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Assuming the less attractive person doesn't have status or is rich. Because one could point to that as being the reason they're with that person. I know attractiveness is subjective to an extent. But, sometimes you can tell that someone didn't win in the looks department. On a scale of 1 to 10, if a 10 means they're really attractive, they'd be a 1 or 2. The attractive person could have chosen someone attractive or even someone average looking. Does anyone know of a couple like this or is in such a relationship?
What are the reasons why they picked him or her as their partner? I'm not trying to offend anyone or anything. I'm just curious for their reasons.
Height. Especially if the woman is tall (5'9+). I have seen a decent number of couples where the woman was very attractive and tall and the man was much taller but very facially challenged. There are some women who will look past a downright hideous face if a man is tall and well-built. I am assuming here that your 1 to 10 scale is referring to face only.
Now granted, Adriana Lima's ex was a pro basketball player and thus had the money and status, but I could see a non-celebrity version of Adriana Lima going for a guy like this.
Your friends perceived attractiveness goes up and the people who annoy you become less attractive.
I do sometimes wonder if this is more of a thing with women. For example, if you ask the average woman to describe her friends, they are all "gorgeous" and "beautiful" and "super successful" and "intelligent" and "a catch!" Also, if you ask her about a good-looking male celebrity who says or does something she doesn't like, she might call him "unattractive."
I think it's often different for men. Ask the average guy about his friends and he's probably fully aware (and will admit) that there's a hierarchy where maybe one buddy who is tall, good-looking and outgoing easily gets women and another who is not so tall, not so good-looking and not so outgoing struggles a lot more with women. You're less likely to hear a man describe his 5'3 and pudgy best friend as "super handsome!" just because he's had his back since the 3rd Grade.
I know a couple where the woman admits she's with him because he's nice. What does that meeean. Also people have pointed it out to her that he's ugly. He's a nice guy. What I don't understand is that there are other nice men out there. Most men are better looking than him. She loves him. She dated and married someone who she's always known to be ugly. He's a carpenter, he's not rich or popular. He's average in everything except below average in looks. I don't know if I'll ever know why she and other people pick who they picked. People say you can't be with someone you don't find attractive, you can't have sex with them, you can't love them, I would agree with that if I didn't personally know this 1 couple.
All I know is that when we went out as a group of girls, the one beauty among us got ALL the attention. The rest of us were decent looking and all decked out but she would be gorgeous sans makeup if wearing a potato sack. Personality didn't matter, she was actually not that bright and that seemed to even make her more attractive to the guys. We could be the nicest most funny and personable gals but those men could not take their eyes off our gorgeous friend. She was humble about it and embarrassed at getting all the attention. No jealousy she was a sweetheart, married an average guy and had two children who are also extremely attractive.
Yep, there's probably one like that in every group of girlfriends. Our friend wasn't dumb though, she was extremely talented musically both singing and playing piano, organ, guitar, you name it, she could play it.
A couple times she was stopped for speeding and the cops asked her out!
In general, in my observation, it seems women's looks are more important to men than men's looks are to women. Broad generalization, I know. And I've seen women go nutty over a really handsome man, so it goes both ways.
But the broader question is, what is "attractive" and what's "unattractive"? As others have said, it's much more than looks alone. Looks might attract but it's what's below the surface, the real person, that makes the connection.
Usually though people pair up with their equivalent in looks, personality and talents.
If we see a couple that doesn't seem "matched" physically and we want to know whyyy there's more going on there than meets the eye.
Last edited by RubyandPearl; 05-13-2024 at 10:06 PM..
I do sometimes wonder if this is more of a thing with women. For example, if you ask the average woman to describe her friends, they are all "gorgeous" and "beautiful" and "super successful" and "intelligent" and "a catch!" Also, if you ask her about a good-looking male celebrity who says or does something she doesn't like, she might call him "unattractive."
I think it's often different for men. Ask the average guy about his friends and he's probably fully aware (and will admit) that there's a hierarchy where maybe one buddy who is tall, good-looking and outgoing easily gets women and another who is not so tall, not so good-looking and not so outgoing struggles a lot more with women. You're less likely to hear a man describe his 5'3 and pudgy best friend as "super handsome!" just because he's had his back since the 3rd Grade.
In general I think guys are more visual than women. I think women's bodies are a lot more interesting to men than men's bodies are to women. So I suspect the effect is smaller in men than women. But that doesn't mean that there is no effect.
With some women when I first meet them, they may not initially show up on my radar. Later I will find myself thinking she is cute why didn't I notice her earlier? Also there have been some women after I break up with them I find myself thinking that "she not that attractive", at first I dismissed that as sour grapes, but there were women that I obsessed about in high school who when I look back at our high school yearbook I find myself asking why was I so obsessed about her? There has been enough time where I really don't think it's still sour grapes. I think my perceived attraction probably does change based upon how I feel about a given woman.
It's a subtle effect so we may not always notice we are doing this.
Yep, there's probably one like that in every group of girlfriends. Our friend wasn't dumb though, she was extremely talented musically both singing and playing piano, organ, guitar, you name it, she could play it.
A couple times she was stopped for speeding and the cops asked her out!
In general, in my observation, it seems women's looks are more important to men than men's looks are to women. Broad generalization, I know. And I've seen women go nutty over a really handsome man, so it goes both ways.
But the broader question is, what is "attractive" and what's "unattractive"? As others have said, it's much more than looks alone. Looks might attract but it's what's below the surface, the real person, that makes the connection.
Usually though people pair up with their equivalent in looks, personality and talents.
If we see a couple that don't seem "matched" physically and we want to know whyyy there's more going on there than meets the eye.
I agree with your third paragraph where you write that generally, “women’s looks are more important to men than men’s looks are to women”.
Assuming the less attractive person doesn't have status or is rich. Because one could point to that as being the reason they're with that person. I know attractiveness is subjective to an extent. But, sometimes you can tell that someone didn't win in the looks department. On a scale of 1 to 10, if a 10 means they're really attractive, they'd be a 1 or 2. The attractive person could have chosen someone attractive or even someone average looking. Does anyone know of a couple like this or is in such a relationship?
What are the reasons why they picked him or her as their partner? I'm not trying to offend anyone or anything. I'm just curious for their reasons.
1. Because beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
2. Because they bring something to the table that money can't buy i.e. height, laughter, joy, youth, etc.
3. Because the 10 knows the 1 probably won't cheat or leave them.
4, Because the 10 gets treated like a king or queen by the 1.
5. Because the 10 truly doesn't care about looks, only personality.
6. Because sometimes a 10 doesn't see themselves as a 10.
I worked with a very tall handsome ripped and successful man, he could've married any woman in the world, but his wife was a 1. I never seen anything like it. I didn't understand it, but it's clear that she just treated him right and/or he just doesn't care about looks.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BajanYankee
Height. Especially if the woman is tall (5'9+). I have seen a decent number of couples where the woman was very attractive and tall and the man was much taller but very facially challenged. There are some women who will look past a downright hideous face if a man is tall and well-built.
100% correct. Height is absolutely a factor that can overcompensate for an ugly face. I've seen it.
Pete Davidson dated Kim Kardashian and Ariana Grande, granted he does have celebrity status, but he also is 6'3" and at that height you will almost always be the tallest man in the room.
Some women want tall kids, and it doesn't matter how broke, ugly, unfunny, bald, hairy, or fat you are. Relatively speaking.
Its all subjective, I may find someone attractive where others may not, and vice versa. I can honestly say though that when I see troll walking around with a very attractive woman on his arm, its hard not to wonder what the attraction is. Based on the comments in this thread, I once again have an unpopular opinion, but appearance is extremely important to me. If I am not attracted to the outside, we will never be more than friends. I wouldnt want to be with someone who flaunts her looks, but rather someone that doesnt know how attractive she really is.
When I was younger I would see unattractive couples and think how nice it was that they found someone else to grow old with and that there is someone for everyone. As I get older, I now think that I would rather grow old alone than be with someone who I dont find attractive. There are so many beautiful women out there and I think to myself why settle when you dont have to. I hate having this mentality and I struggle with it.
Height. Especially if the woman is tall (5'9+). I have seen a decent number of couples where the woman was very attractive and tall and the man was much taller but very facially challenged. There are some women who will look past a downright hideous face if a man is tall and well-built.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocko20
100% correct. Height is absolutely a factor that can overcompensate for an ugly face. I've seen it.
Pete Davidson dated Kim Kardashian and Ariana Grande, granted he does have celebrity status, but he also is 6'3" and at that height you will almost always be the tallest man in the room.
Some women want tall kids, and it doesn't matter how broke, ugly, unfunny, bald, hairy, or fat you are. Relatively speaking.
1. there are shallow people who just look at physical attributes, height, weight, face, boobs, hair color even. I know a guy who would only date blonds. The majority of individuals are average, average height, average looks, and average income.
2. You know what they say about tall guys. Perhaps it is not the vertical height but the horizontal length.
3. Are you saying Pete Davidson is ugly? I see nothing wrong with his face.
4. My grand is over 6' 4". He does not attract a lot of women.
5. Lyal Lovett and Julia Roberts. He was only 3 inches taller than her. (some of that might be the hair).
6. A tall man may not produce tall children. There are 12,000 gene variants that determine height. My +6'4" grands brother is 5'9". Their dad is ~5'11 and mom is ~5'6.
I seriously dont think any woman has chosen a mate based on having tall children. Every mother I know just wants her children to be born healthy with no mental or physical anomalies.
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there's more going on there than meets the eye.