't-Tell-The-Truth-if-His-Life-Depended-On-It, Mr. Still-Married-But-My-Wife-Doesn't-Understand-Me, Mr. I'll-Never-Trust-Another-Woman-Again, Mr. I-Feel-Like-I'm-Cheating-On-My-Dead-Wife-Even-Though-She's-Been-Gone-For-Ten-Years, Mr. Given-Up-On-Life, Mr. Looking-For-A-Purse, Mr. Looking-For-A-Nurse, Mr. Looking-For-A-Purse-AND-A-Nurse and, believe it or not, Mr. I'm-Pretty-Sure-I'm-Gay-But-I'll-Give-It-Another-Try-With-A-Woman. Oh, and a few more of their cousins.
FINALLY, I met Mr. Right ten years ago and I grabbed him tight. We're sailing off into the sunset together.
I'm 72. About three years ago, I tried online dating -- Match.com and OurTime.com. I met and dated a few interesting men, then had a very unpleasant experience with a man who had a very casual relationship with the truth. When I broke off that relationship, he became a cyberstalker, and it took a long time to get him to leave me alone. After that I said no more online dating.
Although my daughter and her husband met online and are very happy in their relationship, they are not seniors. I think it generally is different for people of our generation. It's so different from when we were younger, when we met people at school or at work and got to know them a bit before dating them. Online dating felt rushed to me. I much prefer the slower pace of the olden days: my late husband I met at work and we worked closely together as friends for a year before we started dating.
I'm curious to know why you think it's different with seniors. Seem dishonesty knows no age limit.
I'm curious to know why you think it's different with seniors. Seem dishonesty knows no age limit.
1) most older men online want women younger than their own age (if not most, it is still very often and frequently)
2) at older ages, one often does not have the degree of attractiveness, allure, and strong sexuality of one's physical looks, that one may have had at younger ages
3) older women are often not valued by many older men, in online dating.
4) finding compatible beliefs, philosophy, values is not easy - especially at older ages online
5) too many undesirable men online (on various levels of existence)
6) as one poster stated upthread, one needs to realize that one will want to date only one out of a hundred people with online profiles (if even that) - and the endurance it takes to go through so many unproductive dates (or talking with) can be deterring
Last edited by matisse12; 06-28-2019 at 04:41 PM..
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