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I was in a similar situation and I quit. If you are in a decent financial situation, I say quit and take a break and work through the post traumatic stress disorder a bit and then look for something else. My job situation was so bad, I am spending this non-working time de-stressing. Course, you need to be in a stable financial position to do this.
Don't quit just yet -- as horrible as it is -- but do document everything. From what I've read on the post so far it sounds like you will soon have a book.
I will start documenting on a regular basis. I do have many things written down, with dates and witnesses, but not everything. I'll start seriously doing this now.
One good thing about documenting no one is really noting.
You said you have worked there 15 years. That is very rare today. If they were to fire you it is very unlikely they would challenge unemployment because of this. The Labor Board of most states would really wonder about an employer saying they fired you for "performance reasons" if you've worked there for virtually a generation unless they proved something like that you were suddenly abusing drugs or something. But as a result having any documentation if they really did challenge unemployment will almost guarantee that they'll back down.
Good luck! My hope since it would be tough to quit right now is that they let you go in this manner and at least you can be paid to destress and job hunt.
Would I be able to collect unemployment if I resigned? I have heard it is difficult.
This varies so much from state to state until I would speak with an employment attorney before making any decisions. If you report him for being 'offensive'....you may or may not even fall under the whistle blowers act. But again, this can really be different in each state depending on their employment laws.
In California you would be good to go, in Florida you would be sunk. Maybe Texas is somewhere in between. You might find some answers on here: Texas Laws - TX Laws - State Laws, Codes
I'm thinking that going to HR is risky and they might not take your side (if he got a promotion after losing a sexual harrasment case then what would it take????).
However, if they know you and they know your boss, and they take his side, maybe the worst case scenrio is that they'd fire you (without cause) and you'd be free (and the best case scenario is that they'd let the boss go or help you with the situation)?
I did go to HR once, and I was let go afterwards, but they gave me a severance check (in exchange for me signing a release) and part of the agreement was that they would not contest unemployment. My situation was different though as I was only at the job for 6 weeks (I think they wanted to hire someone at a lower paying position as that is what they ended up doing and that is what the situation felt like at the time).
Getting let go has it's complications even if you get unemployment, so this is not strong advice, just an idea......
This varies so much from state to state until I would speak with an employment attorney before making any decisions. If you report him for being 'offensive'....you may or may not even fall under the whistle blowers act. But again, this can really be different in each state depending on their employment laws.
In California you would be good to go, in Florida you would be sunk. Maybe Texas is somewhere in between. You might find some answers on here: Texas Laws - TX Laws - State Laws, Codes
In most states (I'm most familiar with NY and CT; we're both collecting NY unemployment, but the job my wife was at before her last one was in CT and she collected UI from there), to get UI from quitting you'd have to really prove that your workplace environment bordered on "mental cruelty" and was a complete distraction to working. Pretty much you'd need to have a discrimination or harassment case won to prove it.
I am in a bad situation. My boss is literally a disaster to work for. He is doing everything he can to make my life miserable so I quit. Everything he is doing is legit, such as making me travel every night, do extra projects, putting me under the microscope every day. He wants to replace me with one of his buddies who is currently is a lower position.
I have known him for 15 years with this company and have loathed him all of that time. Now due to a promotion he is my boss.
I want to go to HR, but I fear he may make it worse on me if I do. Like I said, he is doing things to make me miserable, but they are work related. many co-workers are telling me to go to HR because if they were treated that way they would complain.
I worry about REALLY getting on his bad side by going to HR. My boss has a reputation of picking out one worker and bullying them. Now it's me.
I am looking for other work, but as we all know that is tough.
Any advice?
The most important thing to do is to behave in a way so that the boss has NO IDEA that he is getting to you. In fact, you must go OUT OF YOUR WAY to appear happy and cheerful around him at all times. This will result in ONE of two things.
1. He will give up;
2. He will get so frustrated that he will make a mistake.
If he gives up, which he probably won't then your problem is over. However, if he gets so frustrated that he becomes desperate then he WILL make a mistake. It is up to you to make absolutely certain that when that mistake is made that you are in a position to take full advantage of it.
It would be a very good idea to keep a voice activated recorder handy at ALL TIMES (please be very familiar with how it works so that when you need to have it working, and ON that you are not fumbling around trying to figure out what button to push). ANY TIME you are speaking with your boss, you need to have the recorder RUNNING. Better to have it in a pocket somewhere because if you are holding it, then your boss is going to be very reluctant to make "the big mistake".
Eventually, his level of frustration at trying to get you to quit is going to get to the point where he is going to do, or say, something illegal. You have GOT to be in a position to get PROOF of this the instant it happens. At that moment, you need to go to the head of HR and inform him of the events. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES HAND OVER YOUR EVIDENCE TO ANYONE. If the head of HR demands the proof, tell him your attorney is in possession of it (even if the event just happened). Or tell the HR guy that the evidence has been placed in a "secure location" to be used as proof at the trial. LOL
If you keep a cool head and do not let this bozo "win" then you will end up on top. People like this always mess up sooner or later. The object is to hang in there until he blows it. Hopefully, sooner than later.
The most important thing to do is to behave in a way so that the boss has NO IDEA that he is getting to you. In fact, you must go OUT OF YOUR WAY to appear happy and cheerful around him at all times. This will result in ONE of two things.
1. He will give up;
2. He will get so frustrated that he will make a mistake.
If he gives up, which he probably won't then your problem is over. However, if he gets so frustrated that he becomes desperate then he WILL make a mistake. It is up to you to make absolutely certain that when that mistake is made that you are in a position to take full advantage of it.
It would be a very good idea to keep a voice activated recorder handy at ALL TIMES (please be very familiar with how it works so that when you need to have it working, and ON that you are not fumbling around trying to figure out what button to push). ANY TIME you are speaking with your boss, you need to have the recorder RUNNING. Better to have it in a pocket somewhere because if you are holding it, then your boss is going to be very reluctant to make "the big mistake".
Eventually, his level of frustration at trying to get you to quit is going to get to the point where he is going to do, or say, something illegal. You have GOT to be in a position to get PROOF of this the instant it happens. At that moment, you need to go to the head of HR and inform him of the events. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES HAND OVER YOUR EVIDENCE TO ANYONE. If the head of HR demands the proof, tell him your attorney is in possession of it (even if the event just happened). Or tell the HR guy that the evidence has been placed in a "secure location" to be used as proof at the trial. LOL
If you keep a cool head and do not let this bozo "win" then you will end up on top. People like this always mess up sooner or later. The object is to hang in there until he blows it. Hopefully, sooner than later.
Good luck, and keep looking for another job.
20yrsinBranson
All of the advice on this site is top quality. I really appreciate everyone's input. I like this advice along with others, and I think I will incorporate many things you all have offered. Thanks again and keep the good ideas coming!
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