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Yup - how many people can count on kids being close enough to come over and change a light bulb? I mean, really?! So find a fix-it guy for repairs and even a neighborhood teen who can climb a ladder for a light bulb or wash your windows, etc.
I'm really surprised by the replies I'm seeing here. She may live in an area where there are no teenagers to do anything for anyone. I myself live in a semi-rural area of all old people. The few that live on this road are are beyond climbing ladders or doing much of anything. The last fix-it guy died about 10 yrs ago. Not everyone lives in a town or city, or a neighborhood where you'd trust letting a stranger in your home.
She'd probably be wise to find a long term care facility. Most major cities or metro areas have a facility that you can buy into, and move into when you are still active and ambulatory,....
That takes money. Before he passed away last summer my BIL was paying almost $2000 a month for such a place. Not everyone has that kind of money. Many are living on nothing but their SS checks.
By the way, can someone explain to me how it is people can no longer change light bulbs? Is it their balance? Did they not go to yoga to practice their balance over the years? Did they not practice balance in the shower everyday by standing on one foot to scrub the other foot?
You have to ask? Because of one of the meds I take, I am not allowed, by my Dr., to climb a ladder to remove the globes and change the light bulbs in my home. Or use a ladder to clean ceiling fans.
I can change the lamp bulbs but none that require a ladder or step-ladder. I'm 71 yrs old. I'm sure I'm not the only senior in this no-ladder boat.
Be aware that many (most?) state-funded agencies helping seniors with home care or day care for "free" or low cost have an estate recovery program (i.e., after you die the state can claim from your estate what they spent on you). Something to keep in mind.
Once you are deceased, what difference would it make? If your kids weren't there for you they don't deserve to inherit whatever you leave behind.
There are various agencies that provide free services to all seniors or to low income seniors. She can contact her local Council on Aging for more information. This is for things like rides to doctors, house hold chores, and things like that.
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Originally Posted by RiverBird
Be aware that many (most?) state-funded agencies helping seniors with home care or day care for "free" or low cost have an estate recovery program (i.e., after you die the state can claim from your estate what they spent on you). Something to keep in mind.
Yes, there are agencies that do have "estate recovery programs" but there are also free programs. Local agencies can help you find the free programs.
There is a huge volunteer program in my area (hundreds of volunteers) who do minor repairs, drive seniors to appointments, handle some household chores. It is not designed to provide on-going type of help, like a home health care provider would do but occasional odd jobs type of things.
Many of the volunteers are retired people who have plenty of time to volunteer but are still healthy enough to drive and do things for others.
There is another program, in my city, that has teenagers & young adults paired with elderly neighbors to shovel snow & move grass for free. However, that program often has far more people needing help than volunteers.
Of course there are also paid services. One major one in my area is Rent a Daughter. It is rather pricey but you can hire the types of things that a daughter would often do for elderly parents (cooking, bathing, medication help, companionship, house hold help).
..........The community is so popular that the national company that runs it is breaking ground on another one this year on the opposite side of my city.
These places are way beyond what the average person can afford. These are for those with not only pensions but savings and investments. Some of these places run $5000 or more a month. And all the extras you have to pay for.
I have a friend who is estranged from her adult children through no fault of her own. They are involved with drugs and she has reached the end of her rope as far as trying to help them. She is just now beginning to realize at age 70 that she is entirely alone and beginning to panic about who will care for her if she gets sick and infirm. She isn't poor but what money she does have must be stretched out for who-knows-how long.
She needs to start looking into what is available for her when that day comes. Maybe you can spare her a little time and help her. Children are no longer dependable as they once were where parents are concerned. They no longer feel obligated or motivated by love to be there for the elderly parent. And "that" after the years of sacrifice and expense the parent had in raising them. Times have changed. I have one son and really have no idea how to reach him. No address or phone number. I know I can't depend on him in my old age. He's like the wind, a free spirit that comes and goes. I think he's still living somewhere in NYC about 900 miles away. That's all I know. But unlike your friend I have my husband's family to call in an emergency. And two have offered to take over the bills should the day come I am unable. She needs to do something now!
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What do people like this do? No family or church or actual people to depend on to help with paying bills, making decisions, physical things like changing light bulbs, packing up boxes, etc?
She needs to start making plans now. And it wouldn't hurt if she started to go to church or a senior center to meet people and perhaps make some friends.
These places are way beyond what the average person can afford. These are for those with not only pensions but savings and investments. Some of these places run $5000 or more a month. And all the extras you have to pay for.
And that's why I keep stressing that people need to save and invest. To expect the kids to pay wouldn't you consider that decreasing their ability to be able to take care of themselves when they are old?
It's not changing light bulbs for me. It's climbing on a ladder when you can't lift up your legs very high and have no strength in them and you need two hands to hold on (so what do you do with the light bulb?). It's even worse when you are short, too. I'm 5'2". I would have trouble getting on a train or bus or getting in a truck or van, these days, so I stay out of them. Lamps aren't an issue, just ceiling lights. In my apartment complex, the maintenance guys change your ceiling light bulbs whether you are 25 or 75 years old.
I had to move from my second floor apartment to a ground floor apartment so I didn't have to deal with stairs. I can't climb or go down stairs unless there is a railing. I have to think about going up and down curbs. Will my legs buckle when I step down? Luckily, I can park perpendicular to a curb and use the hood of my car to step up and down. I have a small lightweight cart with 4 wheels I take with me to bring things to and from my car to home and vice versa.
I can't sit on the floor to assemble anything because I can't stand up unless I pull myself up. I have a reacher in case I drop something under my desk.
You mentioned the shower. I don't stand in the shower. I sit. I cannot stand for any length of time nor can I lift my leg over the side of the tub while standing. I had to have physical therapy at home to learn how to do it while sitting on a bench.
I need to sit in chairs with arm rests or have a table in front of me so I can use my arms to stand up (push off). I have learned to take photos from the car. You can't tell from the photos but it does limit the places you can go to.
I vote early so I don't have to stand in line. I have to assess whether I can do everything based on how long I might have to wait while standing. Can't go to concerts or rallies. Can't go on tours where you walk. Couldn't sing in a choir. Couldn't stand up at a party to socialize. I don't go to the mall because I hate shopping and have done it online for a long time but if I liked it, that would be an issue.
I have a rollater but I leave it in the car just in case I need it. I used it on my road trip earlier this month to go from my car to an overlook and to walk on uneven ground (pebbles) and to go to a Visitors Center. I can put my heavy camera on the seat and the rollater folds up to put in my car. My arms are strong. I sleep in a chair so when I stay in a motel/hotel I have to make sure there is a comfortable chair/couch in the room when I make reservations. I'm probably one of the few hotel guests who requests a room near the elevator.
But, I won't take a handicapped tag for the car. It's good for me to walk. I just have to do it with a little planning. And, I pay people to do some things for me or with me, like packing or cleaning.
Except for kneeling, my legs were perfectly fine until this thing happened to me two years ago. It was not a matter of falling/tripping balancing like you see on TV. With me it was a matter of my legs turning to jelly. I live by myself so I'm very careful.
You would be surprised to know what you don't pay attention to when you don't have mobility issues. I never did. Now everything I do is a calculation to make sure I don't go down. Point is, it can happen to anyone. Even you, yoga man.
I am sorry about the medical condition with your legs. Good for you for soldiering on and continuing to go and do. "Legs turning to jelly" I hadn't heard of. Does that condition have a medical name?
You have to ask? Because of one of the meds I take, I am not allowed, by my Dr., to climb a ladder to remove the globes and change the light bulbs in my home. Or use a ladder to clean ceiling fans.
I can change the lamp bulbs but none that require a ladder or step-ladder. I'm 71 yrs old. I'm sure I'm not the only senior in this no-ladder boat.
Yes, I have to ask. If a person doesn't know something, asking about it is a reasonable way to proceed. That is how we learn things. Do you know everything? Do you know anybody who knows everything?
Thanks for taking the trouble to respond. Too bad you had to be snide about it.
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Because of one of the meds I take, I am not allowed, by my Dr., to climb a ladder to remove the globes and change the light bulbs in my home. Or use a ladder to clean ceiling fans. 
