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Be a smart person and invest in where you are right now. You live in a college town. That means students are going to be constantly moving in and out over the years and need a place to live. If you save up and buy a home in town, you can rent out each room in that house and have years of passive income to do whatever the hell you want. You can buy more property, you can travel the world, you can retire early, you can reinvest in stocks, etc. You'll have much more disposable income and higher networth living where you are than in CA where you will inevitably be house poor, even in Sacramento.
The other advice I would say is get out of the country. If your job is remote, move to Spain, Czech Republic, Croatia, Vietnam, Bali, Belize, etc. Anywhere cheap with a digital nomad community so you can really experience a vast difference in lifestyle and step out of your comfort zone.
Right now I am thinking what route I want to take my life. I am 30 years old single guy and looking to move to a different area. I work in healthcare so I am able to move around quite easily. Now I have two dilemmas that I am thinking about. I live in a small college town in a different state and originally moved here to get some work experience. I already have work experience and am more employable now so looking to move somewhere else specifically cali since I grew up there. The place I currently am is too small town for me.
One place I am currently thinking of is sacramento. One reason I am thinking about moving here is because the pay is quite good and the cost of living is not as bad for the place. However I have no family here. I don't have any family where I currently live and it was little lonely. However pro was that I could do whatever I wanted. I would like to buy a house or real estate investment in the near future which would be more doable here. Heard there isn't as much to do around here tho. I see this route as being more business like decision.
The other route I am thinking of is moving back in with my parents in socal. Now the cost of living is higher but the pay is okay. I am guessing it would be what I am getting paid right now which is over 6 figures, but moving up north would be about a 20 dollar increase per hour. My thinking for moving here is I would live with my parents free rent, free food and just work and save up my money for down payment on a house eventually. Property here is very expensive we talking about a million for average house around here. Most of my family lives here. I lived with them before and its tolerable but my extended family can be more irritable. However living with family at 30 years old as a single person would be kind of hard in finding a relationship. Any advice or suggestions?
How about leaving Cali entirely? The taxes are high, shelter costs are high.
I personally would not move to a location I didn't like just for higher pay.
Living with your parents is not a bad move actually, but you should help with household expenses to some extent even if they don't insist you do that.
Be a smart person and invest in where you are right now. You live in a college town. That means students are going to be constantly moving in and out over the years and need a place to live. If you save up and buy a home in town, you can rent out each room in that house and have years of passive income to do whatever the hell you want. You can buy more property, you can travel the world, you can retire early, you can reinvest in stocks, etc. You'll have much more disposable income and higher networth living where you are than in CA where you will inevitably be house poor, even in Sacramento.
The other advice I would say is get out of the country. If your job is remote, move to Spain, Czech Republic, Croatia, Vietnam, Bali, Belize, etc. Anywhere cheap with a digital nomad community so you can really experience a vast difference in lifestyle and step out of your comfort zone.
His last thread he started, he was living in Tennessee, having co-worker bullying issues. Sounds like he's looking to get out of there.
I guess he would need a work from home job at least to travel over-seas. How does he get into another country to live there? A lot of countries only allow guests for a certain length of time then they have to leave.
As a woman, I wouldn't date a guy who's over 30 and living for free off his parents, unless his parents were elderly and needed his help. I would want a MAN, not a 30 year old moocher. You make really good money, so you can support yourself. A smart woman wants a financially independent man who takes care of his own business, pays his own bills, does his own laundry, cooks for himself, etc. You don't have to OWN a home, you can rent. Or just rent an apartment until you've saved up enough to make a down payment on a home or condo. There's definitely nothing wrong with having a roomie, if that's necessary to help save up for that purchase.
That said, I lived in the Sacramento area for many, many years. There is so much to do there. It's so varied. And it's so close to both the bay area, and the mountains. There's a great restaurant scene, it's close enough to the wine country of Napa/Sonoma, etc. Housing costs aren't nearly as bad as the bay area or SoCal. There are many outlying suburban areas, and you can pick the lifestyle you want, urban, suburban, or get out of town and go rural. There are plenty of hospitals, and tons of medical offices.
my parents are chill they dont really ask about that. my biggest issue would be sneaking a girl over or something or having a girl come chill at my place. it would be weird.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lifestruggles12
well i have been living on my own for awhile now which is nice. part of the reason is i want to own my own place and invest my money in like a house in a cool city instead of just throwing my money away renting. idk atm tho i am figuring out what i want out of my life.
Once a person's been used to living on their own, coming & going as they please, no one seeing your every move to comment about it, etc., I'd think that it would feel hard to move back in w/ parents no matter how close you are w/ them.
I'm very close w/ my mom. We talk on the phone daily w/o fail, but I don't really want to move back in w/ her after living on my own for the last 10 yrs. But I probably wouldn't have wanted to move back in even if I had lived on my own for just 1 year. You get used to doing your own thing quickly & no one wants mom or dad to necessarily see everything so they can comment about it.
I thought you were going to say that the 2nd option was moving close to family, but not actually back IN w/ them. So unless you really don't care about moving back in w/ parents, I'd more than likely choose Sacramento or a closer CA city & 4-7x/yr, just visit your parents & whichever other nice fam members you want to visit.
I would say move to Socal if you are lonely and miss your family. Nothing wrong with that.
Maybe consider just renting a small studio while saving up for a property. If you move with the parents then you should create a timeline on when to move out. Also, it shouldn't be Free. You will need to financially pitch in someway.
I would consider doing meetups, volunteer work to create friendships outside family.
Several of my coworkers are around age 30 or below, here in Southern California. All earn just below or around $100K/year.
Among them, there is no stigma about living with parents. None! Instead the emphasis is on saving money, growing their portfolios, improving their workplace skills and professional networking. Impressing recruiters and potential new employers counts far more than impressing a potential romantic interest - especially since the latter tends to be a brief fling, and is driven almost entirely by mix of physical appearance and conversational skill.
Let's not project Midwestern values on the West Coast! I've lived in both, and discern a staggering difference. For example, in the Midwest the emphasis is on moving-out as soon as one is able, and buying a house as soon as one is able. In Los Angeles, the emphasis is on maximizing one's Roth-IRA contributions as soon as one is able, and negotiating with management to get as many stock-options as one can. The house can wait... if necessary, forever.
So, in contradiction to the advice of most posters in this thread, I'd suggest:
1. Move back to SoCal, and move-in with your parents. Help out around the house, yes, but save as aggressively as you can.
2. Use SoCal professional opportunities to upgrade your skills. Maybe get a more advanced degree.
3. Save, save save!
4. Date casually, and don't feel in the least pressed to pursue with any sedulousness something "serious".
my parents are chill they dont really ask about that. my biggest issue would be sneaking a girl over or something or having a girl come chill at my place. it would be weird.
That's a reason enough to not want to live with your parents, IMO.
Also, I wouldn't dream of living rent free (and not paying for food) if I decided to move back in with the parents and I had a good paying job, but that's me.
All of this is to say that I'd take the job in Sacramento. Or if you want to be in an area closer to family, just rent your own place where your family is and get a job there, still.
As a woman, I wouldn't date a guy who's over 30 and living for free off his parents, unless his parents were elderly and needed his help. I would want a MAN, not a 30 year old moocher. You make really good money, so you can support yourself. A smart woman wants a financially independent man who takes care of his own business, pays his own bills, does his own laundry, cooks for himself, etc. You don't have to OWN a home, you can rent. Or just rent an apartment until you've saved up enough to make a down payment on a home or condo. There's definitely nothing wrong with having a roomie, if that's necessary to help save up for that purchase.
That said, I lived in the Sacramento area for many, many years. There is so much to do there. It's so varied. And it's so close to both the bay area, and the mountains. There's a great restaurant scene, it's close enough to the wine country of Napa/Sonoma, etc. Housing costs aren't nearly as bad as the bay area or SoCal. There are many outlying suburban areas, and you can pick the lifestyle you want, urban, suburban, or get out of town and go rural. There are plenty of hospitals, and tons of medical offices.
Well, as I suggested, he could live with his parents, but contribute something to the expenses.
A lot of kids move in with parents and mooch. But not all, and moving in with parents does not require you to be a mooch.
Well, as I suggested, he could live with his parents, but contribute something to the expenses.
A lot of kids move in with parents and mooch. But not all, and moving in with parents does not require you to be a mooch.
By all means, delay doing anything vaguely resembling adulthood as long as possible. Did you catch that he would feel weird "sneaking a girl in"? Why should a 30 year old have to "sneak" anything in their home. If having sex requires "sneaking" at 30, something is definitely not right in that situation. I mean seriously, you can fight and die for your country at 18, but you have to sneak a girl in????? How silly and immature.
I lived on my own with a roommate at age 18 while still in high school. Was that ideal? Absolutely not, and I wouldn't recommend it. But at 30, and making $100K per year, he should be able to figure out how to live on his own. He should probably also figure out where to live without having to ask random strangers on the internet who know nothing about him.
OP, what do you want from life? Do what steers you in that direction. Take a step towards owning your own decisions, and being your own man.
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Did you catch that he would feel weird "sneaking a girl in"? Why should a 30 year old have to "sneak" anything in their home. If having sex requires "sneaking" at 30, something is definitely not right in that situation. I mean seriously, you can fight and die for your country at 18, but you have to sneak a girl in????? How silly and immature. 
