Do you enjoy visiting your family (parents, siblings, children, grandparents, in-laws, etc. )?
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Yes, I do. Just got back from a family wedding that was a long time in the making, and we had an absolutely wonderful time. We've had our ups and downs as a family, and right now my father is terminally ill, which puts a damper on things, but overall I love spending time with everyone. They're really great people!
We also had a fabulous time at a family wedding this summer. People flew in from all over the country and we basically took over the hotel for 3 days. We had so much fun seeing everyone all together. It doesn't happen often.
This will sound bad, but it's like swallowing a bitter pill for me (and him, he calls it 'brutal'). It's completely obligatory for both of us with certain family members.
But my husband's parents are dysfunctional and so is my family (drunks) so it's difficult for many reasons. I feel like I drag my body over there. This will also sound bad, but I really wish our next move was at a distance where we didn't have to visit so much.
I enjoy visits with my parents, particularly by dad but that's about it these days. I had a family dinner with some aunts, uncles and cousins recently who have annoyed me for various reasons over the years (mostly using my mom for things and doing nothing for her) and it wasn't fun.
My family? My brothers for sure. They're great guys. The older we get, the closer we get.
Meanwhile, my sister is a rampant narcissist, traits that she got from our mother. Everything is about her at all times. She forms instant opinions on any topic, regardless of how little she knows on the subject, and won't budget.
Case in point? My nephew and I over dinner were discussing the book Into Thin Air by Krakauer, about an Everest climb that turned into a disaster. My sister catches it and chimes in, "Everest? Pfft. Anybody could climb Mount Everest. I could do it next week." Never mind that one-tenth of all people who attempt it die, that you are literally stepping over the bodies on the way to the summit. According to my sister? Easy-cheesy. There's practically a gift shop at the top.
And my mother isn't happy unless she's slicing and dicing someone.
My in-laws are roughly the same. They literally sit in the den twelve hours a day and trash anybody and everybody. How others live their lives, how they spend their money, how they raise their kids, you name it.
Case in point? Last Thanksgiving, we pull in after a three-hour drive. My father-in-law is watching a football game. I grab a beer and sit down. I am in my seat literally ten seconds when a commercial comes on.
"Let me ask you a question." Uh oh.
"Shoot."
"Why are there so many black people in commercials." Really? Really? You're going to open with that?
I think how best to answer this without ruining Thanksgiving entirely. As it is, it's going to be a long freaking weekend. Finally:
"Why do you even care?"
What follows is this long rambling diatribe on how there are too many black people on television and how he disapproves of interracial marriage. Finally, he peters out. My reply?
"Yeah, I don't agree. And who someone marries isn't my business." Followed by a swift change of subject.
My wife's sister is awesome and she married a great guy. And my brother-in-law's wife is pretty cool, too. But the rest of them? Let's just say that I usually need an outing halfway through the weekend for the sake of my sanity. My brother's wife has to go to a couple of AA meetings just to get through the weekend with them. And when we pull out of the driveway on Sunday morning for home, it's all I can do to not pull a Dukes Of Hazzard kind of exit with squealing tires and doughnuts on the driveway. That's how bad it is.
As I've gotten older, there are fewer family members who I enjoy spending time with. Things aren't the same as they were years ago and some people have grown very bitter and crabby. My parents are both divorced and remarried and it's awkward to have them both around at the same time. My only sibling is completely self absorbed and dysfunctional. My relationship with my extended family is nearly non-existent...mainly due to lack of common interests and personality differences. My husband's family is also a mess...they never got their $h*t together and it shows. It's just not enjoyable so presently he and I are focusing on making our home as enjoyable as possible with our kids.
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