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Before I would ever ever put the dogs and kids together again. I would have a sit-down with the parents then a very calm and teaching moment with the kids explaining about behaving around dogs in general and this dog specifically. The moment the situation starts going south, the dogs get to leave. If that can't or won't happen the dogs need to be not out when the kids come over.
. I believe we could've done more. We will try to next time when they come.
Something to bear in mind:
Dogs have no concept of "intentions". If your intention, or indeed the other parents intention, is to make reparation... that's all very well and good, but it is not something the dog can comprehend.
I strongly, strongly urge you to not allow these particular children around the dog again until such time as they've "passed" a behaviour test - perhaps with your other dog. They want Hef? Fine, they can work for the privilege. They must learn the rules. They don't do that with their own dog? Well, that's their dog, but Hef is YOUR dog and these are the rules. End of.
Let me put it to you another way - what is going to happen if one of the children doesn't listen again, and yet again Hef is on the receiving end of something Hef perceives as harassment &/ physical punishment? What will happen if Hef, perceiving himself to be between a rock and a hard place yet again, bites out of fear? In fairness to the dog, he's been there once and he was scared....
What the humans know, think, or think they know does not matter. What matters here is how Hef perceives what happened and/or his perception of a similar incident again (without due time and training in the interim).
From the dog's perspective, what happened is something very simple. It goes like this: there were small children, they were noisy and frightening, I got a kick, I reacted and in reward the frightening objects were removed. IT WORKED.
It does not matter to Hef that you removed him - what matters to Hef is that it worked, the fear-inducing situation was resolved. The children and the dog were separated. Dog breathes a sigh of relief.
I personally would not expose my dog (if Hef was my dog) to a similiar situation until such time had passed that a) the dog had undergone a certain amount of reconditioning so that I was satisfied that the dog did not perceive children as "beings causing fear", but they were now associated with nice things like treats and tickles and affection. I also would not re-exposed my dog until I was further satisfied that the children had also been appropriately "re-conditioned".
Thank you all. Thank you FiveHorses. When I said "next time" I mean we will try different strategy next time. I will definitely try the tips you and the others told me!!!I will definitely keep you updated how it goes...
This is so infuriating! It drives me NUTS when people think a dog should just tolerate anything, like it is an object.
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the parent WAS THERE and SAW EVERYTHING, and he was "that dog is bad etc."!!!
Myself, I would have interjected, and spoke to the child "oh no, Hef isn't bad! Did you ever have a friend push you down and you wanted to hit them? Dogs don't like to be hit or pushed either. You have to be nice"
That would be addressing the child's behavior, and getting the message to the parents!
My neighbors (and friends)behind me have 4 kids. One of them (thankfully, just the one!) will very often kick my fence when my dog is outside, instigating and when the dog is barking at the fence trying to kick it into him. I go out there and yell at him every time he does this, and tell him it is unacceptable before it happens. I have also called the parents on the phone several times and said "Tommy is antagonizing my dog and my dog WILL bite him if he gets the opportunity". The mom "gets" it, but dad insists on making it out to be "boys will be boys" and dogs shouldn't bite.
I have also called the parents on the phone several times and said "Tommy is antagonizing my dog and my dog WILL bite him if he gets the opportunity". The mom "gets" it, but dad insists on making it out to be "boys will be boys" and dogs shouldn't bite.
I know!!!Explanations like "boys will be boys etc" are so frustrating...
Well, as the mom of two little boys, it is undeniably TRUE that "boys will be boys." That, however, is no excuse for allowing the child to misbehave, especially when that misbehavior involves taunting/teasing a dog.
In this house, there is NO excuse for mistreating an animal. I understand that little kids can play rough, but I've always shown them how to pet our animals with the words "nicely" and "gentle."
Well, as the mom of two little boys, it is undeniably TRUE that "boys will be boys." That, however, is no excuse for allowing the child to misbehave, especially when that misbehavior involves taunting/teasing a dog.
That is what I meant. English is not my first language, therefore, sometimes I express myself wrongly. I moved here 4 years ago. But I am learning.
Poor Hef! No, it is not the dog's fault for snapping back at this kid although it did sound like Hef shoved the kid more than bit him. I don't think that no matter how much these kids asked to have the dogs let out, I probably would not have done so. It was nice of you to oblige them, but it turned into you becoming the "responsible parent" and the parents just standing back and watching it all happen. Are you sure that they were not using your dogs as a "testing ground" for them to see how the kids would react to dogs? It sure seems strange that they got a dog shortly after having harrassed poor Hef..??? If this is the case...I would definitely not ever let the dogs out when they visit..next time they will bring their new puppy over to test him out on Hef. Geesh.
If you do get as chance to go over to see this family and see how they react to their new dog you probably should. This to me sounds like a family who gets a dog for the kids and then seeing that the kids are not going to take care of it or play with it, they tire of the dog and it ends up in a shelter. Some people unlike yourself, don't get it when it comes to a pet and I fear this couple might be just those people. Call it doggie intervention but you seem to have a firm grip on pet owning and maybe your friends need a little "Doggie 101".
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That, however, is no excuse for allowing the child to misbehave, especially when that misbehavior involves taunting/teasing a dog.
What would you do
