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I'll admit that I did let my emotions get the best of me. I'll apologize to her and try to fix it.
Probably the best way to fix it is to re-connect her access to your photo albums and offer a lame excuse about how you don't know how it happened, must have been a mistake, etc. Then just let things go. Give her some space to respond or not and see how things go. Then re-evaluate once some time has passed.
I will say, though, you are in the right for calling her out about her comments regarding your child-bearing plans and career choices. It's one thing to express an opinion, but once you're responded, that should be the end of it. She doesn't get to have any say over these things.
Probably the best way to fix it is to re-connect her access to your photo albums and offer a lame excuse about how you don't know how it happened, must have been a mistake, etc. Then just let things go. Give her some space to respond or not and see how things go. Then re-evaluate once some time has passed.
I will say, though, you are in the right for calling her out about her comments regarding your child-bearing plans and career choices. It's one thing to express an opinion, but once you're responded, that should be the end of it. She doesn't get to have any say over these things.
I'll admit that I did let my emotions get the best of me. I'll apologize to her and try to fix it.
We never really know what someone may be going through. Sometimes the serious issues are held close to the chest and sharing can be painful. Her replying to your concern with a video makes me think she was avoiding telling you whats going on in her life and she deflected with a little humor. I'm glad you are going to apologize, hopefully she will eventually let you know what happened.
Why have people not yet learned the value of a good <return>?
Yes that OP was very difficult to read.
I don't blame the OP for being upset, I think it may be that he/she did not show interest in the job this other person suggested. Strange behavior for sure.
She said she is living vicariously thru you then you wonder why she gets mad when you aren't doing what she wants (you) to do.. This does seem pretty weird/annoying. A bit too close for comfort, imo, I can't really stand when people don't respect my life/time/privacy/choices. Maybe the space is good for you two right now.. ?
Well... you don't. If someone stops communicating with you-- especially if they won't respond if you reach out first-- that's a pretty good sign that they don't want to be in contact with you. So say "that sucks," accept it, and let them go. Hassling them isn't going to save the friendship.
(And, frankly, re: the photo albums: you respond to her by saying, "You have indicated that you're no longer interested in being friends, so naturally I assumed you no longer needed access to my social media.")
"i missed you. it was sad for me not to hear from you for a long while. i didn't know what was going on. i was worried. it felt like a lot of distance and i did not know what happened. yes i adjusted the settings on my photo album. i don't know what's going on and I miss you. can we talk sometime because i value our friendship."
at some point there needs to be a conversation, and not just text messages
i remember having a friend i was very close to at work. we were able to discuss work issues, this led to positive constructive input and solutions for both of us in various work scenarios. we also used each other as a "sounding board" for personal things in our lives that were going on and even though those personal issues did not really change, it was a relief to be able to share with each other. i was very supportive of her advancement in the company when she was going back to school and applying for different jobs. she was promoted, and then promoted again which is great for her.
however her new job took her elsewhere, to a different department and to a different building. with that came a shift in our interactions with each other. yes, i am more of an "out of sight, out of mind" person. she wanted, expected the same level of closeness and conversation, however for me that was more of an imposition because she wasn't right there sitting next to me. if i was busy in a meeting or slammed with a bunch of projects no i could not answer her texts. she became pushier about what is going on and it was apparent she was upset that we were not as close. it felt very awkward. the pushier she got and the more insistent she became about "still being friends" and demanding to know "what's wrong" the more i withdrew because it felt like a burden, an imposition on me. plus it started to feel more and more one sided. I was fine with letting our previous friendship change and shift. she was not she wanted more closeness and was in my view being very aggressive and making demands. i don't like being around people who are pushy and make demands of me.
it reached a point where i did not respond to her messages, so that she would just leave me alone. at that point i was relieved to not have the intrusion and demands. not all friendships survive a change in environment. if a person physically moves away then that changes the friendship. it doesn't mean anything is wrong. it just no longer works or is no longer fulfilling for both people in the way it once was when they were in close proximity.
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