Single guy moving to des moines Iowa, how is the dating and social life? (Iowa City: apartments, rent)

[josh238]

Im a single guy nearing 30 in a good profession. How is the dating life for young professionals here. Is it difficult?

im currently from a college town- and while there are people its tough to be dating those in their early 20s. The town otherwise is quiet small <50,000 without students, over 150 with.

How is Des moine in comparison? I know its not chicago, but im still hoping to find a pretty girl who is like minded and date-able. Also Im a minority and not sure what effect that will have on it.

Your thoughts?

Frankly Im kinda scared.

[ElleTea]

Originally Posted by josh238

Im a single guy nearing 30 in a good profession. How is the dating life for young professionals here. Is it difficult?

im currently from a college town- and while there are people its tough to be dating those in their early 20s. The town otherwise is quiet small <50,000 without students, over 150 with.

How is Des moine in comparison? I know its not chicago, but im still hoping to find a pretty girl who is like minded and date-able. Also Im a minority and not sure what effect that will have on it.

Your thoughts?

Frankly Im kinda scared.

Don't be scared, they can sense your fear!

It's all about putting yourself out there. Are you new to the area? Moving specifically to Des Moines? (if so we should move this to the DM forum)

[lurtsman]

Des Moines specifically is the only place in Iowa where you would have a decent chance at meeting a large pool of intelligent single women your age. Of course, it may also happen if you live next to the border of Nebraska so you can utilize Omaha. If taxes and weather were completely ignored, Des Moines would probably be a top 10 or 15 city for its size. It is kind of like an oasis in that regard because the rest of the state is largely undesirable even excluding taxes and weather.

Overall, as you pointed out, you won't have anywhere near the level of selection you would in a city like Chicago. In my opinion, being in a state with awful winters also makes it harder to get out there and meet people because it makes outdoor interactions less enjoyable. I assume you aren't going to look for long term relationship material at a bar, because that would be the single stupidest strategy any person has ever employed.

Iowa City has several beautiful college girls, but the ones that are really desirable to have as a wife are usually taken by the time they are 24. Further, a large portion of those ladies are out of state with rich parents in Chicago paying the out-of-state tuition. Therefore, even if you had a career in Iowa City, the most desirable dating partners would not be such a great fit for long term relationships because they do not intend to stay in Iowa City. In Des Moines, you may actually find a potential spouse that would be happy to live there with you.

[Meemur]

Who needs the bars? There's the Des Moines Social Club, which is good for 30- and 40-somethings, not to mention a small percentage of us silver-haired folks end up there for certain events:

Des Moines Social Club

There's also meet-ups . . . haven't been to any of those since last summer.

It depends on your interests, but it seems like the only bored people I know are those who rent movies and hang out at home every weekend.

(Not that there's anything wrong with that but there are other choices . . . )

[josh238]

Interesting and nice to know. I will be in des moines and hope to move into the city- Ive noticed a few streets are pretty dense with bars and things to do- so I hope to find an apartment in that area. Frankly the cost of living there seems extremely manageable- ie for about 800 bucks a month you can get a really nice apartment. I wouldnt mind that at all.

I am hoping that des moines has a lot of things to do and even though it can be wintry- I assume people will still want to go out downtown.

Would you say the city downtown is relatively safe? IE its safe for people to walk to bars or events even at 10pm?

Are there certain locations to avoid?

Snow bothers me less since Ive lived in upstate NYC where we had over 100 inches snow a year. How bad can it really get in des moines?

[josh238]

anyone

[maniac77]

Originally Posted by josh238

Interesting and nice to know. I will be in des moines and hope to move into the city- Ive noticed a few streets are pretty dense with bars and things to do- so I hope to find an apartment in that area. Frankly the cost of living there seems extremely manageable- ie for about 800 bucks a month you can get a really nice apartment. I wouldnt mind that at all.

I am hoping that des moines has a lot of things to do and even though it can be wintry- I assume people will still want to go out downtown.

Would you say the city downtown is relatively safe? IE its safe for people to walk to bars or events even at 10pm?

Are there certain locations to avoid?

Snow bothers me less since Ive lived in upstate NYC where we had over 100 inches snow a year. How bad can it really get in des moines?

Sorry for the delayed response. The Des Moines forum isn't exactly hopping (though there are a lot of high quality posters here), but take that as a positive sign that people in Des Moines are out doing things and enjoying their lives. The bar scene really isn't my thing, so I can't really comment on that. I hear that downtown and Ingersoll have good bar scenes, and they are good areas for the most part. I've heard it can get loud at times if you have an apartment next to Ingersoll, so you might take that into consideration if noise is an issue for you. Some parts of downtown and Ingersoll might seem kind of grimy or sketchy, but they really aren't IMO. I've been down there several times and I've never had an issue.

There are also a lot of apartments on Grand (1 street north of Ingersoll) where a lot of medical students and young professionals live. Those are close enough to the action, but far enough away to get some peace. You can easily get a nice apartment for $800 a month. Choosing a good apartment or loft is imperative. Make sure that the place you rent isn't a slum.

The only safety concern I would have living downtown or on Ingersoll and frequenting the bars there would be drunk people. It's not commonplace or anything, but once in a while I'll hear about an occasional bar fight where an innocent bystander gets hurt for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Walking home from bars and events should be safe as well. There doesn't seem to be the opportunists looking to mug people or as much of a homeless presence as you might find in other cities. But take caution as you would in any city.

The problem you might have in Des Moines is that it can feel desolate downtown, which can make it seem unsafe. While it has improved greatly over the years with numerous activities downtown throughout the year, it can still feel quite barren at times during weeknights and on the weekends. You might find yourself walking alone. It used to be that people just went downtown to work, but it has quickly grown into a place where people live, work, and play. And the population downtown seems to be growing. Even so, it doesn't always feel that way. There's a skywalk system, and there's not a lot of foot traffic on the sidewalks at times (especially when it's cold), so that can contribute to that desolate feel as well.

If you've lived in upstate New York, a Des Moines winter should be no problem for you. Our winters vary. Some years they're pretty mild and there's not as much snow, ice, or below zero temps, and other years winters are miserable and can last from November through May and we constantly get pummeled by system after system with a plethora of snow, ice, heavy winds, and below zero temps. This year it seems like it's going to be the latter. The weird thing about the weather here is that there can be a wind chill of -50 and it'll be a sunny day. It does seem like we get a lot of sunshine despite the snowy conditions. While it can get really bad, I'm fairly sure it's nothing you haven't seen before.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

[lurtsman]

Originally Posted by josh238

Interesting and nice to know. I will be in des moines and hope to move into the city- Ive noticed a few streets are pretty dense with bars and things to do- so I hope to find an apartment in that area. Frankly the cost of living there seems extremely manageable- ie for about 800 bucks a month you can get a really nice apartment. I wouldnt mind that at all.

I am hoping that des moines has a lot of things to do and even though it can be wintry- I assume people will still want to go out downtown.

Would you say the city downtown is relatively safe? IE its safe for people to walk to bars or events even at 10pm?

Are there certain locations to avoid?

Snow bothers me less since Ive lived in upstate NYC where we had over 100 inches snow a year. How bad can it really get in des moines?

Hey Josh,

The cost of living there isn't bad. Rents are very reasonable. The taxes are high in all regards, but the cost of land and building is so low that rents can remain low even after the landlord factors in property taxes. I think 800 gives you room to get some really great apartments out there.

"A lot of things to do" can be difficult to quantify. The city isn't dead, but it also won't compete with much larger cities. Still, you should be able to find things to do. The winter will put a major damper on things, but there will still be some people who will fight the cold for the opportunity to do something. Some people will want to go downtown, some won't. When I lived in Iowa, I rarely made a trip out in the winter unless it was required. Note, the part of Iowa I lived in was substantially inferior to Des Moines.

It appeared to me that the downtown area was relatively safe, but you'll want someone that actually lives in Des Moines to chime in. I'm sure there are areas to avoid, but I don't know which areas they are. My trips in to Des Moines just weren't that frequent.

The weather patterns are largely the same throughout the state. You got more snow in upstate NY, but I think you'll get more cold in Iowa. Still, you should be prepared for quite a bit of cold coming from NY. You'll see the sun much more in Iowa in the winter, but it doesn't bring enough heat IMO.

You might feel a little starved for the livelihood of New York after a while. Personally, I like having a large (1 million plus) city within easy driving distance.

[capitalcityguy]

For the most part, downtown is safe. Not really any specific areas to avoid, but as another points out, I prefer to walk down streets where others are also walking vs taking a desserted looking street. That said, you dont' read or hear about muggings or assaults in downtown. About the only issue that seems to come up, are related to drunkenness and the related issues that can occur when everyone is filing out of the bars at 2:00am.

I've aged out of the bar scene, so can't speak to it firsthand though.

[atler8]

What is your situation (as in specific locale you are interested in, etc.) & what do you need to know on on beyond what has been posted here in earlier replies?