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How is that insulting? As I get older, I choose to not get caught up in things like cliques. They are not on my radar and I wouldn't even notice them because I just don't have the time.
I missed where the insult was as well. Anyone that worries about gossip and cliques in their retirement years has got to reframe things a bit, if you ask me.
If a '55+ Community' is a concentration of senior citizens with many organized activities, then it could be called a Senior Concentration Camp.
No thanks!
That is silly. Residents are not locked in to the community. In my 55+ there are MANY who still work full or part time among the younger folks, and almost all even up into their 80's still drive at least on the side streets outside the community. Family and friends come in here to visit frequently. Many of our clubs are open to "outsiders", including art, photography, yoga, both political parties, ceramics, etc. The golf course is open for a fee. We can bring guests to the indoor and outdoor pools, as well as to the potlucks, music performances, ice cream socials, dances, etc. (sometimes these guests like it so much they end up moving in!) It may not be for you, but it isn't a concentration camp.
That is silly. Residents are not locked in to the community. In my 55+ there are MANY who still work full or part time among the younger folks, and almost all even up into their 80's still drive at least on the side streets outside the community. Family and friends come in here to visit frequently. Many of our clubs are open to "outsiders", including art, photography, yoga, both political parties, ceramics, etc. The golf course is open for a fee. We can bring guests to the indoor and outdoor pools, as well as to the potlucks, music performances, ice cream socials, dances, etc. (sometimes these guests like it so much they end up moving in!) It may not be for you, but it isn't a concentration camp.
We moved to a 55+ 6.5 years ago and it was a great move. Single family homes, with enough land between homes, plus it's a golf community. Yeah, there is some gossip going on, but no more than anyplace else. We have a 38,000 sq foot clubhouse, with indoor pool, Golf pro shop, fitness center, ballroom, 4 table pool room, card rooms and a restaurant. Plus, 4 tennis courts and 3 lighted bocce courts. It's truly resort living.
People here are very active or you could do nothing and keep to yourself.
The funny thing is if one isn't looking for something, then they usually won't find it. While I would never live in such a community, if I did, I'm sure I would never even notice any cliques if they did exist. I just don't get involved like that to even take notice. Nor would I expend the mental/emotional energy to get upset about said cliques.
At retirement age, who has time to give a s*it?
Was the op looking for something? Seems to me she observed some behaviors and is reacting to avoid them . I don’t see the op mentioning spending a great deal of time getting upset about it.
We have lived in 2 different 55+ communities and wouldn't be anywhere else. Yes, there can be come cliques, but personally I have seen that same thing wherever we have lived, and from high school onward. People are going to be what they were in life before they turned 55+. In both places there are so many things to do, and people to do them with, that you can easily avoid those clique people. In fact they usually end up just being in their own little space as others ignore them.
And people are definitely not pushed into participating in anything. In fact we rarely take any of the bus trips as I get motion sickness and can't really do busses. DH did go on one that he really wanted to do. There are people here that no one really ever sees. They just keep to themselves and that is fine with everyone else. We all understand that everyone has their own wishes and needs. Plus we help everyone out when necessary. We have a volunteer group that organizes meals, etc. when someone is sick or in the hospital. There are lots of volunteer activities and charity type items that anyone can participate. Plus most 55+ communities are full of people who have moved into the area and therefore are in the same position of looking for new friends and activities. In regular communities people have lived there for many years they already have their groups and friends.
I do understand that the 55+ communities are not for every one, but no one can tell you what you will like until you experience it for yourself, especially someone who has never lived in one but only spouts what they THINK it is like. There are still people here who work and some very interesting people who have travelled a lot and are a fountain of stories and information. Each community is different with a different vibe. I encourage you to maybe try to rent in one and see what it is like. One of the nice things is that since most are retired you can usually find someone available to go out to lunch or to a movie, etc. instead of everyone having to work all the time. Again, only you can decide if it is for you.
I mostly didn't regret it.* They had some initial reservations (since, well, a young whippersnapper and his partyin' an' drinkin' ways an' all that loud music into 3:00 at night? GET OFF MY LAWN!!!) but they took to me well since I'm generally quiet and mostly keep to myself. Since it was mostly 70+-somethings at the time they sure enjoyed and appreciated having a younger bloke around to help them with various chores, tech support and such. What I regretted was there wasn't anybody around my age to associate with, but they were nonetheless mostly very nice people to be around and the stories some of them could tell if you asked.
* So what on earth was I doing living in a 55+ condo development in my 20s? Long story short, high school/college buddy's uncle left the condo to him and I rented it for a couple years for super, super cheap.
I ultimately moved because there had been a couple burglaries and a murder (all gang-related) committed in the adjacent residential development within a couple days of each other and two carjackings in the apartment complex across the road the week before I decided to move. I didn't feel like potentially becoming the next statistic especially since I was running a one-man tech support firm and had lots of (expensive then) computer and bike equipment on-site. No thanks, I don't need that liability.
* So what on earth was I doing living in a 55+ condo development in my 20s? Long story short, high school/college buddy's uncle left the condo to him and I rented it for a couple years for super, super cheap.
I'm really surprised they allowed you to live there. Our community is a certified 55+ and we must have at least one occupant who is 55 years of age or older in each unit, no one under 18. The community must publish and comply with policies and procedures that demonstrate they intend to operate as “55 and older” housing. They do approve of a younger son or daughter living with a parent that needs assistance. When these people pass on they generally sell the home, one lady moved in that was in her 30's, it was left to her by her mother. Legal steps were taken and she was forced to move. We do have some rules but it's to protect us.
* So what on earth was I doing living in a 55+ condo development in my 20s? Long story short, high school/college buddy's uncle left the condo to him and I rented it for a couple years for super, super cheap.
Are you sure it was a 55+ community? Almost always they require at least one owner of a house/condo to be 55+. Subletting to people under 55 also isn't usually allowed. Most that I know of don't even allow lengthy visits (more than a few months), unless the under 55 person is caring for a sick relative.
Are you sure it was a 55+ community? Almost always they require at least one owner of a house/condo to be 55+. Subletting to people under 55 also isn't usually allowed. Most that I know of don't even allow lengthy visits (more than a few months), unless the under 55 person is caring for a sick relative.
The over-55 community near where I live allows 10% of residents owning a home to be under 55 but all residents must be over age 18. A friend of mine was able to buy into one when he was 49 years old because of that little loophole. Not sure all of them have it.
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