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Well, I think generally speaking, when one name follows another in parenthesis, that indicates a partner, married or not. Unless there is some reason you need to know if there were 'married,' I return to my original question. What does it matter?
If an obituary names a surviving daughter this way:
Survived by daughter Joan (Bob Warren) what % do we assume for:
a. Bob as the husband or
b. Bob only as a domestic partner of Joan.
No I can't ask Joan only looking for the proper etiquette when spouses are named in an obituary.
Thanks.
I assume that Bob is Joan's significant other in some way - be it a long-term boyfriend, partner, or husband - but Joan's last name could be a hint on whether they are legally married.
Regardless, if they are an established couple, that would be the proper etiquette of listing them in an obit.
Good comments and there is another way it could be listed.
Suppose the surviving child is a male and in the obituary it was listed like this:
John Doe died ........ and survived by a son Bob (Joan)
Everyone knows Bob's last name. And Joan's maiden name would not be shown. In the case Joan could be in any relationship as many have said but as far as %'s it's most likely Bob's wife via marriage.
"Back in my day", spouses weren't mentioned at all. It was just "survived by his son John of Bellville, daughter Joan Warren of Clarksville....etc.". When I started seeing "survived by his son John (Mary)...etc.", I was a bit confused. But yes, the person in parentheses is the partner, whether it's a spouse or not.
I was a bit hurt when my "partner aka boyfriend" died and I wasn't mentioned in the obituary at all. He'd been widowed six years when we got together, and we'd been together a year. I had done so much for him, mainly because his kids left him to his own devices with all his many medical problems and appointments. I remember when his daughter was visiting him in the hospital and I had to go downstairs to the lobby due to a visitor limit. She came back in about 15 minutes and said, "He's asking for you." I was devastated when he died suddenly and unexpectedly. Thought maybe I'd get a mention in the obit -- "companion" or whatever. Oh well.
Do people really evaluate parenthetical names that accompany immediate family member names in an obituary and wonder what the relationships are?
If there is talk that a couple might marry and then they show up in an obituary as Joan (Bob Warren) it would be helpful to know if it is Mr. and Mrs. Bob Warren or not.
If there is talk that a couple might marry and then they show up in an obituary as Joan (Bob Warren) it would be helpful to know if it is Mr. and Mrs. Bob Warren or not.
This is a very foreign, confusing notion. I can't say I've ever noticed or care at all about how someone is listed in a printed obit and what it might imply about their relationship status. YMMV.
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